"Party" gig is actually a wedding

[INTP]

A written contract with details about services, dress, set times, etc. would be a good idea.

 

[sean_on_bass]

This is a new tactic that is actually encouraged by "wedding planning tips" type articles. Conveniently leave out the fact that it is a wedding to get a much lower rate. I planned my own wedding last year and saw this more than once. I get it though, some people will inflate their price beyond reasonable for a wedding gig.

Me, i would still do the gig of course. It's a paid gig, nothing wrong with that. Like others have suggested do the gig like a party and leave out the special wedding stuff to be commensorate with the pay.

 

[RustyAxe]

I have this gig coming up on Saturday. The client has been saying all along that it was just a party, but we found out last night that it's actually a wedding. Our percussionist, who also has a photography business, heard this and said "Yeah, they told us that because we would charge more for a wedding, people do that to me all the time".

Now let me be clear, I'm not mad. I'm going to get paid, so I don't care if someone is saying "I do" or not. But I'm curious, has anyone else had this happen?

Wow. No, I've not had this happen. If it did, I'd be sure to wear my party clothes (not a suit and tie), I'd be sure not to sing or emcee any wedding events (no, I won't sing "the bride cuts the cake"), I wouldn't introduce the wedding party, ..... ie, I'd treat it like a bar gig. You may not always get what you paid for, but it's a cinch you WON'T get MORE than you paid for. I'd be damned pissed ... to the point (almost) of cancelling the gig.

 

[RustyAxe]

I've played quite a few weddings where it was no more elaborate than a basic gig: Show up, set up, play, go home. These are often weddings involving older people, often their second wedding, and they're trying to keep things simple and low key. Sometimes people don't dance at all, and there isn't always a dance floor. The clients who book these weddings probably don't pay a huge amount for the band, though I have no idea, as I always get a flat rate as a sideman.

I'm pretty much the same ... I usually don't care what the private party is all about, as long as I get paid ... but ...

If the client has expectations beyond a basic gig, such as showing up hours in advance, loud dance music, emcee duties, and so forth, then those can be offered at an added cost. You can always say: "We didn't know it was a wedding, and were prepared for a basic party. But we can talk about the cost for additional services."

... this is what happens at weddings. I suppose your approach is less knee-jerk than my own, and despite my bravado in a previous post, I'd do the same. But they sure wouldn't get it for free ... those are the reasons we get more for wedding gigs.

 

[RustyAxe]

You just contradicted yourself. That's the gig. If you just want to do what you want to do regardless of what is expected, then you aren't being professional.

A wedding is a very special day in family's lives. It's not about you. If that's how you feel, stay home and don't ruin their party.

A guy hires me to dig a post hole. I quote a price. When I arrive he wants me to dig a swimming pool. That ain't the gig I was hired for. If they cared so much about their "very special day" they should be willing to pay for it.

 

[sowilson]

Contact the person that booked you and run through what the clients expectations are of your band and what your band provides at the price quoted. If it's typical wedding band stuff then quote them a rate to make up the difference, if not then you're good.

 

[Hopkins]

In all fairness, I understand why they said it's just a party. They were expecting the bands in the area to be extortionists. That's kind of a jerk thing to do (charge more for a wedding than a party). They just didn't want to be screwed.

I say play the part & politely explain to them that you don't charge more for a wedding than a party. Earn their trust and you'll gain someone who will spread the good word about your band.

I would charge more for a wedding, simply because playing a wedding usually involves wearing a suit and tie, where a party is more of a casual gig.

 

[zenman]

Some of you guys really let your imagination carry you away! These days weddings take on all shapes and forms ranging from a simple get-together to the full-blown fairy-tail event. Not the bands problem. They got hird to play a party and that's exactly what they should do. Anything above & beyond normal gig responsibilities will cost extra.

 

[awilkie84]

I would charge more for a wedding, simply because playing a wedding usually involves wearing a suit and tie, where a party is more of a casual gig.

You'd charge more because you have to dress up? That's pretty harsh, dude. That's like expecting to be paid more by your employer because they want you to look presentable when a VP is in town.

 

[Febs]

For those of you saying treat it like a bar gig, do you actually play private party events? There is a huge difference between playing a private party and playing a bar.

 

[MultiScaleMale]

Some of you guys really let your imagination carry you away! These days weddings take on all shapes and forms ranging from a simple get-together to the full-blown fairy-tail event. Not the bands problem. They got hird to play a party and that's exactly what they should do. Anything above & beyond normal gig responsibilities will cost extra.

Yeah, but this needs to be dealt with prior to the wedding day. Proper expectation from the wedding party on what they're getting is critical to keep this from turning into a fiasco, or at least the potential for a fiasco.

Anyways, looking forward to the gig report from the OP after the gig happens.

 

[Ralph Notoro]

A guy hires me to dig a post hole. I quote a price. When I arrive he wants me to dig a swimming pool. That ain't the gig I was hired for. If they cared so much about their "very special day" they should be willing to pay for it.

You (and others ) are completely missing the point. It isn't about telling the client what they did wrong. It's about providing a service. Is the band even capable of running a wedding gig? if not, they're lucky they got called. If the people just want them to play what they do, what's the difference? You're all acting like you've been insulted to be asked to go to work.

Maybe it's a millenial thing. They fart and expect applause.

News flash. You don't get a trophy just for showing up. This is business, not an argument with your social studies teacher.

 

[buldog5151bass]

For those of you saying treat it like a bar gig, do you actually play private party events? There is a huge difference between playing a private party and playing a bar.

.

And there is a huge difference between a private party and a wedding.

 

[hrodbert696]

Looking at it from the opposite side, the client might feel that having different prices for "wedding" or "party" is also under-handed. Having to reveal just the right information to get offered the right service / price is a turn-off. Some people love to haggle, most hate it.

I'd agree that it would be under-handed to charge quadruple the money and then do exactly the same thing as you would do for your lower charge. I'm assuming that wedding-mode is a big step up for the band from backyard-party-mode. Beyond that, it's supply and demand. If your band is good enough and well-reputed enough to be in demand, your fair market price is higher.

 

[Ender_rpm]

You (and others ) are completely missing the point. It isn't about telling the client what they did wrong. It's about providing a service. Is the band even capable of running a wedding gig? if not, they're lucky they got called. If the people just want them to play what they do, what's the difference? You're all acting like you've been insulted to be asked to go to work.

Maybe it's a millenial thing. They fart and expect applause.

News flash. You don't get a trophy just for showing up. This is business, not an argument with your social studies teacher.

Have fun yelling at those clouds dude.

 

[Dogbertday]

I actually played a wedding reception once where the couple literally asked the bar to book us that night and just brought their party. Aside from two requests we learned (very easy songs) it was just a bar gig. And the bar was happy cause they had a large party of drinkers all night.

But it was the cheapest way to possibly do it for the newly weds. I mean they found a way for the bar to pay their wedding band.

 

[Febs]

.

And there is a huge difference between a private party and a wedding.

Of course. I never said otherwise.

 

[Gougedeye]

We charge the same for all events. Start high and negociate from there. Go out and have a good time!

 

[Altitude]

If the only difference between a "wedding" and a "party" is the price, then the client just pulled an arbitrage, but did nothing dishonest.

I've played quite a few weddings where it was no more elaborate than a basic gig: Show up, set up, play, go home. These are often weddings involving older people, often their second wedding, and they're trying to keep things simple and low key. Sometimes people don't dance at all, and there isn't always a dance floor. The clients who book these weddings probably don't pay a huge amount for the band, though I have no idea, as I always get a flat rate as a sideman.

If the client has expectations beyond a basic gig, such as showing up hours in advance, loud dance music, emcee duties, and so forth, then those can be offered at an added cost. You can always say: "We didn't know it was a wedding, and were prepared for a basic party. But we can talk about the cost for additional services."

Perfect answer. If you would do nothing different for a wedding than for a party, the client has, IMO, successfully called you out. If your offering is different for each, you should probably discuss the differences with the client right now. Let's say some of them are important to the client, like taking special requests for dance songs or maybe bringing a trumpet player, or something. But very specifically attire, which your guys may have to rent.

You have a completely legitimate opportunity to advise your client that those services move you into a wedding offering, which carries a higher price because it increases your cost. He may acknowledge and just tell you to do the party thing. Or pay you more to do the wedding thing.

But you need to have the conversation now, not show up in hawaiian shirts out of spite or something else stupid like that, which will create conflict during the gig and ruin the most important day in the bride's life.

 

[Altitude]

We'll play your wedding, but we have rules.

1. No requests. NONE.
2. Father of the bride dance, etc, will be done by a DJ, not us. If you want that stuff from us, we will play songs AS a DJ, and there will be an additional fee.
3. We're not a wedding band. If you are looking to make your reception fun by having a live band, that plays classic rock, then we're your band.

You bet, run right in there and lay down the law with your employer about "how it's going to be." This, right here, is why musicians never make money.