A thread for with which to vent.

[edpal]

Your peepee is hanging out. Fix that and in on board with your views.

Stop taking surreptitious glances at your urinal buddies and you'll never know.

 

[fraublugher]

I was glad it took so long for me to hit the floor from where I fell. I was somehow able to right myself and land standing from a head first fall. I kind of shattered most everything below my hips, but that's better than being a veg for life.

Best theory I heard was --Life flashing before your eyes --is your brain scanning for a memory of --what the
solution is/what to do.
Were you a gymnast in your past?

 

[Immigrant]

Best theory I heard was --Life flashing before your eyes --is your brain scanning for a memory of --what the
solution is/what to do.
Were you a gymnast in your past?

Maybe, because I didn't get my monthly visit until I was in my twenties.

After the first few weeks (once I was out of the morphine induced haze) I had a lot of time to wonder how it happened. Not why, how. The brain* is a weird thing.


*I usually use "brains" for comedic value, but refrained. Don't know why.

 

[Gorn]

Stop shutting down human-operated cash registers at the supermarket and adding self checkout registers. I put in my time as a cashier when I was a teenager. If you want me to ring up my own groceries than give me a discount. I don't work for you anymore, waldbaums.

 

[Darth Handsome]

Stop shutting down human-operated cash registers at the supermarket and adding self checkout registers. I put in my time as a cashier when I was a teenager. If you want me to ring up my own groceries than give me a discount. I don't work for you anymore, waldbaums.

Self check-out eliminates the stickiness of intense scrutiny when stocking up on condoms & cough syrup, no?

 

[tastybasslines]

Self check-out eliminates the stickiness of intense scrutiny when stocking up on condoms & cough syrup, no?

Not really. You have to put them on that scale, right out in the open with all the regular checkouters walking by. I agree with Gorn.

 

[ChrisB2]

^ try going thru u-scan with even less-noble marital enhancements, thinking you'll sneak through, and getting IDd by a 19 y.o. boy because it's a "controlled substance"... AFTER you've turned 50.... Aye yiyi..

Amazon is my friend...

 

[machine gewehr]

Best theory I heard was --Life flashing before your eyes --is your brain scanning for a memory of --what the
solution is/what to do.
Were you a gymnast in your past?

That seems possible and it's cool.

It feels like every single neuron gets fired up in a very short period of time, you can't see everything clearly as it's right out there in that moment, it's more of a blur.

 

[FilterFunk]

You look great in those heels.

For the record, I was referring to things like t-shirts, caps, and jerseys. Anything else would amount to unsubstantiated rumor (as far as you know).

 

[Darth Handsome]

For the record, I was referring to things like t-shirts, caps, and jerseys. Anything else would amount to unsubstantiated rumor (as far as you know).

Of course of course.

Btw, your slip is showing.

 

[FilterFunk]

Of course of course.

Btw, your slip is showing.

Thanks for the heads-up, Darth...

I mean, good one! That was funny....yeah, like I'd be wearing a slip. No way!

 

[Gorn]

Texting and driving is bad. I submit exhibit A:

She was texting...not me.

 

[fraublugher]

Your wife phoned a lamp pole ?

 

[Gorn]

Your wife phoned a lamp pole ?

Nope, the beautiful 19 year old girl sideswiped me whilst texting. It was hard to get mad at her.

 

[Darth Handsome]

Nope, the beautiful 19 year old girl sideswiped me whilst texting. It was hard to get mad at her.

Did you challenge her to a fight to the death? (cue Star Trek Duel Theme....)

 

[Gorn]

Did you challenge her to a fight to the death? (cue Star Trek Duel Theme....)

No but soft, dreamy music played and her face was lit in a fuzzy white light accentuating her eyes when she got out of the car.

 

[Darth Handsome]

No but soft, dreamy music played and her face was lit in a fuzzy white light accentuating her eyes when she got out of the car.

What's her phone number?

 

[Gorn]

What's her phone number?

867-5309

 

[adi77]

i hate the b@#$@*d luggage guys at airports who throw our hard earned gear around like it was cattle fodder.. they f%g suckkkkkk.. and planes with ridiculous leg space and shady event organizers.. they all sooo suck

 

[fraublugher]

Nope, the beautiful 19 year old girl sideswiped me whilst texting. It was hard to get mad at her.

I was rear-ended by a gal in crutches driving a stick once , dang nearly lost my appetite.