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Women.. I don't understand them
- Thread starter powderfinger
- Start date
Nah, we're just from similar schools of thought!
Ive never officially been under Maki's tutelage, but I cant say I havent ever learned something from the guy.
both!
Head. Blown.
How does one manage to be both married and 'single by choice'. Unless, perhaps you are married and seperated? Or have been the former and are now the latter?
Not all women like having a project. In the words of Dan Savage, if you want a male companion you can groom and castrate, get a dog.
Now, that's not saying that two people in a relationship can't help each other and make each other better people, but I can't stand to read this and hear everyone say "Women are crazy and all of them just want to change everyone and all of them are like that." No we aren't. A lot of my friends aren't. a Few are. But even then, they are asking their boyfriends for reasonable life adjustments as they transition into adulthood.
Women want whatever they want. You can ask them. If they're straight-forward, great, you know up front. If they aren't, and you still decide to pursue it, it's your own fault. You knew she was being cryptic and contradictory from the start, but yet you're surprised when she plays games? Please.
Some men do it, some women do it. Stop generalizing about one sex. I've dated guys who were "the bad boy" and definitely broken. It sucked. Not everyone wants that. Some of us are in relationships with guys who are nice, smart, confident, respectful, etc. /endrant
Now, that's not saying that two people in a relationship can't help each other and make each other better people, but I can't stand to read this and hear everyone say "Women are crazy and all of them just want to change everyone and all of them are like that." No we aren't. A lot of my friends aren't. a Few are. But even then, they are asking their boyfriends for reasonable life adjustments as they transition into adulthood.
Women want whatever they want. You can ask them. If they're straight-forward, great, you know up front. If they aren't, and you still decide to pursue it, it's your own fault. You knew she was being cryptic and contradictory from the start, but yet you're surprised when she plays games? Please.
Some men do it, some women do it. Stop generalizing about one sex. I've dated guys who were "the bad boy" and definitely broken. It sucked. Not everyone wants that. Some of us are in relationships with guys who are nice, smart, confident, respectful, etc. /endrant
The difference here is that your female friends may see them as reasonable life adjustments to help their men transition into adulthood.
Their male partners may not agree these changes are necessary, and well, theres that word again, "change". Which is still exactly what theyre doing, even if its with good intent.
There it is right there.
I could have told all of you this, but I was waiting for a woman to say it.
I think the problem is that the word change has such a negative connotation. It doesn't have to be bad. And sometimes it would have happened anyway, regardless of whether the woman were involved or not.
It's just frustrating to hear that general opinion of women is that we're totally incapable of being satisfied with another human being; that we're control freaks who want nothing more than to go from man to man, making him "better." Especially when I'm not one of those women, nor are many of my friends.
Exactly. Like every single person on this planet has preferences for food, colors, basses, etc. it's going to be the same with what you want out of a relationship.
Well, I certainly dont hold that opinion of women.
I may be just a bit jaded at present, but I certainly dont think all women are as youve layed out there (taken from the opinions of others, I know). This thread is filled with more anecdotal experience to truly be of any use in forming an opinion or a better understanding of women.
Its not that the word 'change' carries a negative connotation, so much as that 90% of the population (my own estimate) is resistant to change. People like comfort, and it takes some people a long while to become comfortable with who they are. The thing about a woman changing a man (or vice versa, because that happens too) is that true change (read: growth) has to come from within. One cant just be told to behave a certain way, or to do things differently if they dont make sense to the individual. When it would have happened anyway, thats when the individual was ready for it, and to try and force, push, encourage, et al that change before the person is ready will only lead to disasterous results.
This book Im about to recommend is not specifially about relationships, its about the way humans think and perceive and how there are multiple stages of growth in regards to consciousness. I highly recommend it for anyone who wants a better understanding of society and how we interact with each other. The book is calle 'A Theory of Everything', by Ken Wilber.
Let's try Ben Harper's take on this again,
Ben Harper - The Way You Found Me - Live Concert Diffusé Sur Europe 2TV on Vimeo
Ben Harper - The Way You Found Me - Live Concert Diffusé Sur Europe 2TV on Vimeo
Oh boy, the locker room effect is on full display again. This thread is a perfect answer to this question.
- Jan 27, 2010
- 4,141
- 471
- Disclosures
- Endorsing Artist: Genz Benz Amplification
MakiSupaStar said:+1. This was my first thoughts, but I will say this. She is giving you clear signals that she's keeping her options open and that a romp in the hay is not off the table, unless she likes doing it on the table, especially a pool table, sometimes a dining table, or a kitchen table once in awhile. She doesn't strike me as a coffee table type, usually there's a couch nearby those tables. What were we talking about again?
Oh yeah chicks. Listen this article was written to perpetuate the myths. Matticus was right in one regard, chick's rely on emotion more than logic, and I'll even go as far as to say that sometimes they misinterpret them as sexual attraction. But there is one constant the generally works, they ALL crave attention. It's not the 'type' of guy. That's what this article wants you to believe.
Nice guys or to be more specific guys that have been relegated to the dreaded 'friend zone' never get laid because chicks don't value their attention. It's always there when they want it because a dude in the friend zone is always available, always there to listen, and NEVER regulates the amount of attention they give to these chicks. Chicks want what they can't have, and it's not the bad guy, or complicated artist, or the good looking guy. They want the attention from the guy that's not giving them attention. Attention is a chicks crack. They hoard it, collect it, covet it, dream about it, and get off on it.
I have a joke with a buddy of mine. How do you get laid by a blonde chick? Tell her you're into brunettes. How do you get laid by a brunette? Tell her you're into blondes? You want to know why I love sexy Asian chicks? Because you get laid by telling them you're into sexy Asian chicks.
Seriously though. If you want avoid the friend zone and always be a consideration for a chick learn how to regulate the attention you give her. Upon first meeting her, make her laugh, half joke half be serious about how hot she is, etc etc, and let her get used to the attention. If she doesn't put out, remove your attention. Sometimes this is such a shock to a chick they might have sex with you just to get your attention back even when they had no inclination of having sex with you in the first place.
So gentlemen, don't let me hear you talk about not being the bad guy, or her 'type' again. Control her crack. Regulate your attention. My two cents
Oh and Matticus. Tap that multiple times. Repeatedly. Wear a jimmy.
This is pretty accurate in my experience.
Mine too, I've had it work when I wasn't even trying to apply it.
Its nice when after an hour or two of no luck at a party, that cute chick you chatted up when you first got there then got distracted and forgot about suddenly shows up on your lap wanting to go somewhere a little bit "quieter."
