Should I stay or should I go?

[Nightman]

Churches have to appeal to the generation with deeper pockets. After all, a church is a business needing financial support from the congregation, and playing for one should be viewed as working for that business in a musician capacity.
Go to your upper room and decide what’s best for you.

 

[BlackVincent52]

The first guy to reply was correct— you really just need to pray harder.

 

[Matty Koff]

I mean, they have to be there, since their paycheck is tied to the success of the church, right?

It's not unheard of for a church to pay their musicians. If you feel like it's become a job.. ask for some dough every week imo. I know a musician who gets paid for her church gig at least.

 

[mrperkolator]

I really get your issue. Ok what I'm about to say is within the context of the genre of worship, a style of music. I'm not trying to get into religion, but it's part of the music.

In the past couple of years I've noticed a change in the messaging (im not sure how long it's gone on, I just noticed it lately) in much of the worship music. It has changed from what I would call "God focused" to "me" focused. Messaging changed to some sort of a variation of "im awesome because God loves me." IMHO, this isn't worship. Makes it harder to play. ESPECIALLY when the band leader insists on basically being a cover band. Example: He rushed a song, so I played quarter notes so he, and everyone else, would hear the beat better. He got mad. That wasn't the way Hillsong did it. (sorry end rant).

This change of messaging and lack of willingness to have our own sound is what drove me to "take a break indefinitely." Perhaps you need a break too. It's really hard to play music you aren't excited about, no matter what the genre is.

Mods - if I accidentally went over the "no religion" line, PM me. I'll edit and delete no big deal. I tried to keep it in context of the genre, and not preachy.

 

[Gothic]

Disclaimer: I don't get the "music in Church" thing you guys got over there. Don't even know what you play. So I'm looking at this from a "just another gig" point of view.
And I think the core values would apply here. Hang, music, money. I'll add mental health. If enough of those get a tick, keep doing it. If not, leave.

 

[IronSpatula]

and finally, I want to point out the advantages of being a church musician. The environment is substance and alcohol free, you are surrounded by nicer than average humans, Your contributions are supported, encouraged, and appreciated, and there is very little backstabbing and ego plays. I doubt you will get the same offer in the secular world.

I just want to say that you’ve been very blessed. Aside from the lack of substances, that doesn’t square with my experience. I’ve actually seen more backstabbing and ego plays in church than in my secular musical environments, with an ironically lower bar for excellence to boot, and I know others who’ve seen the same.

Don’t get me wrong, there are some wonderful, healthy places to serve and I’m currently plugged in at one. But church involvement can be a minefield and with the expectation of goodwill and submission to authority among volunteers, the potential for abuse is huge. Be thankful for what you have!

 

[Leigh Semmens]

It's not unheard of for a church to pay their musicians. If you feel like it's become a job.. ask for some dough every week imo. I know a musician who gets paid for her church gig at least.

I've been playing in Churches in OZ for over forty years, Paid musos? Not saying it doesn't happen, but not normal down under.

To the point of the OP: Why are you playing? Is it "just another gig", or you enjoy it (doesn't sound like it), or are you there to bring people into the presence of God. Only one of those answers is the right one BTW. The other two would indicate to me that you really need to find another band. If it ain't fun, don't do it any more!!!!

I have noticed that a lot of current music is more geared towards the Item rather than congregational singing, so, in effect, that does put P&W more into the realm of entertainment than what happened in the past. Good or bad, that is a discussion for another forum.

 

[dirtychinchilla]

I just want to say that you’ve been very blessed. Aside from the lack of substances, that doesn’t square with my experience. I’ve actually seen more backstabbing and ego plays in church than in my secular musical environments, with an ironically lower bar for excellence to boot, and I know others who’ve seen the same.

Don’t get me wrong, there are some wonderful, healthy places to serve and I’m currently plugged in at one. But church involvement can be a minefield and with the expectation of goodwill and submission to authority among volunteers, the potential for abuse is huge. Be thankful for what you have!

I was going to say, are they really nicer than average?

 

[MotorCityMinion]

I still enjoy playing. But the new, enhanced focus on the stage production is a little off-putting.

Whether it's one man preaching at the podium or a full band and choir, evangelical churches have always been a stage production. Show business indeed. I've never agreed with any music in church beyond a simple choir.

IMO, politics and religion should never entwine but birds of a feather...

 

[Medicine Man]

Its not any different than playing on amy other act that has become so commercial that it lost its original appeal. I would (and have) quit any group that switched to a click track driven multimedia production over a collaboration of musicians focusing on music. Ive worked on large stage productions because the money was good, but that type of show, despite the high calibre of musicians in them, stifles music imho.

 

[lbbc]

I started playing bass in church 47 years ago...the Pastor bought a bass and bass combo amp so I would play in their Contemporary Christian band. It was initially rewarding, from a musical and religious point of view. I left that situation when my beliefs didn't exactly gel with the direction the church was heading. I spoke with the Pastor, and the band members, about my concerns and gave the gear back. Being honest with yourself and others will serve you best in the long run.

 

[RichardW]

Seems to me "the show" has always been part of church music from the very beginning. There's a reason European cathedrals were bathed in stained glass lighting and often have massive organs and choirs. There's a reason gospel church bands would work parishioners into a fervent lather of clapping, dancing, and singing. There's a long history of group worship as a total sensory experience. Nothing wrong with that.

Remember, no matter what you decide, God loves you.

 

[lark_z]

I've never gigged in my life, but I too grew up never missing a Sunday. I grew away from that. Finally got over the guilt and all years ago. Happy. Having lunch today with my twin brother and I'm sure I'll get leaned on under the guise of "we really worry about you". Sigh.

Follow your heart.

 

[jdh3000]

I think you're confusing what you should or shouldn't do as to have to do with going against that which you hold as sacred.
A church like, any institution is subject to human error, and to what extent you follow that for the sake of your beliefs is what's in question.

In other words if you have doubts about staying or going, I wouldn't base it on any spiritual obligation, but on the situation at hand.

I've been in similar situations in groups and jobs where people changed, philosophies changed; I had to step back an evaluate it on its own and say this is not for me.

Imagine what you would so if it wasn't a church, take that element out of the equation, then you'll have your answer.

 

[Eric Swaim]

I have been playing the same Church for 14 and a half years without ever missing a Sunday. Its a smaller church about 200 on Sunday and 400 when we have a picnic or food involved. I played at a Big televised Church for 6 months back in 2000. It was a zoo. When a Church makes it more of a Production every Sunday and less on "the Word & Truth" then you have a spiritual issue at that place.

Last thing to remember. We are not to conform to any Church, but as Believer of the Living GOD, follow his word, not man's.

 

[yodedude2]

the context may change, but the reasons to show up & play remain: music, money, and hang, must have a clear majority of the three.

 

[Scarysharkface]

Disclaimer: I know we're not allowed to talk religion on these boards, but the venue in question is a church. And it's a regular gig. I'll do my best not to cross that line.

I grew up in church. It's part of the fabric of who I am, whether I like it or not. I've almost always volunteered to 'serve' in music wherever I've attended. Most recently, I've been playing bass (& sometimes lead guitar) at a the 'big church' (roughly 1500-2000 ppl) in our small(ish) town. Been doing that a few times a month for the past 5 years.

I'm surrounded by a good group of musicians. No attitudes. Good vibe. Okay... maybe the keyboard player noodles instead of knowing his part, but that's to be expected with gospel keyboard players, right?

Over the years, I have found my beliefs to drift away from those of the church. While Evangelical churches have become more and more corporate and political, I have become less so. But I've kept playing, telling myself that I do it because of the relationships I have with my fellow bandmates and a few other folks at the church. And I've liked the idea of helping out, since this church does a lot for the community.

Recently, the church band has been transitioning to click tracks, Ableton...etc, along with an upscale video/audio suite. I've started noticing some new musicians that I don't know or have that relationship with. I've also started noticing that a lot of the older players are playing less and less. Without those guys, I become one of the older guys on stage by a decade or more. Granted I'm young at heart (immature? lol) and stuff like that doesn't bother me. Still, it's different than it used to be.

I still enjoy playing. But the new, enhanced focus on the stage production is a little off-putting. It feels like the focus is on the wrong thing. The influx of what I see as restrictive changes, combined with my growing and changing belief system is making me wonder if it's worth showing up anymore. Maybe it's better to walk away, for my own well-being. Or maybe it's good for me to continue to help out?

I've discussed this with the lead pastor. I've also talked with the worship pastor (I think he gets it). But I'm not sure I'm getting unbiased advice from either of them. I mean, they have to be there, since their paycheck is tied to the success of the church, right?

Without getting into a religious discussion, I'm curious if anyone else here has had a similar experience? Maybe it wasn't a church, but something similar? What did you do? If not, what would you do?

In my experience, this exemplifies that we are often nothing more than a commodity in their business model. It's a business, God or no God, and typically the business goal is to get more young people through the door and that means getting the old people off the stage. Do what feels right for you and move on if that feels better, because like any other venue you are expendable in their eyes. To quote the song, "If I go there will be trouble. If I stay it will be double." Good luck.

John

 

[EarnestTBass]

Without getting into a religious discussion, I'm curious if anyone else here has had a similar experience? Maybe it wasn't a church, but something similar? What did you do? If not, what would you do?

I have a similar background. I too grew up in a church and have served, all my life, by playing music and singing in the choir.

My church's response, and organized religion's response in general, to the pandemic, public health issues and political events made me re evaluate whether I could/should continue attending church. Months ago, I resigned from the worship team I had served in for twenty years. I do not know if God will find me fit to serve anywhere else again.

However, I do remain clear about what I am not going to do.

 

[MynameisMe]

I have played in many churches in the last 30 years. If you enjoy the music ministry there are plenty of opportunities elsewhere. I can see where I would also not care for that environment.
I am silver crowned and mid 50's. I see ageism as a real thing in all environments.
The mega churches love the kids on stage.
Go find a new place to serve.
Perhaps a smaller church.
You may be surprised at the talent level of musicians and singers at some of the smaller churches.
The other option is to find an new church and don't play music, find a different ministry to serve in.
However, poor advice is to just leave and say I am not interested in serving anymore, anywhere.
Examine your heart and why you participate where you do.
The P&W forum moves faster than most the forums on TB. You may have brought it up there already but on that forum you will get like minded serving folks who will have more of an idea where you're coming from.
Cheers,
Bruce

 

[kwdhsk]

I re-entered the world of bass playing at the age of about 55 at my then-church (I played as a teen and then took about 35 years off for life and raising a family). It was my gateway back into music and ultimately led to playing out with local bands as well. I still love playing at church more than any paying gig (no $ for playing at church). I hope you can reconcile your conflicts. My current church has been very successful (growing like a weed) and I see some of the same changes you see. The good outweighs the bad for me so I don't have a problem just going along with the (minor) changes. The music is still awesome. Again, I hope you can reconcile your concerns or find another place to serve.