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Farting during a show

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#181
Best I've seen was in Auckland airport, New Zealand. We were in the departure area waiting to get out of that damn country (Im an Australian) and this guy had just gotten off the plane in the terminal next to us, and as he moved to the elevator in the group we heard this ENORMOUS fart, and he stuck his hand up and claimed it.

It was hilarious. After he claimed it, I yelled "Nice one mate, don't want that on the plane, terrorism and stuff", and he burst out laughing.

Good times.
 
#184
Actually I have a new story related to the GTG we had here in the DC area. Gard, Jammadave, Dr. Phunkypants and I went out for Sushi. Well something got inside me and it had to come out. It went in as fish, but came out as a mudshark. Anyway, while I was waiting in the hallway for the bathroom to open up I let out an "oracle fart". I call it that because it is a sign of what is to come. No need to go further...ah, why not. A mudshark was released, and after I used the bathroom Dr PP went to use it afterwards. He was hit by the stench of the mudshark, and witnessed it's spawn lingering in the "pool".

After sushi, we hung out in front of the shop and everyone released a ripper. A "call and response" sort of thing. One after the other round-robin style. Everyone except me. Unfortunately, I left all my fumes at the Sushi bar.
 
#189
Folmeister said:
And, mind you, there was a late 19th-century performer, Lepetomaine(sp?) whose sole act consisted of farting. He could whistle tunes, do birdcalls, and blow out candles. He was a very successful performer.
Click to expand...

That clearly is fake research - anybody with a smidgen of higher fart education knows that farts don't precisely blow candles "out". Turn them into blowtorchs more like it :D
 
#191
Mark Latimour said:
Why is it that when you are at the urinals and someone in the urinal next to you lets rip with an absolute paint peeler, that you cant even laugh or raise an eyebrow? Sometimes im struggling to keep myself from bursting out laughing, but some kind of toilet protocol says you cant laugh at farts in the head.

I dont get it!
Click to expand...
LMAO!
 
#192
Seriously guy's.....best thread EVER!!! I just laughed for 15 min. straight.
My fart story isn't bass related,.... I was attending my newborn neice's baptism, My whole family was there, And my brother-in-law's family as well (all devout catholics). Everything was going really smoothly, camcorders running , grandmother's crying, I was standing right by my mother who was tear filled. I felt something perculating down there, right when i started to take notice of the rumblings the gas expanded in my stomach like yeast.....Now, when this happened i KNEW i was gonna float one. I was holding on as hard as i could but to no avail.... I figured i could maybe mute it and make it unnoticable by squeezing it out slowly...didn't work! It just ended up sounding like someone clapping, even phased the preist who looked right at me, and whats worse it just made it last longer, so while i'm letting go my mom is pinching arm, the preist and my sister are giving me the ol' look... I had no choice but to exit the building, poppin little farts off with just about every step on the way out. My stomach was really sick at this point.
I actually felt bad about the whole thing, but a few minutes later my wife who was video taping the ceremony came out to the car, and busted OUT laughing. And one right after another my family came out of the church laughing.. And the other side of the family was just giving us dirty looks...My mother informed me that the chapel was tainted with my foul stench, and that i was pure evil, LOL. Funny yet not funny
 
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#193
sotua said:
That clearly is fake research - anybody with a smidgen of higher fart education knows that farts don't precisely blow candles "out". Turn them into blowtorchs more like it :D
Click to expand...

>>> I think it depends on the methane content and force of the flatulent emission. Check out Mr. Methane blowing out
candles, as well as performing a few tunes from his vast repertoire of controlled anal voicings.
Invalid Link Removed

Slug
 
#198
This thread is killing me!!! :p

wow...i had no idea this thread even existed!

In salute to flatulence I just squeezed one out at my desk at work...Now I must run away before someone passes by my area and suspects me to be the dirty bird... :hiding: :cool:
 
#199
I tried suppressing a strong one at a gig on stage one time and it forced its way out past my mightly clenched butt cheeks only to have a high pitched trumpet like tone to it. It was a big enough stage for me to not share the stench with anyone but the sound did project over my microphone and there were people questioning my keyboard player afterwards about the note he played on his synth that sounded like a trumpet that was not at all in tune with the rest of the band.
 
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#200
KeithPas said:
I tried suppressing a strong one at a gig on stage one time and it forced its way out past my mightly clenched butt cheeks only to have a high pitched trumpet like tone to it. It was a big enough stage for me to not share the stench with anyone but the sound did project over my microphone and there were people questioning my keyboard player afterwards about the note he played on his synth that sounded like a trumpet that was not at all in tune with the rest of the band.
Click to expand...


LMAO!
 
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