Who to root for? Hope this list by my friend Brand Stanhope helps. Go Mariners!
Feel free to use the list to prioritize your teams during the postseason, which starts Tuesday.
1. Mariners. Have never won a title or even qualified for the World Series. Charming team.
2. Brewers. Have never won a World Series. Smaller-market team.
3. Guardians. Roared back from way, way behind. Haven't won a title since 1948. I still call them the Indians.
4. Reds. They're playing the Dodgers first.
5. Tigers. Cool old-school uniforms. Also, I played for the South Bay Tigers in Little League.
6. Padres. Should be lower, but it's hard to hate them. They're kind of the Giants' rival cousin. Battle them, but cheer for them if you can't do something.
7. Phillies. They're a fun team. Once I start watching them, they may move up the list.
8. Blue Jays. I often forget they're a team.
9-10. Cubs and Red Sox. Teams that somehow became synonomous with "tortured fan bases," even though their fans are no more tortured than Mariners or Brewers or (pre-2010) Giants fans. They just have a lot of writers who like them and constantly beat us over the head with them.
11-50. Vacant
51. Yankees. Still the Evil Empire.
52-1,000,000. Vacant.
1,000,001. Dodgers. I guess there's a way you could root for them . . . no, there's not.