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An Essay, August 2, 2009

#41
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how to be miserable as a professional musician: a ten-step guide
By Robbie on June 14, 2009

1. Regard your skill set with self-satisfaction -- as rounded, complete, and impeccable.

2. Imagine that your tiny corner of the world of music is the world of music.

3. Treat the grubby commercial aspects of the profession -- poring over contracts, comparing the fine points of different distribution platforms, self-promotion -- as the province of "the suits."

4. Treat the grubby menial/muscle aspects of the profession -- driving and repairing vans, hauling gear, arguing with promoters, delivering grinning Gene-Kelly-like performances under punishing or humiliating conditions -- as the province of someone else, someone less creative and fragile than yourself.

5. Forget that anyone before you who tried to make a living in the fine arts faced any difficulties. Or that that anyone around you working in more profitable professions (lawyers, engineers, postal workers) ever made any sacrifices.

6. Imagine that the well-known saying "No matter what line of work you're in, you're always a salesman and a bill collector" (thanks to my friend Jordan for teaching me this well-known saying) is suspended for musicians.

7. Imagine that the usual consequences of exploitative sex -- social ostracism if you use it to advance your career, chlamydia if you use it as a giveaway for fans -- are suspended for social-norm-smashing and hormonally-overburdened musicians. In fact, go ahead and sleep with anyone.

8. Resent people with no discernible skill and much discernible money.

9. Take no time to reflect on who you are, what you do well, and how best to present this to strangers -- just do whatever comes to you, which is by definition art, seeing as you are an artist and all.

10. Never forget that all your failures are the doings of a conspiracy of soulless profiteers and knaves, while all of your successes were owed you.
 
#46
jmjbassplayer said:
Christ on a stick! 9 and 11-strings? That's bananas! How can you rock out on something with a neck that wide?? I'd love to see a picture of one.

Ironically both Beck AND Trent often joke with me about getting a many-stringed bass and strapping that bad boy right underneath my chin. Kind of a common joke amongst most musicians in LA, the very intense driftwood, many-band EQ, many-stringed instrument.

I do feel for the guys that enjoy and live that experience...I wonder if it gets tough on sessions when you bring in instruments like that, like if you get weird looks/sniggers. In LA session world, it's pretty broadly taboo.

JMJ

p.s. Confession time: I own a 5-string Fender Deluxe Jazz. Recorded some of the last Garbage album with it, and one other session I can't remember. I keep it around in case there's a request.
Click to expand...

Just to clarify - in the LA session scene, even a five banger is frowned upon? Let's say I turn up for a session or an audition (rock or pop-rock, let's say) with a (fretted) fiver, would they all start rolling on the floor laughing, making jokes and stepping on my shadow?
 
#47
jmjbassplayer said:
Of course they do, and God bless 'em. And those aren't the people I'm referring to. As an example, I'm referring to the many people I've been approached by over the years (at trade shows, via PM, at gigs) who rock that variety of bass (which was the context of me making my joke, I was not referring to a style of music) and ask me how they go about breaking into the kind of work I do. And frankly, it's not going to fly with their many-stringed weapon. Not in my scene, anyway.
Click to expand...

I may have made my point wrong there, I more ment, that these guys, like the two in the vid above(Jean Baudin & Yves Carbonne), I can't imaging them being worried about session work, hired gun stuff, and the like, and if they were, I would expect them to have a more suitable tool for the job, as is, to me, it seems they're making music for their own enjoyment.
 
#48
Chris V. said:
Just to clarify - in the LA session scene, even a five banger is frowned upon? Let's say I turn up for a session or an audition (rock or pop-rock, let's say) with a (fretted) fiver, would they all start rolling on the floor laughing, making jokes and stepping on my shadow?
Click to expand...

Hell no! You'd be fine. But bring a four too. :)
 
#49
Darkstrike said:
I may have made my point wrong there, I more ment, that these guys, like the two in the vid above(Jean Baudin & Yves Carbonne), I can't imaging them being worried about session work, hired gun stuff, and the like, and if they were, I would expect them to have a more suitable tool for the job, as is, to me, it seems they're making music for their own enjoyment.
Click to expand...

Well, I'd like to presume they'd have more suitable tools for the job, if they were interested in hired gun/session work or whatever. And unless each of these guys have sterling solo careers (I don't know them, I can't say) or are just hobbyists, I'd presume they'd likely want work as musicians? It's sort of moot, because this example is all based on blind presumptions, unless you know these guys and what their musical goals are.

Suffice to say: your average producer/artist isn't put very well at ease when they see a boutique piece with that many strings. Hence the need to simplify not only the instrument, but to skillfuly demonstrate your song sensibilities, basic groove, taste, etc. Coming back full circle: I say study as a musician, AND enjoy as a listener, an extremely deep and broad variety of music. Enuf said.

Carry on, y'all.

Best,
JMJ
 
#50
One thing that strikes me about this thread and the idea of playing ERB's is that the term "bass" refers as much to the instrument as it does the player (or what the bass is "playing").

At what point are all of these "extended" range bass instruments just guitars with extended range?

The function of "guitar" is obviously different from a bass....so are ERB's not just ERG's?
 
#53
That is definitely how it is, I would not steer you wrong on this.

Definitely don't be afraid of older/vintage pieces if you can get the scratch together to buy one. That often adds a bit of vibe to your profile with your clients, current and future.
 
#54
jmjbassplayer said:
That is definitely how it is, I would not steer you wrong on this.

Definitely don't be afraid of older/vintage pieces if you can get the scratch together to buy one. That often adds a bit of vibe to your profile with your clients, current and future.
Click to expand...

Between my 60's Hofner, 70's Epiphone and 90's Dearmond they collectively still work out cheaper than my driftwood 5 string ;)


:bassist:
 
#55
jmjbassplayer said:
That is definitely how it is, I would not steer you wrong on this.

Definitely don't be afraid of older/vintage pieces if you can get the scratch together to buy one. That often adds a bit of vibe to your profile with your clients, current and future.
Click to expand...

Thanks a lot of these tips.

Ever since I started browsing this part of TB I've started wondering about buying some vintage basses... I guess if I want to 'get somewhere' I'll have to dig deep and get one. Maybe I can get one for cheap if it's not all original? Anyway, that's for a job for late night Ebay prowling.

Thanks again! :bassist:
 
#56
I think the controversy of this thread has died down - do you mind if I kick it up a bit?

I'm not sure what the "glib bass curriculum from Music School 101" actually teaches - but ALL the "bass master-class/clinic" circuit advice I've witnessed has mirrored the very practical advice given here - and it's all about being a successful SIDEMAN. About becoming HIRE-ABLE by others.

RARELY is the advice given in these environments about developing and pursuing one's own unique artistic vision. This is a huge distinction to me.

Let''s skip the ERB thing for now cuz that's just a black hole of troll-dom waiting to happen.

Let's use Trent as an example.

Let's say instead of pursuing his own artistic vision in making PHM - Trent followed similarly practical advice about a career in music. He's told he needs to find and perfect his vocal RANGE so he can blend into a chorus of singers to "serve the song". That he needs to develop consistency in hitting the right notes etc... All very good, practical advice.

So he takes singing lessons, so he can get a JOB as a perfect jingle singer (to get paid) and parlay that into a maybe a tour as a back-up singer etc.... and chances are we never hear his name or experience his unique gift.

That approach, in my view is the state of advice given at the many bass clinics and master-classes I've attended - and it breaks my heart.

They all approach bass/music as a SIDEMAN pursuit. They teach being a bassist as a utility function rather than an artistic pursuit.

By comparison - Trent is an artist who hires SIDEMEN to execute HIS personal vision.

We need a lot more encouragment of people developing and pursuing their own vision than we need encouraging people to "buy a fender" to "fit in" with the expectations of "average producer".

But as has been said here many times already - to each his own. The world needs both.

We can laugh (I do) at Jaco clones, slap-monkeys and groove-tards.

They are funny cuz they simply mimic.

Same with hipster NYC jazz cats with $7000 Foderas memorizing the Charlie Parker Omni Book rather than developing their OWN voice and musical language.

Hilarious.

But there's another FAR LARGER group that have been ignored here yet are a direct result of this thread's PRACTICAL advice:

The 15,000 guys running around LA with a P-Bass trying to make scratch thumping 8th notes.

Whose got the most "pocket"? Whose got the fattest P-bass sound? Is that really what we signed on for? Maybe, maybe not.

I respect the sideman, the same way I respect a CPA. There's a discipline to following rules, delivering on expectations and doing it for money. That's being a PRO. You want a good CPA doing your taxes like you want a good bassist playing your tunes.

Nashville, NY and LA are filled with musicians like that.

But that type of work doesn't interest me as an artist personally and I hate to see that point of view systematically disseminated as "the way" to young, developing players.

I develop a DEEP emotional connection to the art of people who risk doing their own thing in their OWN voice. Trent is one example. Imogen Heap is another.

There are countless more - and even more still who have failed at it.

I respect them for trying more than the guys playing by the rules.

Sorry - that's how I roll.

Fitting in is easy. Being great a fitting is hard. If you're going to work that hard - why not do it pursuing your own thing?

Will Lee is the most impressive side-man by EVERY measure I can count. A study in sideman-ology!

But trotting out the cliched big dumb fender sound has never once sent a chill down my spine.

Not one time.

But that's just me - and I'm sure I'm wrong. :)
 
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#57
jeff schmidt said:
I'm not sure what the "glib bass curriculum from Music School 101" actually teaches - but ALL the "bass master-class/clinic" circuit advice I've witnessed has mirrored the very practical advice given here - and it's all about being a successful SIDEMAN. About becoming HIRE-ABLE by others.

RARELY is the advice given in these environments about developing and pursuing one's own unique artistic vision. This is a huge distinction to me.
Click to expand...

Well, I think you're right about what is being taught, but I disagree with your point.

You're treating this as an "either / or" situation, when the reality is that it's a "both / and" situation.

ie: You're either hire-able or pursuing your own unique artistic vision.

What you really need to be is: You're both hire-able and pursuing your own unique artistic vision.

Being hire-able will help you eat, get you to meet people who may be able to assist your career, and (if nothing else) is paid practice time.

But playing music that doesn't exactly fit your artistic vision is not 24/7 and if you WANT to pursue your own artistic vision, you will.
 
#60
I buy parts of what you're saying, Jeff, and then I don't. If you look purely at the artistic expression side of things, that's easy. All you have to do for that is have an idea. Getting people to pay you for it is another matter entirely, and if that's what you're looking to do, then there are some things you might want to do to make yourself more hireable. No different than telling your kid that if he wants a job at a restaurant that he better have clean hands and wear something nice.

Anyone can pursue an artistic vision and not make any money at it, which is usually what happens with 99.99% of people and their artistic visions. And there's nothing wrong with that at all if the person is happy. And of the ones who manage to get paid for their artistic visions, then they're subject to marketplace demands as well. So if we're using Trent as an example, it's highly doubtful that he could act upon his artistic vision to do an album of Barry Manilow songs without screwing up what's he's built by doing very un-Manilow-like music. So even someone as independent as Trent still can't just follow every cockamamie idea that pops in his head. He has way more leeway than most, but still...

As for being a sideman, you give its role in music extremely short shrift and I don't dig that. Many artists we hear on the radio today became "artists" by way of being sidemen and doing their own thing on their own time. Many sidemen are remembered forever simply by injecting their vision for their instrument into another person's songwriting vision. Many bands have been ruined by the leader thinking of band members as interchangeable. Bruce Springsteen canning the E Street Band en masse is probably the best known example. How many people talk about guys like Miles and how much his different bands brought to his vision?

The way I see it, you can approach being a sideman as a job or as an art unto itself. Those who see it as an art unto itself elevate themselves and the music they play, plus they get paid. Those who see it as a job just get paid and they bring nothing to the table and take nothing from it besides the money.

If I may toot my own horn, in my line of the sideman world, which is backing up oldies shows, I'm considered easily replaceable. A local guy who would work for a quarter of what I get is available in every state in the country. But I and the guys in my band get flown around the world to back up oldies shows because we treat it as a respected art to be a sideman and we don't punch clocks or complain about the workload (OK, we complain about the workload now and then, but who doesn't?). And we can back up a lot of different artists and make it all sound respectful to the recordings while putting our own unique take on it...I find that pretty artistic myself and I'm pretty proud of it, and if that ain't art to you, sorry.

Would I rather be the central figure and write the songs and rake in the dough and boss everyone around? Who wouldn't? But I get to boss enough people around as a sideman to make me happy :smug: and I have way fewer headaches, and tomorrow I'm going to meet and perform on upright with one of my all-time favorites, rockabilly legend Wanda Jackson, and about 9 other acts from the 50's and 60's, so don't poop in my cornflakes! Bowzer's Rock And Roll Party at the Mohegan Sun Arena in Uncasville, CT tomorrow (Friday) night at 8! (sorry for the cheap plug, Justin...you can edit it out if it's NA).
 

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