I found this one entertaining just because of the blatant lack of any punctuation, coupled with the monumental grammar mistakes.
doh...
doh...
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Dumb Craig's List Ads thread
- Thread starter NickInMesa
- Start date
- Status
Here's a few from Atlanta this week:
Unreal guitarist (Moreland)
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Date: 2009-09-23, 12:05PM EDT
Reply to: see below
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You only need one ad to prove that you are a wanker, not three.
Location: Moreland
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
We need a bassist!!! (douglasville)
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Date: 2009-09-23, 2:12AM EDT
Reply to: [email protected] [Errors when replying to ads?]
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FIRST OF ALL:
we are a melodic deathcore band. (but not a stereotypical one) so if you dont play this music, leave now.
We need a bassist who doesnt just always follow the rhythm, you need to be able to write your own bass lines, and help write on other instruments also.
You need to be dedicated, have a ride, have your own equipment, be chill, and be GOOD at what you do
we are not some chump local band (though the only recordings we have are very misleading(old vocalist, and crappy video quality)) so dont think this is just to have fun, we are 100% serious with everything we do.
we should be recording as soon as possible, and have shows by november
Unreal guitarist (Moreland)
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Date: 2009-09-23, 12:05PM EDT
Reply to: see below
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You only need one ad to prove that you are a wanker, not three.
Location: Moreland
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
We need a bassist!!! (douglasville)
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Date: 2009-09-23, 2:12AM EDT
Reply to: [email protected] [Errors when replying to ads?]
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FIRST OF ALL:
we are a melodic deathcore band. (but not a stereotypical one) so if you dont play this music, leave now.
We need a bassist who doesnt just always follow the rhythm, you need to be able to write your own bass lines, and help write on other instruments also.
You need to be dedicated, have a ride, have your own equipment, be chill, and be GOOD at what you do
we are not some chump local band (though the only recordings we have are very misleading(old vocalist, and crappy video quality)) so dont think this is just to have fun, we are 100% serious with everything we do.
we should be recording as soon as possible, and have shows by november
We get that around here, too - the ad will say "Fender' when it's a Squier Affinity, and then a bunch of over-caffeinated folks post a zillion 'ads' chewing the seller out for mis-representing etc. and take up 5 times as much space as the original offending ad did, and then other people chime in with the 'he didn't know better, don't hate on him...' defense and soak up more space...downward spiral, downward spiral etc etc. I thought CL had moderators...
That one gave me a headache from reading it...
It's rare that I look through Craigslist, but this one gave me quite a laugh! Enjoy...
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Bald Guitarist and Drummer starting Hair Band (Nassau)
Lead Guitarist / lead singer and drummer looking for bass player and rthythm guitarist for Heavy Metal Hair Band. We plan on doing the best of Poison, Ratt, Bon Jovi, and all of the other great Hair bands from the 80's. We have the skills and the showmanship to kill on Long Island and New York City. The only thing we lack is the actual hair. We've tried Rogaine, Lard, Pomagranite Juice, Mothballs, Cat Urine, and all of the other common remedies. We are a little short on cash right now so transplants are out of the question. If we can get the band together and working, we could pool all of the money to get us on the Highway to Hair.
What we need is to get two strong musicians who wouldn't mind playing for free for the first $20,000.00 the band makes so we can get the hair we need. We would then split any paydays equally from that point on. We plan on using wigs for the time being. The drummer can borrow his father's toupe on weekends and I have one of those multicolor wigs that you sometimes see on guys at football games. One thing that we must insist on is that any new member of the band have the required hair otherwise it could be years before we actually make any money gigging if you need transplants too.
Let's conquer the world with our hair blowing in the wind and rock out!
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Bald Guitarist and Drummer starting Hair Band (Nassau)
Lead Guitarist / lead singer and drummer looking for bass player and rthythm guitarist for Heavy Metal Hair Band. We plan on doing the best of Poison, Ratt, Bon Jovi, and all of the other great Hair bands from the 80's. We have the skills and the showmanship to kill on Long Island and New York City. The only thing we lack is the actual hair. We've tried Rogaine, Lard, Pomagranite Juice, Mothballs, Cat Urine, and all of the other common remedies. We are a little short on cash right now so transplants are out of the question. If we can get the band together and working, we could pool all of the money to get us on the Highway to Hair.
What we need is to get two strong musicians who wouldn't mind playing for free for the first $20,000.00 the band makes so we can get the hair we need. We would then split any paydays equally from that point on. We plan on using wigs for the time being. The drummer can borrow his father's toupe on weekends and I have one of those multicolor wigs that you sometimes see on guys at football games. One thing that we must insist on is that any new member of the band have the required hair otherwise it could be years before we actually make any money gigging if you need transplants too.
Let's conquer the world with our hair blowing in the wind and rock out!
Just found this on in the Atlanta CL. Not really dumb,just funny. [Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
Fender Ibenez P-Bass NEW - $150 (mooresville)
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Date: 2009-09-23, 11:17PM EDT
Reply to: [email protected] [Errors when replying to ads?]
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Brand new bought it 3 months ago. never played. black an white with wood neck. playes good. no amp, just bass an fender case. need to sell asap call 330-843-3534 ask for devin or email [email protected]
Fender Ibenez P-Bass NEW - $150 (mooresville)
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Date: 2009-09-23, 11:17PM EDT
Reply to: [email protected] [Errors when replying to ads?]
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Brand new bought it 3 months ago. never played. black an white with wood neck. playes good. no amp, just bass an fender case. need to sell asap call 330-843-3534 ask for devin or email [email protected]
Good thing it does not, otherwise it would not be such a source of free entertainment.
This was passed along on my local CL:
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
Esteban Vintage Collectors Edition with Amp. It is Acoustic or Electric, It is beautiful with Mother of pearl around the outside paid $1000.00 Comes with CD of Esteban secrets and ways of playing the guitar. MUST SELL son has been wanting to take lessons but unfortantely I am fighting a custody battle and I need the money to fight in court. Please all serious inquires only. Guitar has barely been played but is tuned. Please call 352-277-xxxx if interested. Thank you
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
Esteban Vintage Collectors Edition with Amp. It is Acoustic or Electric, It is beautiful with Mother of pearl around the outside paid $1000.00 Comes with CD of Esteban secrets and ways of playing the guitar. MUST SELL son has been wanting to take lessons but unfortantely I am fighting a custody battle and I need the money to fight in court. Please all serious inquires only. Guitar has barely been played but is tuned. Please call 352-277-xxxx if interested. Thank you
OMG it never ceases t amaze me.....
MORE Vintage Gear for sale - $9000 (portland)
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Date: 2009-09-24, 6:14PM PDT
Reply to: [email protected] [Errors when replying to ads?]
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Lets see.... I have 8 tube amps from the 50's and 60's for $6000. Some don't work.
I have 9 guitars, $5000, some need strings.
I have 23 8-track players, $2000, some need belts,
I have over 800 8-tracks in boxes, $4000 some may not play.
Oh, and SEVERAL old guitar pics, $1000, very light use.
No offers, Not sold seperately, no trades, just looking for a quick single cash sale. These things are collectible, and are clearly worth more than what I'm asking. And I also couldn't be bothered to list each one on craigslist.
This is a total deal. You won't be dissappointed. Espesially with the guitar pics.
You think I got time to post pictures, get real. Email for incomplete list.
Location: portland
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 1391119059
crack is a terrible thing...
of course he is probably serious....even more scary
peace capt Kirk
MORE Vintage Gear for sale - $9000 (portland)
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Date: 2009-09-24, 6:14PM PDT
Reply to: [email protected] [Errors when replying to ads?]
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Lets see.... I have 8 tube amps from the 50's and 60's for $6000. Some don't work.
I have 9 guitars, $5000, some need strings.
I have 23 8-track players, $2000, some need belts,
I have over 800 8-tracks in boxes, $4000 some may not play.
Oh, and SEVERAL old guitar pics, $1000, very light use.
No offers, Not sold seperately, no trades, just looking for a quick single cash sale. These things are collectible, and are clearly worth more than what I'm asking. And I also couldn't be bothered to list each one on craigslist.
This is a total deal. You won't be dissappointed. Espesially with the guitar pics.
You think I got time to post pictures, get real. Email for incomplete list.
Location: portland
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 1391119059
crack is a terrible thing...
of course he is probably serious....even more scary
peace capt Kirk
This is the same guy who was selling the world's coolest amp* a few pages back...
*it has an accordion jack...apparently.
But he has picks and everyone knows that lightly used picks bring in mad cash.
Actually, he said he has...
...which is even better...or something...I think. Maybe. Or not. One or the other.capt. Kirk said:
This one is freaking hilarious!!!!
I have a 22 string guitar my uncle gave me from when he visited India. It's from the 60s or something, and it's really weird and I don't know how to play it. I would learn but I just turned 16 and I want to collect swords and buy a car. So I want to to sell this. So that I can buy a sword. With the money you gave me from the guitar that you buy from me. The picture is of a different guitar, not the same one, but it pretty much looks the same as the one in the picture that I posted on the website. Also I posted a picture of this banjo. Because it sounds a lot like a banjo, so you can see better what it sounds like. Thank you!
Location: central austin
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
I have a 22 string guitar my uncle gave me from when he visited India. It's from the 60s or something, and it's really weird and I don't know how to play it. I would learn but I just turned 16 and I want to collect swords and buy a car. So I want to to sell this. So that I can buy a sword. With the money you gave me from the guitar that you buy from me. The picture is of a different guitar, not the same one, but it pretty much looks the same as the one in the picture that I posted on the website. Also I posted a picture of this banjo. Because it sounds a lot like a banjo, so you can see better what it sounds like. Thank you!
Location: central austin
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
Typical. He wants to sell an instrument for more than it costs and of course adds a sob story for good measure.
Like these guys selling an old Lowrey organ (the same as the one I got for $25) for hundreds or even thousands of dollars. Once in a while they hook an idiot.
Like these guys selling an old Lowrey organ (the same as the one I got for $25) for hundreds or even thousands of dollars. Once in a while they hook an idiot.
Bass isn't that hard ...
Bass/guitar player looking for PUNK Band
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Date: 2009-09-18, 9:21PM CDT
Reply to: [email protected] [Errors when replying to ads?]
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24 year old looking to form/join punk rock band. I havent practiced in awhile....but bass isn't that hard...I can get the job done. I've been n bands before and have experience performing and recording.
... Every stereotype we try to fight
Bass/guitar player looking for PUNK Band
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Date: 2009-09-18, 9:21PM CDT
Reply to: [email protected] [Errors when replying to ads?]
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24 year old looking to form/join punk rock band. I havent practiced in awhile....but bass isn't that hard...I can get the job done. I've been n bands before and have experience performing and recording.
... Every stereotype we try to fight - Status
