Finally...why am i not happy?

[john_g]

This is kind of what I'm hearing too, particularly with the part about wanting to bring in new material. The desire of musicians to stick with the old and familiar and not learn new material is a huge issue. When I hear "we're experienced" my mind immediately goes to "we are playing the songs we learned 30 years ago and we think that's all that works." We see that mindset here over and over again with people who only want to play songs they think are safe, not realizing that there's a treasure trove of good music out there that is not overdone and that audiences will respond to. But I really can't say what's going on here. All I can really see is that the OP isn't happy with it and probably needs to move on.

My last post here as I said I cant keep up with the explaining and i was initially trying to be a little vague on purpose.

The setlist choice isnt me being resistant to change...im the one pushing to constantly add new stuff...any new stuff...as long as it was a big enough hit and can be played well by us. Setlist issues destroyed my previous 3 successful cover bands (mostly just never adding anything new or not having enough songs people like). The setlist issue for me is more of a case of poor choices, which is not exclusive to this singer. Ive noticed alot of musicians are not good at gauging what is working over time and what isnt. Minor hits or stuff that likely wont work well in the venues we play (most people there are 40+) isnt a great idea. I dont really care what we play as long as it works more often than not. The songs Ive been resistant to have usually been something that ive played in a previous band that did not go over at all, or a choice of something that i know wont work at most of the places we play. Could one of those songs surprise us and work? Sure. We had people dancing to 2112 Overture a couple of times in a previous band. But with so many to choose from, why try to force it?

Anyway, venting over. Thanks folks, Im off to practice singing =)

 

[BadSanta1281]

Every pack needs an alpha dog. Is that you?

You need to either lead, follow or set out on your own.

 

[LBS-bass]

My last post here as I said I cant keep up with the explaining and i was initially trying to be a little vague on purpose.

The setlist choice isnt me being resistant to change...im the one pushing to constantly add new stuff...any new stuff...as long as it was a big enough hit and can be played well by us. Setlist issues destroyed my previous 3 successful cover bands (mostly just never adding anything new or not having enough songs people like). The setlist issue for me is more of a case of poor choices, which is not exclusive to this singer. Ive noticed alot of musicians are not good at gauging what is working over time and what isnt. Minor hits or stuff that likely wont work well in the venues we play (most people there are 40+) isnt a great idea. I dont really care what we play as long as it works more often than not. The songs Ive been resistant to have usually been something that ive played in a previous band that did not go over at all, or a choice of something that i know wont work at most of the places we play. Could one of those songs surprise us and work? Sure. We had people dancing to 2112 Overture a couple of times in a previous band. But with so many to choose from, why try to force it?

Anyway, venting over. Thanks folks, Im off to practice singing =)

Thanks for clarifying. Yes, I would not expect to wow a crowd with 2112

 

[Chad Michael]

I do! i only play keys too (with hands and feet via midi pedals), sing backup, run the live sound, design all graphics/promotional material including FB and website, edit all the videos and multitrack audio from gigs (not every gig) and uh...got recurring gigs at several venues before COVID/new singer came in,....

You do a ton for the band, & deserve credit. And... remember: no one really appreciates what you do until you stop doing it.

When I was gigging steady, my goals were 3: 1) provide low-frequency content. 2) sing backing vox, 3) make sure we sounded good in the room (I ran the mix). Was really not into getting gigs, or writing set lists. Luckily we had a band member who stepped up and did a good job.

 

[fjbass78]

He is hinting at controlling the setlist...both songs and order. Im not cool with that.

Does this really matter? he's the one singing the songs. IMO, i'm okay with singer/singers picking a setlist, or finalizing it.

 

[fjbass78]

I do! i only play keys too (with hands and feet via midi pedals), sing backup, run the live sound, design all graphics/promotional material including FB and website, edit all the videos and multitrack audio from gigs (not every gig) and uh...got recurring gigs at several venues before COVID/new singer came in, but...thats it. Womp wahhhh

Anywhoo...thanks for all the responses. We will see how things work out going forward.

sounds to me like you have a lot on your plate already. why do you want to control it all?

 

[Sixgunn]

After 3 years of a revolving door of drummers and singers, we have finally put together a very talented cover band. New singer is a PR machine and knows all the contact people at venues and has got us a bunch of gigs set up already. Played our first and people were really complimentary.

Still...im not all that happy. It was great to gig again after COVID and I look forward to the others on the schedule, but its starting to feel like we are becoming the singers backup band. Me and guitarist kept this going for almost 3 years and truth be told, him and I have had several disagreements over that time. He can be difficult at times to work with and Im not even sure how i got this far in a band with him. We get along most of the time but he has surgically attached his lips to the singer buttocks since he can get gigs and hes a good singer. Drummer is new to the cover band world so he generally goes along with consensus.

I just see the singer slowly taking everything over with the guitarist in tow and Im not loving it. Im trying to be a team player so I have put in my opinions in a constructive way when I thought appropriate, but singer is a bit of a know it all when it comes to bands. Ive been playing and in bands longer than hes been alive and I dont agree with alot of his direction. I dont need or want to be in charge, but I have alot of experience to draw from, but its feeling like "singer knows best".

I plan on playing the rest of the gigs for sure, but it just stinks that we have a great band but Im not happy. Anyone else experience this?

Go with the flow. If the gigs are fun, roll with it because you're doing it right whoever is "in charge".

 

[Zoffy]

I'm sorry but I must be missing something.

This sounds like a great cover band gig. You show up, you play, you get paid (!), and you go home.

If you want artistic satisfaction, then maybe you need to form your own band, sing the songs, and do all the work.

This. You have the new guy who's well-connected and getting work for your band, which frees you up from doing all of the non-playing, tedious, contractual, glad-handing that most bands have to do. But, because you have been in the band longer, you seem to feel that you are being slighted. Enjoy the fact that you can focus on the playing and not the other stuff. If you don't like the direction the band is going or the new interpersonal dynamics, then quit. But the grass is not always greener. I recently quit a job where I felt under-appreciated for my hard work, only to find that I actually had it pretty good where I was at. That's a tough lesson to learn....

 

[Ekulati]

Unless you clearly tell a new front person who also happens to be a booking machine, "This is our band, our image is XYZ, THIS is who we are, we don't want that to change," up front, then it's natural that a talented, energetic, front person who makes the cash register ring consistently will shift the focus.

Your only concern is do you like that focus or not? (Also, can you keep this band and start your own side project?)

 

[Lowbrow]

I've gotten unhappy in good, sometimes successful bands for similar reasons.
Sometimes I've quit or I've stirred up conflict when I just should have gone along happily.
I'm almost 60 years old now and my band 'with aspirations' days are largely behind me.
What I've realized in retrospect--often to my great sadness--is that, while you as bassist may be a band's driving force, originator, businessperson, or de facto leader, the lead singer is almost always the focus, and if they are good they are PRECIOUS.
The lead singer is the band's delivery system. The bassist is a support player. Now, not Geddy, not McCartney, not Lemmy, not Lynnot -- but you understand the difference.
This is something I learned a little too late to save some potentially happening bands, or to save my place within said bands.

 

[39-Bassist]

I say (1-1/2 cents worth of course) keep playing in the band for the experience and hopefully $, and keep looking for another band to start or play in. Over the years it will be just another learning experience. Plus keep in touch with anyone in the band (if you get along with them), they could be a great reference or someone to call for a position sometime.

 

[TheReceder]

Be careful about hanging it up too quick.

Too many musicians end out calling it quits only to regret it years, if not months down the road.
Happiness can be short-lived, but regret lasts forever.

 

[dbsfgyd1]

After 3 years of a revolving door of drummers and singers, we have finally put together a very talented cover band. New singer is a PR machine and knows all the contact people at venues and has got us a bunch of gigs set up already. Played our first and people were really complimentary.

Still...im not all that happy. It was great to gig again after COVID and I look forward to the others on the schedule, but its starting to feel like we are becoming the singers backup band. Me and guitarist kept this going for almost 3 years and truth be told, him and I have had several disagreements over that time. He can be difficult at times to work with and Im not even sure how i got this far in a band with him. We get along most of the time but he has surgically attached his lips to the singer buttocks since he can get gigs and hes a good singer. Drummer is new to the cover band world so he generally goes along with consensus.

I just see the singer slowly taking everything over with the guitarist in tow and Im not loving it. Im trying to be a team player so I have put in my opinions in a constructive way when I thought appropriate, but singer is a bit of a know it all when it comes to bands. Ive been playing and in bands longer than hes been alive and I dont agree with alot of his direction. I dont need or want to be in charge, but I have alot of experience to draw from, but its feeling like "singer knows best".

I plan on playing the rest of the gigs for sure, but it just stinks that we have a great band but Im not happy. Anyone else experience this?

I hate to say this, you are the singer’s back up band. That’s your job. Nobody is showing up to see how well a bassist can hit the root of the one beat. You can be a entertaining as you want doing it, but the end of the show, most eyes (and ears) are on the singer or melody. Old story, still true.

If I’m not mistaking you, you have a proprietary bent on this situation so I understand your feelings and there is nothing wrong with that, considering your time and effort commitment over the years. Going forward, you have a tough decision to make and I don’t envy you in the least.

One, are you making enough money to make you live with the situation? Good. Grin and bear it. You want to be gigging anyway.

However, do you see a situation where you might get fired? Is it you feel like you’ve lost all control therefor have no interest in the project? There are other opportunities you’d rather work with. The answer yes to these would indicate you might need to be moving on.

 

[Ronzo]

Well, yes and no. He knows alot of venue owners and is alot younger/no kids so he has the time to get out and network that the rest of us dont. He is a good singer, amazing at networking, but I wouldnt say he is leading the way. He is talking us up to people he knows which is great, but we were gigging prior to COVID with other, lesser singers. I think the others are more willing to go along for a ride than i am. But in some ways you are right, do I want to gig alot with little to no input or find a band where Im not going to be butting heads all the time.

And, i admit, Im looking forward a little here based on how things have progressed. It may not end up being a total takeover, and or, we could work it out. Just, right now, im not as happy as I thought I would be.

Somebody needs to say some Inconvenient Truths here. So, here goes:

• The audience sees the front man as the reason they go to see the band. Like it or not, everyone else in the band is the supporting cast.
• “Best Supporting Actor” is the player of most of the solos. Or the second lead singer. This is the audience’s perception, again.
  
• The “I pledge allegiance… to the band… and I will not fight.. Mr. Schneebly… for creative control” bit in School Of Rock is something that resonates with all musicians. IMO, bands without a clearly defined leadership structure have a very difficult time staying afloat. Somebody ALWAYS has to subordinate their desires to others in the group. And, if the differences are too much to bear, it serves everyone best if the person who is most dissatisfied leaves.
  
• The person booking the gigs successfully is the one in charge. You want a change in direction? Book more gigs at higher pay per gig. Or stop complaining and continue to get paid. Venues and private party customers buy into the personality of the seller at the time of contract, and they want to deal with ONE “face of the band”.

 

[Gougedeye]

I plan on playing the rest of the gigs for sure, but it just stinks that we have a great band but Im not happy. Anyone else experience this?

What do you want your role to be in the band? Do you want to be the leader? If so, move on and form your own group. If that is not your thing, then reconcile that the singer and the guitar player are going to guide the direction of this band. Are you playing for fun or need? Certainly, express your opinion, however, if you do not want a leadership role in this band, be prepared to not be listen to.

 

[MDBass]

After 3 years of a revolving door of drummers and singers, we have finally put together a very talented cover band. New singer is a PR machine and knows all the contact people at venues and has got us a bunch of gigs set up already. Played our first and people were really complimentary.

Still...im not all that happy. It was great to gig again after COVID and I look forward to the others on the schedule, but its starting to feel like we are becoming the singers backup band. Me and guitarist kept this going for almost 3 years and truth be told, him and I have had several disagreements over that time. He can be difficult at times to work with and Im not even sure how i got this far in a band with him. We get along most of the time but he has surgically attached his lips to the singer buttocks since he can get gigs and hes a good singer. Drummer is new to the cover band world so he generally goes along with consensus.

I just see the singer slowly taking everything over with the guitarist in tow and Im not loving it. Im trying to be a team player so I have put in my opinions in a constructive way when I thought appropriate, but singer is a bit of a know it all when it comes to bands. Ive been playing and in bands longer than hes been alive and I dont agree with alot of his direction. I dont need or want to be in charge, but I have alot of experience to draw from, but its feeling like "singer knows best".

I plan on playing the rest of the gigs for sure, but it just stinks that we have a great band but Im not happy. Anyone else experience this?

Sounds to me like you need to decide if you want to be in charge of a band or have a successful band. Since this guy came in and is leading the way now and things are going better than before and you don’t like it, maybe you would rather be in charge of something yourself. If you really just wanted it to be successful and play a lot of gigs, you wouldn’t be unhappy.

I'm sorry but I must be missing something.

This sounds like a great cover band gig. You show up, you play, you get paid (!), and you go home.

If you want artistic satisfaction, then maybe you need to form your own band, sing the songs, and do all the work.

These two replies sum up the reality of the OP's situation pretty thoroughly.

Fighting for “creative control” over a cover band makes very little sense, since the entire business model is based around playing popular songs that no one in the band had any creative say in at all.

The OP describes a situation where all of the players are talented, the gig schedule is consistent, and the audiences love the show.

If the OP is unhappy with that, unless the band suddenly started covering an era or style of music that he loathes, it sounds like he’s more interested in being in charge of something than being in a working cover band.

That’s obviously fine, he just needs to be honest with himself about what he really wants.

 

[BobKos]

For the OP - I agree with the others that if it is on a successful path why introduce drama? I read so many posts where the other members of a band do NOTHING to build or promote a band. Apparently your singer is engaged and working (well) in this endeavor. Hate to say but I think you're butthurt and blowing this up. YOU will be the drama event in this band. If you feel displaced then move on. You would feel better if you embrace what is happening optimistically instead of with suspicion and animosity.

 

[fishdreams]

Most of the time in recent years i have done my own projects and/or composed the bulk of the music.

So I really appreciate the nowadays rare occasion that I actually just get to enjoy playing bass, and everything else being done by others.

Also, in a cover band scenario it feels pretty natural to me that the singer calls the shots in terms of setlist and repertoire. It doesn't matter to me if i agree or not, or how experienced they are-if they feel good and confident I'm gonna play a good show that goes over well. So I'll try and help them feel good and confident , even if sometimes against my 'better' judgement.

 

[Slough Feg Bass]

it's a cover band or a tribute band ? different situations.
Cover bands play lots of songs, and if singer dude has what it takes to do the work, put on a performance and sound good at a lot of songs, then what is the big deal ?
Yeah I've been in original bands where someone came into the fold and tried to change the direction of the music, but that is much more personal than choosing what order to play cover songs. If you don't like the stuff he wants to play, that is one thing, but if the crowd is digging it and you are getting paid, then let it ride!

 

[Eric Swaim]

Sometimes its hard to be in a band with all the ego's etc. Look at it like this, in a couple of years, no one is going to care. So go out and enjoy what you have today. If your not getting signed to a recording deal anytime soon it should not matter. Front men get all the attention anyway. If its bringing you the opportunity to play, ride that horse as long as you can.