WHY PLAYING BASS IS BETTER THAN YOUR SPOUSE

[QORC]

looking for some creative ideas here...hehe

1. you can play with your bass for 15 minutes, put it down, pick it up 30 minutes later and finger it again, and it will never complain or turn you down.

2. Your bass never asks if its "too fat"

3. Your bass never asks if you preferred your "ex-bass" that you had in college.

4. Your bass doesn't care if you watch football while you play with it.

5. Your bass won't sag after 20 years.

6. Your bass never says "you used to be sooooooo romantic!!"

 

[Roland777]

7. You can finger the G-string whenever you bloody feel like it.
8. ... and slap it whenever you feel like it as well.

 

[Rattman]

9. Your bass never bores you to death by asking ENDLESS questions.
10. Your bass doesn't mind if you don't like to "shop"
11. Basses don't complain about your snoring
12. Basses never snarl at you: "what? You're on TalkBass AGAIN?"

 

[rushfan73]

Your bass does not mind if you play with other basses!

 

[need4mospd]

Your bass does not mind if you play with other basses!

Beat me to it! I've been eying that "Fodera" next door.

 

[tbone0813]

Don't forget that your bass won't ask for half of the assets when you get divorced for paying too much attention to your bass, or talking on TB for too long, but your wife will which means you might be selling your bass to pay for the divorce anyway.

 

[Otso]

Unfortunately, playing a lot with your bass will not result in receiving a small bass.

 

[beyondhairy]

your bass doesn't mind if you have more then 1

its ok if you finger a minor

 

[Fassa Albrecht]

Your bass won't hog half the covers if you take it to bed with you!
Saying this, I'm female, why AM I on this forum??

 

[Roundwound]

If your bass becomes noisy over time, you just have to replace the electronics and not spend six months in counseling.

 

[rushfan73]

It will always stay the same size as the day you got it.

Is always in the mood.

You don't have to ask befor you try new things out on it.

 

[christobass 416]

You won't get yelled at if you leave it alone for weeks at a time.

 

[beyondhairy]

all you need is 2 fingers and a thumb,

or does that apply to both? lol



hmmm why a bass is better then a spouse? i can carry it in a bag on my back and not get stoped by the cops.. i win..

 

[buliwyfff]

your bass wont call the cops when it "falls down the stairs"

 

[birdxofxprey]

you can turn down the volume on your bass

you can grip your bass tightly around the neck.

you can get your bass' neck straightened as it gets older.

you can lock your bass in a case.

most amps have a mute button.

most basses have a trade-in value.

strap locks, baby!

 

[ryla]

it will always ask for mwah!

 

[SundanceChile]

A bass' feelings stay consistent throughout the entire year.

 

[LutherHeggs00]

Regardless of what your mother told you, playing with your bass every chance you get will not make you go blind.

 

[LutherHeggs00]

After a marathon 'play' session, you don't mind snuggling with your bass.

 

[meev991]

You can slap it and call it your bitch, and even after all of that, she still won't leave u