Enjoy the benefits of a premium membership!
Upgrade Account
-
TalkBass has been independent since 1998. Add your voice.
Create a free account to reply to discussions, view embedded media, and browse with fewer display ads.
Join free Log in
Want zero display ads or expanded classifieds tools? Compare plans.
You know you're playing a high-class place when.....
- Thread starter coop
- Start date
You know you're in a "high class" place when the clientele's # of teeth per capita is less than 1.0. 
Randy
Randy
James Hart said:
I've been to a place that does something like that. 50 gallon drums cut in half, filled with ice and plumbed into the floor. As well as stalls with no doors, which is my favorite. There's nothing better than walking in to piss and seeing my guitard dominating a toilet while the drunks try to have a conversation with him about his gear. Good times.
One of the places we regularly play has cubicle doors that are only 3 foot high. I envision going to take a leak one day there and turning round to be greeted by a guy taking care 'o business in one of the stalls.
Guy in stall: "Hi There!"
Me: "Uh...hey"
Guy in stall: "Hi There!"
Me: "Uh...hey"
At least it has doors! Thinking of most of the toilets in nightclubs in my home town in the UK, they don't have doors! Mind you, I suspect thats mostly to stop people taking drugs in the stalls but still. Unpleasant!
I was hoping to post another pic of a sign in another toilet that we play, but the booking has been put off for another month. So you'll just have to imagine this one.
"Do not put your cigarette butts in the urinal....
the same hands that fish them out are the ones serving your drinks ! "
"Do not put your cigarette butts in the urinal....
the same hands that fish them out are the ones serving your drinks ! "
I chauffeured/roadied for a friend to a place in the wilds of Northern California about 15 years ago. The town was having a yearly festival and he was the solo act at one of the better restaurants there. When we got there, we found that the restaurant's sewage system had backed up and it looked like the eatery may not open for the festival. Bright ideas kicked in.
They started using every huge cooking pot they had to empty enough of the septic tank so they could open. But where to put the sewage? They decided to dump the pots into the river directly behind the establishment. Somewhere downstream I could see kids jumping from a bridge and swimming in the river. Needless to say, I did not eat anything even though I was offered a free meal. It was like living that episode of Seinfeld seeing Poppie kneading the pizza dough. I had some bottles of beer and left it at that.
They started using every huge cooking pot they had to empty enough of the septic tank so they could open. But where to put the sewage? They decided to dump the pots into the river directly behind the establishment. Somewhere downstream I could see kids jumping from a bridge and swimming in the river. Needless to say, I did not eat anything even though I was offered a free meal. It was like living that episode of Seinfeld seeing Poppie kneading the pizza dough. I had some bottles of beer and left it at that.
Well yeah, if there is one person that might need to use the stall in a pub, it's one of the guys playing in the band. I dunno the idea of having to make eye contact with the next guy that walks in while you're dealing with pre-gig stomach issues is almost sitcom worthy material.
Worst of all is no toilet paper, or the dreaded loose toilet seat! Gah!
I also once walked in to find a cornish pasty in the bowl!? That's not a euphemism. I mean literally a Ginsters Pasty! I just admitted defeat right there and then.
We play a place that has a sign over the urinal from the manager that says " Quit pissin on my floor"! If you have a short bat step closer to the plate.Although the crapper is a mess She puts a section of newspaper on the floor since many must have ..short bats or just can't read.
