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Venting - LS can't handle playing in a bar that serves shots.

#302
Our guitar player likes to have a few too many occasionally. However, he still plays great, never really misses a beat and only rarely has to be pointed to the setlist to know which song we are playing next and which guitar hes going to switch to. Even with that, we still ride him over it. We make sure he knows we are serious, but we have fun with it because we are friends. So now, he has much less and makes jokes about it himself. If it wasn't a friend situation, we would have replaced him after the first warning if it had continued.
 
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#305
Feral Feline said:
I feel the flood of relief, congrats and best wishes with your next band/project/endeavour.
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Yes, there's a definite sense of relief! I knew that I was going to have a conflict with him, so am dealing with this before that happens. As I mentioned earlier in this thread, I play in another band with the drummer, so want to maintain a positive tone while making my departure. Will probably discuss my reasons with the drummer once this is all done, but want to get through the March 13 gig before I do so. Both bands I'm in will be playing that gig. I really do want to improve my jamming / improv skills as well, to make me a more marketable bass player, so this frees up time and energy to do that.
 
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#306
Steve Dallman said:
I was a supervisor in a manufacturing plant for 30 years. When we had a problem, my first action was to stop the problem, next, make sure it didn't happen again, and then, if necessary, take disciplinary action. I rarely got to the disciplinary part. My goal was a smooth running plant without these problems. I would adress the problem objectively and done right, end up with a better employee, and not a bitter one, embarrassed and resentful.

I see this similarly. The problem is his alcohol use ruined a paying gig. The immediate problem is over...he sobered up. Now, how to make sure it doesn't happen again. Can you openly speak to him about the ruined gig without sounding like you're attacking him. If he feels attacked, he will be defensive and blame everything but his alcohol use. He will heap excuse on excuse.

I don't know him, so I can't come up with exactly how to deal with him. He has to know, the band has a problem and he, as part of the band, has to help come up with a solution.

FWIW, I used to drink at least a case of beer at gigs. I was that guy. I did it for 12 years. I quit drinking in 83. Besides getting a DUI, I found out that our drummer would get so pissed off at me for being too drunk at a gig, and instead of confronting me, he'd go home and beat his girlfriend. I quit drinking and she was never hit again.

I enjoyed playing and did a far better job after I quit drinking. There was no downside to quitting.
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Have to ask, was that during the era of 24 bottle/can cases?

Dear Lord, i'm impressed you stopped!

Mega respect!
 
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#310
lat said:
Yes, there's a definite sense of relief! I knew that I was going to have a conflict with him, so am dealing with this before that happens. As I mentioned earlier in this thread, I play in another band with the drummer, so want to maintain a positive tone while making my departure. Will probably discuss my reasons with the drummer once this is all done, but want to get through the March 13 gig before I do so. Both bands I'm in will be playing that gig. I really do want to improve my jamming / improv skills as well, to make me a more marketable bass player, so this frees up time and energy to do that.
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Best of luck with future projects. You're a class act.
 
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#313
The March 13 gig was cancelled due to our good friend Covid, so I'm fully out now. Love the weight being lifted off my shoulders. It's given me energy to start working on a list of songs I've wanted to learn for myself, but haven't had the desire. All of a sudden, it's back! yay!
 
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#314
lat said:
Love the weight being lifted off my shoulders. It's given me energy to start working on a list of songs I've wanted to learn for myself, but haven't had the desire. All of a sudden, it's back! yay!
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Glad to hear it!
Few things are quite as freeing as having an unwanted responsibility finally off your shoulders.
Rock on in good emotional health!
 

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