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Escaping the "Friends Zone"

N

nathan

Jul 16, 2004
252
0
#1
I know there have been posts on this before, but I can honestly say I didn't really understand what it was like to be in the "Friends Zone" with girls until now. I thought I should post it in my own words I guess, haha.

Anyway...

This year i've been in so many situations with girls where I don't know what to do. Just last night, I went out with some friends and a girl that I really like a lot but have just been friends with for a couple months. After everybody dispersed she invited me back to her place to watch a movie.

I felt so awkward because I did not know what to do. I kept second guessing myself. Should I sit and watch the movie in silence, joking around a bit here and there? Should I put my arm around her? Kiss her? How?

How have you guys handled these types of situations? Any advice would be good!
 
#8
Relic said:
It's simple.
Stop worrying and just act like the stud you are. Think of yourself as this smooth studly sort of guy and do what HE would do. It works like a charm. You'll thank me
Click to expand...

"Instead of tuna salad and being intimidated by women, chicken salad and going right up to them."

Try George Costanza's "Opposite Theory".

Just do the opposite of all your normal instincts.
 
#9
You don't know that you're in the friend zone, she might have been opening the doorway you fool. Next time look for signals, and if you go for it and she says "no just friends" then be like "not gonna happen, sorry, there's a physical attraction there on top of the friendship" and if that means you gotta leave, then so be it. You have to be willing to sacrifice the friendship for the relationship, even if it means having neither in the immediate future.
 
#10
Next "movie night", offer to bring the popcorn. Put it in one of those paper movie popcorn tubs. Then cut a hole in the bottom and put "the little general" in there. Sit down with it on your lap and wait for her to discover your clever ruse.

I don't know how it could fail.
 
#11
Good advice from SOME people, thanks. I do try and look for signs but it's hard. Like I said, I keep second guessing. She'll won't sit THAT close to me and I'll take that as I sign to not pursue it or something like that....
 
#13
Girls wont make things obvious, ever. Don't expect the obvious signals you're looking for. Stop second guessing. You also can't be nervous and "just go for it" because it'll be too awkward. You have to be confident in yourself, and keep your insides calm, you need to tell yourself that it doesn't matter if it goes well or not, and you don't care what happens. Then just enjoy yourself. You have to be the same with with your words as well. It's hard, but you take it one step at a time. You should both enjoy your time together.
 
#15
Let me see if I got this straight.

You go out with friends.

Cute cold weather Babe invites fully equipped
testosterone laden studly he-man back
to her cozy little place to 'watch movie'.

You wander around in mental circle pondering what to do.

Babe thinks she is unattractive cause you don't seem to
want to hit the target.

Man, youth is wasted on young people.

Hasn't Maki taught you ANYTHING here?
 
#16
nathan said:
Good advice from SOME people, thanks. I do try and look for signs but it's hard. Like I said, I keep second guessing. She'll won't sit THAT close to me and I'll take that as I sign to not pursue it or something like that....
Click to expand...

You're not listening young padwan... stop worrying about signs, signals and so on. What do YOU want? Do you want sit close to her etc etc? Then do it. Become the stud you are and stop overthinking and overanalyzing.
 
#18
Alright, you want some real advice?

Here's the deal. She's already decided if she would be interested in dating you or not. If she is, there will be subtle signs.

Does she play with her hair when she's around you? Does she lean in when you are talking? Does she smile a lot? Does she seem to remember a number of things you've said in previous conversations?

Here's another easy way to know. Call her up out of the blue to talk a bit and then casually mention that you're thinking of getting something to eat and if she's interested in going.

If a woman is into you, she'll clear her schedule to go do something. If you get a polite brush off then you know where you stand.
 

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