How do I look like a real smooth jazz player?

[TripleDouble]

Water, sunsets, a soft focus lens and a vest.

 

[Mark_70]

Close your eyes while playing and look like it's really difficult.

Regards
Mark

 

[Mystic Michael]

Silk shirt, silk suit, silk underwear (feeling smoove is just as important as looking smoove). Hair gel. Expensive Italian loafers - but definitely no socks.

Be clean-shaven. Wear cologne.

MM

 

[markjazzbassist]

dress extremely fashionable for whatever was in style a decade ago. that should do.

 

[Amara]

Pink shirt, either buttoned down or with a popped collar. Dockers.

 

[fishdreams]

The one essential item is vaseline to smear on the photo/videographer's lens. Entirely up to you where to apply that vaseline elsewhere.

 

[Qlanq]

Turtle-neck sweater.
Try this grooming style to look like a complete bell end:
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I'm sure he is a nice bloke and everything but, really?

 

[Mr Gaston]

Practice being that cool.

What's that word they call people who practice being cool?

I'm pretty sure it's not "cool".

 

[Big Hoss]

A tie and dark glasses. Definitely need the pork-pie hat.

See Pork Pie hats scream Meth cook to me...

 

[ElMon]

Chuck Methgione

 

[ElMon]

I hope this thread goes 200 pages.

 

[katalyzt13]

zoot suit, pinstripe.

 

[zortation]

Well first thing is you gotta lose the cargo pants and birks...

 

[BassByBaldSteve]

Dress shirt with neck button open and sleeves rolled up to elbows, slightly loose tie (double-windsor knot), Vest/Waistcoat (bottom button open of course) with pocket watch (chain attached to center button), non-pleated slacks/trousers (never wear pleats under any circumstances), oxfords or brogues that match your belt, argyle socks just in case anyone notices, and possibly a cool-guy hat (avoid pork pie at all costs - that is Marcus's thing).

 

[jchrisk1]

Definitely a wrinkled pin stripe suit. And beat up leather shoes. And bags....under your eyes.

 

[someguyfromNC]

I've always thought Shaft looked pretty jazzy.

 

[loveandbass]

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[singlemalt]

Yeeeaassss!

 

[SAlcott]

6-string bass guitar up under your chin will do the trick.

 

[someguyfromNC]

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This is what happens if you mix John Mayer and a super happy victor wooten into one person