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Double Bass Don't you ever wish you played flute?

so far only once.

i was going to audition for NEC. so i got off the plane and got my bass at loghan airport in boston. then i figured out there was no way i was getting out of there in a cab with my kolstein case. so then my mom tried renting a minivan or suv, but every single car rental place was out of them. so then we hopped on the hilton airport bus shuttle to take us across the street to the hilton and we left the case with their concierge. we then took a normal minivan cab to our hotel downtown and i did my audition
 
my orchestra once perfrmed for a school of bratty kids with no musical expeirence ever an our condutor let them ask qeustions about the instument and these are some qeustions i got after our conductor told the audience what it was and what it sounded like and that it was not a cello and the pepole infront of me were:
1. is that the way cellos play standing up
2. how much does the bass weigh
3. what is the highest note the bass can reach
4. what is the lowest note the bas can rech
5. why do bassist glue a flute to the top of their instruments in bigger orchestras (c extensions)
6. how much does that cost
7. why do pepole play bass
8. dont bassits always pluck their basses and play jazz music
 
I got "That's a big guitar, mate" so many times (sometimes 3 or 4 a night walking home in Edinburgh) that my girlfriend go me a T-shirt with "That's a big guitar, mate..." printed in the front.
Upon revealing said T-shirt to a would-be comedian, I got an amazed look like I'm Derren Brown.

Best one was when walking home from a guitar gig (with my acoustic guitar), a double-bass playing friend of mine snuck up behind me in the street and said "That's a small double-bass, mate". ;)
 
I got "That's a big guitar, mate" so many times (sometimes 3 or 4 a night walking home in Edinburgh) that my girlfriend go me a T-shirt with "That's a big guitar, mate..." printed in the front.
Upon revealing said T-shirt to a would-be comedian, I got an amazed look like I'm Derren Brown.

Best one was when walking home from a guitar gig (with my acoustic guitar), a double-bass playing friend of mine snuck up behind me in the street and said "That's a small double-bass, mate". ;)

Nice one!
 
NO it was more of just his shock at seeing something like that, because I'm sure he had never seen an EUB, I know if it had been a full size bass he would have recognized it, cuz he was a huge Police fan. He also seemed to be a few cheerios short of a box or a few notes short of a scale if you prefer. Some one told me he had a motorcycle accident and had a lack of short term memory. Weird guy
 
I got "That's a big guitar, mate" so many times (sometimes 3 or 4 a night walking home in Edinburgh) that my girlfriend go me a T-shirt with "That's a big guitar, mate..." printed in the front.
Upon revealing said T-shirt to a would-be comedian, I got an amazed look like I'm Derren Brown.

Best one was when walking home from a guitar gig (with my acoustic guitar), a double-bass playing friend of mine snuck up behind me in the street and said "That's a small double-bass, mate". ;)
i want one of those shirts!!!
 
I have heard all of the above stupid comments about the bass over the years, but I've heard some good ones, especially from people who know what it is. I don't know how many times I've heard, while I'm setting up, "Oh great, a double bass, we have a REAL musician in the house tonight". That kind of comment is much appreciated. Of course I am not averse to harrassing other musicians, and drummers too. One of my favorite lines is to tell the audience that the fiddle / mandolin player picked their instrument before it was ripe. :rollno: