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Dating websites : yay or nay?
- Thread starter Thomas Kievit
- Start date
Last time I hugged someone wearing pink capris, I nearly got burned on the neck with a cigarette.
You don't have to resort to that. Just give me a call. I'll sweep you off your feet.
I have a profile on OKCupid. It gets "Liked" a lot. It's not that I think I'm all that and a bag of chips, but I didn't write the same boring, "I'm looking for a nice girl. I'm a really nice guy. I'm into anime and music. Blah, blah, blah" that every desperate dude puts in his profile. Instead, I tried to convey that I am an interesting and worthwhile guy by how I wrote my profile.
With that said, I find online dating extremely awkward, and I say that as an introvert. To me, it's like searching through products on Amazon. When you meet someone in person, you can generally gauge if you have chemistry right off the bat. Sure, there may be something about them that instantly attracts you to them, but it's not like you read through a profile and matched up the features you want in a mate. With online dating, you're testing the waters with someone that seems like you have something prima facie in common with, but it just ends up being awkward with trying to actually create chemistry with someone with whom you have absolutely no history. And writing messages or even talking on the phone is not the same as meeting someone the traditional, organic way.
I have gone on dates via online dating, but I've never had a relationship develop from it. While I have an online profile, I have never really taken it seriously. The hard truth is if you're a guy, the odds are stacked against you. Any mildly attractive or interesting female on a dating site is inundated with messages from all types of guys, from creepers to legitimately good dudes. If you want online dating to work for you, then you seriously have to stand out and be willing to play a numbers game.
This is just my experience as a guy in his early 30s on a free dating site. It shouldn't be taken as being indicative of everybody's experience or empirical research on dating site success.
With that said, I find online dating extremely awkward, and I say that as an introvert. To me, it's like searching through products on Amazon. When you meet someone in person, you can generally gauge if you have chemistry right off the bat. Sure, there may be something about them that instantly attracts you to them, but it's not like you read through a profile and matched up the features you want in a mate. With online dating, you're testing the waters with someone that seems like you have something prima facie in common with, but it just ends up being awkward with trying to actually create chemistry with someone with whom you have absolutely no history. And writing messages or even talking on the phone is not the same as meeting someone the traditional, organic way.
I have gone on dates via online dating, but I've never had a relationship develop from it. While I have an online profile, I have never really taken it seriously. The hard truth is if you're a guy, the odds are stacked against you. Any mildly attractive or interesting female on a dating site is inundated with messages from all types of guys, from creepers to legitimately good dudes. If you want online dating to work for you, then you seriously have to stand out and be willing to play a numbers game.
This is just my experience as a guy in his early 30s on a free dating site. It shouldn't be taken as being indicative of everybody's experience or empirical research on dating site success.
Once one has plucked the fairest rose in the garden, he may admire the stocks of others.
Great, It'll be just like the old lady never left.
Long as you fit her PJ's I'm good. Don't bother shaving, she never did.
I'll bet you do.
I only bothered with a free trial membership on some site like 14 years ago or so. I know dating site algorithms have come a long way since then, but from my very limited experience, it seemed like the odds were stacked specifically against people like me. Every woman was looking for someone nice that can make them laugh, likes outdoor activities, traveling, and recording their lives in idyllic photos. Preferably while traveling. A shining white knight of mediocrity and cliche. The whole time I was thinking, "Geez! Are the only people who look for mates online a bunch of boring normals with the same shallow personalities?! Where are the chicks who like to stay home and smoke weed while listening to death metal?!"
I'm sure that nowadays I could start an account at one of the current sites and meet someone worthwhile, but now I don't even want a girlfriend! Too much PTS from my twenties.....
Met my second wife on E-Harmony and we are very happy, and I didn't have to go through too many near misses. I met my first wife at a party through friends and in the long run we were completely incompatible. Sometimes a little research and a little compatibility goes a long way.
That's if you are looking for someone long term. I never used the interwebs for hookups or one night stands. Not my thang.
That's if you are looking for someone long term. I never used the interwebs for hookups or one night stands. Not my thang.
I wouldn't dismiss it so fast. I believe Ashley Madison, the dating site catering to married couples, is one of the highest, revenue producing dating sites.
Lots of miserable married people out there like me.
Uh - no. Ashley Madison caters to married individuals.
Adjectives - move one and everything changes.
