Grocery store behavior.

[Tituscrow]

Primus were awesome last night? Good to hear......I'm not a fan.

I'm just playing with you a bit.

Playing you right back

It was a test to see if you were ignoring me! But yep they/it were/was awesome.

No hard feelings, enjoyed the chat. Except that last chilling comment about 'Smokey'.

Cheers all.

 

[aborgman]

Ok. I concede that of course not all newborns are identical in the truest sense of the word, but surely that is the best point in their life where the nurture component can be dominant? A child may be born with any number of genetic conditions or with birth complications that can manifest themselves later as 'bad behaviour' and I in no way intend to trivialise this. But the truth is, that is with a tiny minority of children. I don't agree that we are born with personality traits as such, i believe we learn them. If a quick-tempered, violent mother gives birth, and her child is adopted into a calm, non-violent home, will it grow up quick-tempered and violent regardless? I guess it depends on what you define as a 'trait'

How many children do you have?

I have two - and their general behavior, temperament, attention spans, response to punishments, sleep behavior, etc. are NOTHING alike.

Same parents. Same home. Same family situation. Same parenting strategies and discipline plans.

TOTALLY different kids.

The home environment, for me, is a far more significant aspect of a childs development, and believe me, I've seen evidence of this day in, day out for 25 years in my job. But that's why it's called the nature/nurture 'debate', because there is no consensus either way. Individual experiences make you lean one way or the other.

BOTH are major contributors.

Your point about conflict resolution. Sounds like you mean 'win at no matter what cost or course of action', which for some involves smacking kids.

Sometimes not resolving the issue means your kid is dead. It's not 'win at no matter what cost', it's 'the cost of not winning is way more than the cost of winning'.

And yes, of course rationality and the ability to reason are learned. I just prefer to show my kids that the way to learn this is not with a thump from me if they play up.

Some problems need immediate resolution and waiting for the child to develop rationality isn't an option.

 

[PSPookie]

I'll just leave this here:
best ad ever

 

[rickenbaker]

With me I don't think I'd ever spank my kids. My dad did it to me when I was younger and i'm sure I deserved it (it was so long ago I can't remember). But I was always told, and I guess this comes from me having two younger sisters, that violence doesn't really solve anything or at least should be used as a last resort and so I carry that over into now. Not to say that I would never do it but I think I would try a lot of other methods beforehand

 

[RufusSPatches]

I remember going to the store once late at night and there was some guy there looking at cantalopes. He would shake it, then listen to it. Shake it, listen to it...
I have no idea what he was listening for.

I do the same thing. If the melon in question has any flesh-eating melon worms inside, then shaking the melon will irritate them and if you listen carefully, you will hear the little guys cursing your mother. This is how you know which melon NOT to buy!

 

[RufusSPatches]

If I acted up in public, my parents just quietly threatened to sell me into Chinese slave labor or put me out on the corner on garbage pick up day. it was quite effective! i really believed they were serious back then, now I KNOW they were!