Grabbed my ass!!!

Discussion in 'Bass Humor & Gig Stories [BG]' started by MattyO, Jan 3, 2014.

  1. MattyO


    Jan 3, 2014
    So as bizarre as this story is it's true. I played my first gig ever this new years eve and as i was half way into a kick ass punk rock set on my Schecter Model T 5 string i felt something touching me. Not just me but my ass, like a squeeze. I thought maybe it was a weird friend of mine who is into stupid jokey things of that nature. I am too but that's neither here not there. So anyway, I ignore it until it happens again and i turn around and there is some dude with his hand on my ass and he's just looking at me like "what's the deal?". What was i gonna do? Botch my first show because some loser decided to get too drunk and cop a feel? No i just killed him instead. But really i just played my ass off(figuratively) and had a great show. Later i told that guy that he shouldn't grab strange mens asses whilst they're playing music on stage but i don't think it registered. Anyway, that's my literal first gig story.

    EDIT GUYS! Someone took a video of it. About a third of the way through the song Johnny Johnny you can see this dude copping his feel then coming back for a second grab grab of my ace!
  2. punchdrunk

    punchdrunk Supporting Member

    Jun 22, 2013
    Jacksonville, Fl
    welcome to giggdom, MattyO....
  3. Stewie26

    Stewie26 Supporting Member

    Standard question on TB for a tread like this is: Was she hot....ah... I mean was he hot?
  4. Bassamatic

    Bassamatic keepin' the beat since the 60's Supporting Member

    Yeah. That is somewhat normal for bar gigs. Back in the day, I was playing on Rush street in Chicago for a summer. This wild bunch of good looking women would come in every Saturday night late (we played until 5 am!) and one of them would lean over the rail and try to grab me! I mentioned it to the DJ and she told me they were all men!! I asked how she knew and she pointed at one of them and said "That one is one of our bartenders!!!". Nothing seemed strange after that.

    Just take it as a compliment.
  5. Back when I was young and ripped we played a gay bar. It occupied a space that used to be a jewelry store, and over the bar was a giant sign which read 'Mounting in ten minutes, guaranteed.' I got WAY more attention than I wanted. That was real fun. Yeah.
  6. A girl in Boston a few weeks ago grabbed my junk while I was playing and fronting a Neon Trees tune. Helped me hit the high notes, but not exactly a classy maneuver in my book. At least wait til I'm off stage.
  7. seansbrew


    Oct 23, 2000
    Mesa AZ.
    Too funny, you did great by keeping your cool.

    Though I've never had that happen to me, I've run into and had interactions with some really obnoxious, weird, trippy, funny people.
  8. Hobobob

    Hobobob Don't feed the troll, folks.

    Jan 25, 2011
    Camarillo, CA
    I've been felt up a few times onstage, but mostly by middle-aged women. I must have "Cougar Bait" tattoo'ed on my backside somewhere.
  9. MattyO


    Jan 3, 2014
    You guys have some good stories. I think they all made me laugh. Thanks for the welcome!
  10. MattyO


    Jan 3, 2014
    Oh and he was not hot.
  11. Johnny Crab

    Johnny Crab ACME,QSC,Fame/Hondo/Greco user & BOSE Abuser Gold Supporting Member

    Feb 11, 2004
    South Texas
    In the spandex and long hair days, many things happened but they were always involving the females.
    No complaints either.
  12. MattyO


    Jan 3, 2014
    Well that's the ideal situation. Isn't it.
  13. two fingers

    two fingers Opinionated blowhard. But not mad about it. Gold Supporting Member

    Feb 7, 2005
    Eastern NC USA
    There's a "guy" here in town I always talk trash to. We've been friends for years. He'll get drunk and come up to me at the end of the night (keep in mind he is dressed as a woman) and say "Hey man. Let's have some fun. Introduce me to that guy. I'll see if I can get him interested and then" .......... well...... I really can't go into details. But it is all in good fun and nobody gets hurt.

    By the way, as a total hetero I can say without hesitation that the "guy" is pretty hot when he's all dolled up. He is good as gold on the inside.

    Anyhoo. Welcome to the wild world of interesting characters at shows Matty! It only gets better from here.

    And welcome to TalkBass! We're all nuts too!
  14. MattyO


    Jan 3, 2014
    I only wish i would've started gigging sooner. I could have way more stories and experience. But i guess you're never too old to start.
  15. A-Step-Towards

    A-Step-Towards Supporting Member

    Nov 16, 2009
    Los Angeles California
    "Dewy, did you just grab my ass?"
    "Sir from where I'm standing, it's a physical impossibility"
    "I know your tricks Dewy"
  16. MattyO


    Jan 3, 2014
  17. avvie


    Oct 12, 2010
    Maui, HI
    Nice ass, Matty! You must be working out!...
  18. nortonrider


    Nov 20, 2007
    I read the OP and immediately thought of this movie scene:
  19. I've been flashed and rubbed against on stage several times. (and they ask why I play in bands..... hehehe)I was sitting at a table during a break (with my wife) and this pretty hot girl parks herself in the seat across from me , pulls up her shirt and asks if I think she has a nice rack. I told her yes and looked at my wife and asked her if she thought the girl had a nice rack and she said yes too. The girl stayed around till the break was over talking to us ( pretty drunk but still somewhat coherent) Good thing the wife has been around this stuff for a while ( didn't seem to bother her a bit.) Just no telling what might happen at a bar gig.
  20. fhm555

    fhm555 So FOS my eyes are brown Supporting Member

    Feb 16, 2011
    And to think that in the boring, workaday world most folks live in, being accused of "playing grabass" has an entirely different meaning than it does in our wild, weird, wonderful world of live music in bars late at night.

    Welcome to the club my friend. Might as well enjoy the ride. Oh and BTW, while the pay may suck at least the hours are long and odd.

    Stay with it for a while and there is really no telling what you might see.