Is my friend a bad person?

[EatS1stBassist]

I joke around about the "hiding basses from the wife" thing here, but I'm actually straight up with her about such things (and yes: before the fact).

Could be I'm just lazy: like the cliche says: once you tell one lie, you'll have to cover it with another...and another...and another and it gets to be too much work remembering all those lies and keeping them straight. Much easier to remember what actually happened.

Plus, my wife's no dummy and after all these years, she can read me like a book.

Long story short: we don't lie to each other.

Do we?

Hon?

Lol?

 

[JeezyMcNuggles]

So my friend - I'll call him Bob - told his wife yesterday that he had to take one of his basses down to the shop to have some work done on it. Then he took an empty bass case, kissed her goodbye, loaded the case into his car's trunk and headed to the store.
At the store Bob tried out a bass he was interested in and discovered he really liked it. Bob had cash on him that he had taken from a hidden spot in his garage where he puts money from gigs and stuff he sells, so he paid for the bass, asked the store to set it up etc and told them he would pick it up the next day. Then he went home and just left the empty case in his trunk.
The next day Bob went back to the store to pick up his new bass, put it in the case, went home and told his wife he was going to go to his music room to test out the repaired bass. After a little test - just a few hours - the new bass just slipped into the collection with his other dozen or so basses.
Bob says he really didn't intend to deceive anyone... it just happened. Is this normal behavior, or is my friend a bad person?

It's okay Bob. I just buy it, and don't say anything. Then UPS shows up while I'm at work. I don't answer the phone call. Hahahaha. Im not that dumb return shipping is always too much to justify sending it back.

 

[BAG]

In his defense, Bob is 61 and was on the verge of retirement anyway. Money is not really an issue and the bass was a very inexpensive Squier Mini P. He just for some reason felt a bit guilty and didn't want to explain why he was buying another bass. He also didn't want to not buy the bass.

No probs then. At least you are self-aware enough to realise that you didn't really need another bass.

I don't need another bass either..... but i'd really like a decent active bass to complement my passive Franken P and Franken fretless Jazz. I'm sure i'll be able to get the wife's blessing before purchase.....

 

[JeezyMcNuggles]

What gave me away. Was it that Bob was also a bass player? I knew I should have said he played guitar...

No, the devil's in the details. If it weren't you, you'd just summarize. Haha, but its cool man. We all do things we're not proud of sometimes. It's part of life. We all have the right to do a little wrong sometimes. As long as you can live with the guilt/deal with the consequences.

 

[JeezyMcNuggles]

In his defense, Bob is 61 and was on the verge of retirement anyway. Money is not really an issue and the bass was a very inexpensive Squier Mini P. He just for some reason felt a bit guilty and didn't want to explain why he was buying another bass. He also didn't want to not buy the bass.

Mini P...100% justified

 

[bmusic]

I just read this thread to my wife and we had a good laugh. Yes, I have hidden basses from her (and guitars)(and synths). Yes, she has hidden purses and shoes and belts from me.

And yes, half of all marriages end in divorce. It's a rocky, unnatural road we all walk, and everybody manages it by their own rules.

For the record, I think total honesty would be ideal. My wife and I don't have an ideal marriage. But we're still together, and we still light each other's fires.

 

[pcake]

hiding basses or guitars would never work here. my husband, a hobby luthier and bigtime guitar and bass fan, is on a first name basis with every bass here - even though they don't have names

i usually get a bass, amp or something gear related for anniversaries, birthdays and christmas. come to think of it, i got a medium scale mezzo from arie for christmas and the ultra short smallguitars MB2 for my birthday. i got my husband a bass for his birthday and a discontinued guitar for... was it christmas? maybe...

Define "bad".......
Women expect men to have some secrets. Its part of what makes a man a man. A good woman recognises that.

guess i'm not a good woman, and my husband's not a good man. we don't sneak or have secrets, and we're perfectly happy without them

Bob needs a wife that he can be honest with.

from his posts, sounds like he has one. no idea why he had to sneak.

 

[Rolling Thunder]

Depends. Does he look exactly like you in a mirror?

I was thinking the same. The money part of the story has a lot of detail and also some leading rationale. I've snuck things from my wife but was also ready to justify it.

When you get caught, be ready own your actions. If the first words out of your mouth is a cover up lie, be ready to have a broader conversation. Just remember, women are like detectives (they ask question they already know the answer to).

As far as the whole "Am I....I mean...is he a bad person?" question, if you have to ask you're probably fishing for justification...I mean your friend is fishing....

 

[Killing Floor]

Ummm, I get it. Good for Bob. Let's face it, Bob probably knows his wife doesn't really understand how necessary it is to have more basses. She might even say the evil hex words "you can only play one, why do you need more than that?" Basses are like her shoes. Hey, Bob, how may really nice black leather bags in that closet? Maybe Bob could say I've been thinking about getting one of these... with some gig money sometime. Then the trap is set and he can act like he told her. Good luck. And pics or it didn't happen.

 

[pcake]

Ummm, I get it. Good for Bob. Let's face it, Bob probably knows his wife doesn't really understand how necessary it is to have more basses. She might even say the evil hex words "you can only play one, why do you need more than that?" Basses are like her shoes. Hey, Bob, how may really nice black leather bags in that closet? Maybe Bob could say I've been thinking about getting one of these... with some gig money sometime. Then the trap is set and he can act like he told her. Good luck. And pics or it didn't happen.

puh-leeze - not all women are alike. i own 2 pairs of athletic shoes, my work boots, a cheap pair of flats, and one bag - no brand, not leather. i do, however, own 8 basses (give or take, i have a lot of churn), a guitar and a keyboard - and an edrum kit.

 

[MichelD]

So my friend - I'll call him Bob - told his wife yesterday that he had to take one of his basses down to the shop to have some work done on it. Then he took an empty bass case, kissed her goodbye, loaded the case into his car's trunk and headed to the store.
At the store Bob tried out a bass he was interested in and discovered he really liked it. Bob had cash on him that he had taken from a hidden spot in his garage where he puts money from gigs and stuff he sells, so he paid for the bass, asked the store to set it up etc and told them he would pick it up the next day. Then he went home and just left the empty case in his trunk.
The next day Bob went back to the store to pick up his new bass, put it in the case, went home and told his wife he was going to go to his music room to test out the repaired bass. After a little test - just a few hours - the new bass just slipped into the collection with his other dozen or so basses.
Bob says he really didn't intend to deceive anyone... it just happened. Is this normal behavior, or is my friend a bad person?

Something like that happened to me with a shotgun.

I thought my wife thought that I had enough guns.

But I saw an ad on a hunting site for a 1960s Browning A5 semi-auto 12 gauge for a stupidly cheap price and agreed to meet the owner out at a farmer's field loaded with snow geese. We took turns shooting geese with the gun, I gave him the $150 he wanted and we phoned in the transfer to Canada's firearm registration site right from the goose field.

Then I snuck the new-to-me shotgun into the house with my other one.

Upstairs my wife says "What's this about a new shotgun?"

"Huh? what new shotgun?"


"The Canadian Firearms Centre called and said there was a problem with your firearms permit number in the new transfer you just made and you have to call them back."

BUSTED

 

[Killing Floor]

puh-leeze - not all women are alike. i own 2 pairs of athletic shoes, my work boots, a cheap pair of flats, and one bag - no brand, not leather. i do, however, own 8 basses (give or take, i have a lot of churn), a guitar and a keyboard - and an edrum kit.

Haha, yeah, sorry. Wait...8 basses, are you Bob?

 

[La Faro]

Is this the same Bob whose wife took an empty shoe box to the cobblers to get a heel repaired?

 

[BtaylorTheRogue]

told his wife yesterday that he had to take one of his basses down to the shop

took an empty bass case... loaded the case into his car's trunk and headed to the store

cash on him that he had taken from a hidden spot in his garage where he puts money

left the empty case in his trunk.

told his wife he was going...to test out the repaired bass

Bob says he really didn't intend to deceive anyone.

So many planned decisions.

 

[Funky Phantom]

Bob's a very smart man.

 

[logdrum]

It was not a blowup bass, so Bob is not bad.

 

[pcake]

Haha, yeah, sorry. Wait...8 basses, are you Bob?

*LOL*

 

[Huw Phillips]

100% truth and trust always otherwise what's the point

 

[Jon McBass]

So my friend - I'll call him Bob - told his wife yesterday that he had to take one of his basses down to the shop to have some work done on it. Then he took an empty bass case, kissed her goodbye, loaded the case into his car's trunk and headed to the store.
At the store Bob tried out a bass he was interested in and discovered he really liked it. Bob had cash on him that he had taken from a hidden spot in his garage where he puts money from gigs and stuff he sells, so he paid for the bass, asked the store to set it up etc and told them he would pick it up the next day. Then he went home and just left the empty case in his trunk.
The next day Bob went back to the store to pick up his new bass, put it in the case, went home and told his wife he was going to go to his music room to test out the repaired bass. After a little test - just a few hours - the new bass just slipped into the collection with his other dozen or so basses.
Bob says he really didn't intend to deceive anyone... it just happened. Is this normal behavior, or is my friend a bad person?

"Integrity is doing the right thing, even when no one is watching." —C. S. Lewis

 

[Joebone]

Don't ask, don't tell. Plain sight, no concealment. The less you fuss, the less the muss. Be tolerant of corresponding splurges - how's that shoe collection coming along...