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abrubtly quitting?
- Thread starter jnuts1
- Start date
Get your gear back and head for the hills! Run! Quickly! This just has disaster written all over it. Not worth the $50 you "might" make.
Say goodbye right away. Like the saying goes, "Don't burn your bridges". Be nice about it, say that the band just isn't what you are looking for and that it's time to move on. Don't argue or get angry if the others start crap with you. While you may never play with these people again, avoid blowing up and making an ass out of yourself because it will just be entertaining to them and they will spread the work quickly that you are the problem, not them. This could ruin other musical opportunities because there would be a bad word on the street about you. Chalk all this up to experience and be a better person from it.
No - show up, get your gear - and play if it's okay... but if it's not - BAIL.
And bring a buddy. I mean it - a buddy with some muscle. And a tazer!
And bring a buddy. I mean it - a buddy with some muscle. And a tazer!
Sounds like you need to get your gear, now. I wouldn't trust them an inch. And never ride in a vehicle with your gear in another... Never. That is asking for a headache at the least.
After you get your gear: Don't even worry about being polite about leaving, just tell them that you're not interested in doing this with them anymore. If they beg and plead, tell them that you will have to charge them your professional rate of $300/gig cash, paid in full, at least 2 weeks in advance. With how childish you say they are acting, no matter what, they will bad mouth you for a few weeks till they find a new sucker.. err bassist...
After you get your gear: Don't even worry about being polite about leaving, just tell them that you're not interested in doing this with them anymore. If they beg and plead, tell them that you will have to charge them your professional rate of $300/gig cash, paid in full, at least 2 weeks in advance. With how childish you say they are acting, no matter what, they will bad mouth you for a few weeks till they find a new sucker.. err bassist...
Get your stuff and go. I am not against taking drugs, do or don't its up to you. To spike someone's drink or even the question of did they or didn't they is not acceptable. Go now before you are (just for kicks) they're next experiment. Go away and play another day.
How are you playing a gig with these clowns on Friday but your "other band" on Thursday, when your "other band" has a gig scheduled for Friday?
I use a sub when this comes up. the other band does a lot of classic rock so it is no big deal.
but this is a little different cause this kid really pulls some stuff when booking. i already had thursday & saturday booked & he booked that friday & sunday (way out of town) because i was free at the time. when i first told them i would play for them, i had all of august free & he booked EVERY WEEKEND for that month since it was 5 months away & my other band didn't have any bookings in that month yet (we just finished setting up july). i had to tell him it was not cool to book me like that & i always need to be told in advance of any dates he was going to book. he was trying to get me so busy i couldn't play with anyone else.
edit: i forgot to mention the way i got double booked, we played a bar & as soon as we were done they requested the this friday & my guys took it.
but this is a little different cause this kid really pulls some stuff when booking. i already had thursday & saturday booked & he booked that friday & sunday (way out of town) because i was free at the time. when i first told them i would play for them, i had all of august free & he booked EVERY WEEKEND for that month since it was 5 months away & my other band didn't have any bookings in that month yet (we just finished setting up july). i had to tell him it was not cool to book me like that & i always need to be told in advance of any dates he was going to book. he was trying to get me so busy i couldn't play with anyone else.
edit: i forgot to mention the way i got double booked, we played a bar & as soon as we were done they requested the this friday & my guys took it.
Play the gig. Protect your drink. Pack up your gear and bring it home. Don't let on that anything is up. Next day contact them and say you're done.
If you tell them the night of the gig that you are quitting, they may act unpredictably.
Best to wait til the next day when you and you're gear is safe.
If you tell them the night of the gig that you are quitting, they may act unpredictably.
Best to wait til the next day when you and you're gear is safe.
they got your gear you CAN'T abruptly quit. You gotta at the very least show up for the gig, and you better hope they show up too.
Are you still trying to decide what to do?
Are you still trying to decide what to do?
I would probably show up fri to get the gear and play IF they show up. I would not quit or confront them on the gig at all. If you want a drink get a shot and down it before anyone can dose you and bottled water as someone said.
If they do not show up or show up without ALL your gear. I would get the guys address if I had to strangle sombody to get it. And I would probably first get a large friend go by with me and get it. If there was a scene trying to get the gear I would call the local sherriff and they will meet you and help you retrieve your gear. I actually did this once.
I NEVER let anyone take my gear. I have in the far distant past and it ended up in the "wrong" place, never again. I ALWAYS drive myself, too many variables when others control your destiny.
It sounds like you are learning some hard lessons
Best of luck.
Peace Capt Kirk
If they do not show up or show up without ALL your gear. I would get the guys address if I had to strangle sombody to get it. And I would probably first get a large friend go by with me and get it. If there was a scene trying to get the gear I would call the local sherriff and they will meet you and help you retrieve your gear. I actually did this once.
I NEVER let anyone take my gear. I have in the far distant past and it ended up in the "wrong" place, never again. I ALWAYS drive myself, too many variables when others control your destiny.
It sounds like you are learning some hard lessons
Best of luck.
Peace Capt Kirk
They suck, show complete contempt for the gig and SPIKE drinks. Are you F**KING kidding RUN! How will a DUI help you? How 'bout a possion bust? This is NOT a musicial situation where you gut up and do the show; this is your health, saftey and sanity at stake leave and leave fast. You have other gigs one more shot with these idiots can only hurt you. If it was you kid, wife, or best friend would you want them to show? Please drop the 'show must go on' crap and do yourself a favor -RUN.
Great! Then you already are the better person for it and you'll do fine with other musicians.
BTW, this kind of thing happens a lot. It's part of the scenery. It will frustrate you, but it'll make for some good stories to tell.
Maybe you should spike their drinks, you collect the money at the end of the night, load your amp into your car, and then, "just decide to go home".
Just a thought.
Just a thought.
Given that they obviously do not have any respect for themselves, or the venues, let alone, you, just leave, NOW. They have already shown that they don't care, so why should you? It's their problem (you leaving), and by staying you're letting them make their problems your problems. Their ability to trash your reputation is nil.
Ordinarily, I wouldn't advise a no-notice departure, but this situation is intolerable. If it were me, I would just leave, with a phone call and no notice. Don't worry about leaving them with no bass player, they brought it on themselves, and they need to feel the pain of that. You don't do them any favors by insulating them from that pain.
Some years back, I fronted a 3 piece band, and one night the guitarist and drummer got so drunk they really couldn't play. I got so pissed off that I took off my bass, shut off my rig, and left the stage in the middle of a song. I walked out of the club and sat on the curb, trying to regain my composure. I was gone for about a half hour, and when I came back in, the other two guys were drinking coffee, trying to sober up, and were very apologetic. We managed to finish the night, but they got a royal ass-chewing from me. It never happened again. Fortunately, the owner saw what was happening, and told me he didn't blame me for doing what I did, and actually respected me for doing it.
Ordinarily, I wouldn't advise a no-notice departure, but this situation is intolerable. If it were me, I would just leave, with a phone call and no notice. Don't worry about leaving them with no bass player, they brought it on themselves, and they need to feel the pain of that. You don't do them any favors by insulating them from that pain.
Some years back, I fronted a 3 piece band, and one night the guitarist and drummer got so drunk they really couldn't play. I got so pissed off that I took off my bass, shut off my rig, and left the stage in the middle of a song. I walked out of the club and sat on the curb, trying to regain my composure. I was gone for about a half hour, and when I came back in, the other two guys were drinking coffee, trying to sober up, and were very apologetic. We managed to finish the night, but they got a royal ass-chewing from me. It never happened again. Fortunately, the owner saw what was happening, and told me he didn't blame me for doing what I did, and actually respected me for doing it.
This is an interesting and somewhat contradictory post.
You simultaneously encourage OP to forget ethics and standards and bolt on his band, and then go on to relate an incident where you had an intervention and reconciliation with yours.
I liked your approach about venting and getting through the evening with your band. That showed class.
Whatever OP does, I hope it has similar class and doesn't lower him to the poor standards of his bandmates. If he bolts on his unprofessional bandmates, they could very well get angry and spread bad rumors about him. It could hamper his future efforts.
It happens.
There is a way to quit that preserves your integrity, and there is a way to quit that gives you a bad reputation. Choose your words and actions carefully.
