Dumbest Rhyme Guilty Pleasure

[jacksplat]

I don't want to eat a pickle, i just want to ride my motorcycle. 'nuff said.

 

[Obese Chess]

the third song I ever wrote, in high school, I rhymed
"Let's skip school and slit our wrists,
Pierce your tongue and [infamously elusive part of the female anatomy]"

 

[morgansterne]

Probably Weird Al's parody "Six Words Long."
This song's got nothing to say
But I'm recording it anyway
I know if I put my mind to it
i know I can find a good rhyme here

 

[deernaes]

My pet peeve is using the same word two lines in a row.
Most notoriously;
Generals gathered in their masses
Just like witches at black masses

 

[capnjim]

I like how Coldplay rhymes bones with beautiful.

 

[BillyBA]

Somewhere, somehow somebody
Must have kicked you around some
Who knows, maybe you were kidnapped
Tied up, taken away and held for ransom
-- Tom Petty

 

[Rum Ham]

Mostly the gibberish from Anthony Keidis on ‘Around the World’
Nee nay no go you
Nee nay to go you nay

 

[vvvmmm]

"Baby, baby, maybe next week
'cuz you see I'm on a losing streak"

"I've been from Tucson to Tucumcari
Tehachapi to Tonapah
Driven every kind of rig that's ever been made
Driven the back roads so I wouldn't get weighed"

(I happen to love both but they are awkward, the first for the pun - might as well sing, "Brown Sugar" or "Midnight Rambler" if you wanna offend yer girl - and the second because, who knows the latter three places, much less can easily remember how to say 'em.)

 

[dalkowski]

Reportedly, producer Todd Rundgren made fun of Andy Partridge for rhyming "umbilical" with "cycle" in the song 'Season Cycle' from XTC's classic album Skylarking. But the lyric was kept.

View attachment 4007770

Great lyric, great LP.

 

[Killing Floor]

Most of “Blinded by the Light?” The Springsteen version, of course. I’ve always said my favorite thing about that song is all the goofy rhymes.

OK, that's a great song. But my secretly favorite thing is all the "wrong" lyrics people sing to that song.

 

[Pdaddy1978]

Roses are red, and violets are purple...
Sugar is sweet, and so is maple slurple....

The genius of Rodger Miller.

 

[Killing Floor]

Not to derail, but....

I can't tell you how many country songs have some sort of line about keeping beer or moonshine or wine "under the seat of my pickup truck".

Now, I grew up redneck. I still have redneck tendencies. I have logged hundreds of thousands of miles in pickup trucks. I have never, EVER, considered storing beer under the seat of a pickup. That's just about the worst place I can think of to store beer for a whole host of reasons. I have also been to plenty of redneck parties, and I have yet to see a girl dancing "up on the tailgate of that pickup truck" either. Can you imagine a drunk girl in heels dancing on that uneven surface?

(The third line in the trifecta of bro country cliché's is something about "Daisy Dukes". That one is pretty accurate.)

I love a good pickup truck. I drive one to this day. But even with their long list of uses, dancefloor and beer storage aren't there.

Rifle prop? Tree removal? Dirt hauler? Bass boat tow machine? Daughter's boyfriend chaser? Yep.

Dancing and beer storage are dumb.

I know the feeling, you round one of those curves, like on 129, and the bottle slides to the back and you can't reach it. You try to pump the brakes to make it roll forward but nothing helps. Only to get it back it to park the truck. But then you can use the seatbelt for a bottle opener.

 

[vvvmmm]

'I didn't believe she was devil's sperm
She said, "Curse you all, you'll never learn!"'

And I read some where you should only "use the seatbelt for a bottle opener" after yer teeth ain't work no more.

 

[Obese Chess]

Mostly the gibberish from Anthony Keidis on ‘Around the World’
Nee nay no go you
Nee nay to go you nay

You mean you haven't been seduced by sultry lines like "ooooooh, ticky-ticky-tackity-tic-tac-toe / i know, everybody's eskimo?"

I think my favorite rap line was 2Mex in Busdriver's "The Truth About Spontaneous Human Combustion" where after an incredibly complex, convoluted, multi-syllabic rhyme he just snarls "Charlton Heston is a b***h / I pulled a rifle on him and he didn't do sh**"

 

[jmlee]

Happened to be listening to Buck Owens today and “rhymed” Adam and eleven.

 

[Nev375]

There's this gem from Sling Blade: (I'd post a clip, but it's laced with profanities)



I stand on the hill, not for a thrill

But for a breath of a fresh kill

And

Never mind the man who contemplates

Doin’ away with license plates

He stands alone, anyhow

Baking the cookies of discontent

By the heat of the laundromat vent

Leaving his soul …

partin’ the waters

of the medula oblongata

of

Mankind

 

[dadglasser]

Neil Diamond, I am I Said:

“I am,” I said!
To no one there!
And no one heard at all
Not even a chair"

 

[Pdaddy1978]

There's this gem from Sling Blade: (I'd post a clip, but it's laced with profanities)



I stand on the hill, not for a thrill

But for a breath of a fresh kill

And

Never mind the man who contemplates

Doin’ away with license plates

He stands alone, anyhow

Baking the cookies of discontent

By the heat of the laundromat vent

Leaving his soul …

partin’ the waters

of the medula oblongata

of

Mankind

You'all get f@%# out
Out!
You too Randy....I mean it!

 

[dadglasser]

Sting, Ella Fitzgerald, and others: Nice Work if You Can Get It:

... the only work that really brings enjoyment
Is the kind that is for girl and boy meant​

 

[hbarcat]

From the song, "War Pigs" by Black Sabbath:

Generals gathered in their masses
Just like witches at black masses

Ozzy made a rhyme of two homonyms.