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Dumb CL Ad's pt 5, Dumbester and Dumberest
- Thread starter Thor
- Start date
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- Tags
- band craigslist metal
That's a western Washington area code outside Seattle.
Well, Nine Inch Nails is a reference to the nails driven into Jesus' hands and feet. Ergo- NIN is a christian band....
Some of the song titles have the word God...I think this person doesn't "get it"
Some of the song titles have the word God...I think this person doesn't "get it"
Holy snap!! It seems I'm not the only wingnut out there.
Who would ever sell such a beautiful instrument?!
Yes I always feel so degraded after playing the bass; I have to shower to get rid of the stench of all those low notes.
You too huh? Pass the nitric hydrochloric acid over, that'll help wash the stench away.....
Ha, I live in the area, and saw this. I was confused as to what exactly he wanted to play... any ideas?
http://londonon.en.craigslist.ca/laf/3661993627.html
Found: A Delicious Dinner (Cherryhill Metro)
I found your dinner in a box in the Metro parking lot tonight at 10:45, along with a debit receipt. Head into Metro, tell the nice ladies what you had made for dinner, maybe show them your debit card to prove who you are. It sure looked tasty!
Location: Cherryhill Metro
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Found: A Delicious Dinner (Cherryhill Metro)
I found your dinner in a box in the Metro parking lot tonight at 10:45, along with a debit receipt. Head into Metro, tell the nice ladies what you had made for dinner, maybe show them your debit card to prove who you are. It sure looked tasty!
Location: Cherryhill Metro
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
In: http://toronto.en.craigslist.ca/tor/muc/3630982150.html
In case it's a dead link.....
Singer/Guitarist looking for band members - SYNC'D LIGHT SHOW!
I'm looking for some fantastic musicians to put a band together. This band will be a little bit different than most you're used to seeing or performing with because there will be a programmed light show that is synchronized with the music. Style will be a non-egocentric modern rock, with indie and electronic undertones. Maybe a wee bit of math rock as well. Auditions will be held in the coming weeks.
Musicians I'm looking for include:
- drummer
- bassist
- keyboard player (synth, piano, drawbar organ, rhodes, whatever else)
- guitarist.
If you play another instrument as well, that'd be very keen. I'll be singing and playing guitar in this band, and it'd be great if you had some solid vocal capabilities as well. I'd like to have some sonic diversity so if you feel confident in singing lead vocal from time to time that'd be awesome. If you're a female with a great voice, then that's a huge asset, but it's still very important that you have guitar, bass, drums or keyboard abilities.
Instruments:
For guitarists and bass players - I'm ideally looking for someone who is technically proficient. If you're a master of technique, you'll have a much greater chance of getting this gig. Tapping and slide playing are not something that occurs alot in my music, but if you are well versed in this type of playing then that's great. Multiple tunings will likely be used. I've written songs in E std, D std, B std and drop C, and we'll likely be playing in each of these tunings. I have the following instruments available for whoever I choose to perform in this band:
- multiple guitars
- 5 string active bass
- Yamaha CP300
Amplifiers:
Ideally, I'd like to cut down on the amount of gear to be hauled to each show - and use some sort of rack mounted DI amp, such as a Fractal Axe FX or Line ^ POD HD Pro - but I have the following guitar amplifiers available for the 2nd guitarist and myself:
- Marshall Valvestate 2x12
- Marshall Valvestate 8200 & Traynor YCS412 cabinet
Monitoring:
Most (if not all) musicians in this band will require in ear monitors. We'll be playing to a click and listening for cues in those monitors. We'll also have our own rack mounted 16ch personal monitoring rig on the stage right beside us, which means we'll have full control over our monitor mixes - No more counting on FOH techs to provide us with the right monitor mix. All mixes will be set during rehearsal which means only small tweaks will be needed during sound check before shows. The click track is incredibly important because both our performance and the lightshow will be based off of this sequencer timeline.
Lighting:
Lights wil be controlled with Chauvet ShowXpress within a Macbook Pro, and triggered via midi from Ableton Live. I haven't decided on a final lighting configuration, but fixtures will likely include:
- 10-20 RGB par cans
- 4-6 RGB floor bars
- 2-4 multi coloured moving head spots
All lights will be LED. Spots will either be LED or halogen. Larger venues like Mod Club, Sound Academy and Kool Haus will be icing on the cake as they already have some amazing lighting fixtures available for use. Adding them into the pre-programmed, synchronized light show will make for a really powerful performance.
So there it is. Basically, I want to bring a big, professional rock show into smaller venues. I really want to be a part of a band that uses their time incredibly effectively. I already own all of the gear listed (except the light fixtures) and we can pretty much begin practicing immediately. Musicians will be paid. We'll likely split show money equally.
If you're a positive, energetic, creative, and genuinely awesome individual who plays one of the instruments listed above, I would love to have a chat with you.
If you're not interested in being a part of this band, but know someone who may be, I'd be incredibly appreciative if you could share this.
Thanks very much!
In case it's a dead link.....
Singer/Guitarist looking for band members - SYNC'D LIGHT SHOW!
I'm looking for some fantastic musicians to put a band together. This band will be a little bit different than most you're used to seeing or performing with because there will be a programmed light show that is synchronized with the music. Style will be a non-egocentric modern rock, with indie and electronic undertones. Maybe a wee bit of math rock as well. Auditions will be held in the coming weeks.
Musicians I'm looking for include:
- drummer
- bassist
- keyboard player (synth, piano, drawbar organ, rhodes, whatever else)
- guitarist.
If you play another instrument as well, that'd be very keen. I'll be singing and playing guitar in this band, and it'd be great if you had some solid vocal capabilities as well. I'd like to have some sonic diversity so if you feel confident in singing lead vocal from time to time that'd be awesome. If you're a female with a great voice, then that's a huge asset, but it's still very important that you have guitar, bass, drums or keyboard abilities.
Instruments:
For guitarists and bass players - I'm ideally looking for someone who is technically proficient. If you're a master of technique, you'll have a much greater chance of getting this gig. Tapping and slide playing are not something that occurs alot in my music, but if you are well versed in this type of playing then that's great. Multiple tunings will likely be used. I've written songs in E std, D std, B std and drop C, and we'll likely be playing in each of these tunings. I have the following instruments available for whoever I choose to perform in this band:
- multiple guitars
- 5 string active bass
- Yamaha CP300
Amplifiers:
Ideally, I'd like to cut down on the amount of gear to be hauled to each show - and use some sort of rack mounted DI amp, such as a Fractal Axe FX or Line ^ POD HD Pro - but I have the following guitar amplifiers available for the 2nd guitarist and myself:
- Marshall Valvestate 2x12
- Marshall Valvestate 8200 & Traynor YCS412 cabinet
Monitoring:
Most (if not all) musicians in this band will require in ear monitors. We'll be playing to a click and listening for cues in those monitors. We'll also have our own rack mounted 16ch personal monitoring rig on the stage right beside us, which means we'll have full control over our monitor mixes - No more counting on FOH techs to provide us with the right monitor mix. All mixes will be set during rehearsal which means only small tweaks will be needed during sound check before shows. The click track is incredibly important because both our performance and the lightshow will be based off of this sequencer timeline.
Lighting:
Lights wil be controlled with Chauvet ShowXpress within a Macbook Pro, and triggered via midi from Ableton Live. I haven't decided on a final lighting configuration, but fixtures will likely include:
- 10-20 RGB par cans
- 4-6 RGB floor bars
- 2-4 multi coloured moving head spots
All lights will be LED. Spots will either be LED or halogen. Larger venues like Mod Club, Sound Academy and Kool Haus will be icing on the cake as they already have some amazing lighting fixtures available for use. Adding them into the pre-programmed, synchronized light show will make for a really powerful performance.
So there it is. Basically, I want to bring a big, professional rock show into smaller venues. I really want to be a part of a band that uses their time incredibly effectively. I already own all of the gear listed (except the light fixtures) and we can pretty much begin practicing immediately. Musicians will be paid. We'll likely split show money equally.
If you're a positive, energetic, creative, and genuinely awesome individual who plays one of the instruments listed above, I would love to have a chat with you.
If you're not interested in being a part of this band, but know someone who may be, I'd be incredibly appreciative if you could share this.
Thanks very much!
In: http://toronto.en.craigslist.ca/tor/muc/3735395816.html
In case of dead link. WARNING explicit language, while I edited it for here I can not edit it from the site
Drums Needed, The Pros are not using craigslist.
Seeking drummer for original rock/metal band.
I don't want to call it a hobby but it's not a job either. Face it. The music industry has gone to s*** and the chances of 'making it' are slim to nil. You are one deluded individual if you think you're going to make gold or platinum records.
Influences include anything and everything with some musical integrity.
Bassist is 49, I'm guitars and 34. We jam Vaughn/Woodbridge area usually but anywhere west end we are willing to compromise location.
You should own a car.
I have a day job and so does my bassist. We need a drummer who has one too. We want to meet 1-2x weekly to work through original jams and do live recordings off the floor. If any of those recording are deemed adequate we'll toss them online and gig locally. If they get over a considerable number of hits then we can start to worry about going bigger and touring abroad.
There is no website yet, there is no tour, there is no money to pay you. You need to put money and time into this project to be a part of it. You maybe an awesome drummer and I assure you we are very capable musicians but realistically this is not a job.
You want to be part of this because you love playing drums & love challenging yourself & love writing original tunes instead of butchering a successful band in a cover band scenario. I wonder how many of those cover bands actually pay their royalties to the real bands. If you are looking for money, look elsewhere.
I f****** hate craigslist. To many amateurs that think they're the king s***. A little compromise goes a long way.
I say this as humbly as I can with hopes it wakes up a few of you.
Good luck rookies (myself included). The pro's are not using craigslist.
My expectations from this ad are zero. Please surprise me.
In case of dead link. WARNING explicit language, while I edited it for here I can not edit it from the site
Drums Needed, The Pros are not using craigslist.
Seeking drummer for original rock/metal band.
I don't want to call it a hobby but it's not a job either. Face it. The music industry has gone to s*** and the chances of 'making it' are slim to nil. You are one deluded individual if you think you're going to make gold or platinum records.
Influences include anything and everything with some musical integrity.
Bassist is 49, I'm guitars and 34. We jam Vaughn/Woodbridge area usually but anywhere west end we are willing to compromise location.
You should own a car.
I have a day job and so does my bassist. We need a drummer who has one too. We want to meet 1-2x weekly to work through original jams and do live recordings off the floor. If any of those recording are deemed adequate we'll toss them online and gig locally. If they get over a considerable number of hits then we can start to worry about going bigger and touring abroad.
There is no website yet, there is no tour, there is no money to pay you. You need to put money and time into this project to be a part of it. You maybe an awesome drummer and I assure you we are very capable musicians but realistically this is not a job.
You want to be part of this because you love playing drums & love challenging yourself & love writing original tunes instead of butchering a successful band in a cover band scenario. I wonder how many of those cover bands actually pay their royalties to the real bands. If you are looking for money, look elsewhere.
I f****** hate craigslist. To many amateurs that think they're the king s***. A little compromise goes a long way.
I say this as humbly as I can with hopes it wakes up a few of you.
Good luck rookies (myself included). The pro's are not using craigslist.
My expectations from this ad are zero. Please surprise me.
After running into the re-donkulus once too often I posted this....
Left handed trans- gendered one eyed bagpiper seeks underage angst free triangle player and a right wing Marxist non- aboriginal Didgeridoo player for Led Zepplin tribute. Vocals an asset.
Ideally you live under a box somewhere on the Martin Goodman bike trail and can pick me up for rehearsals.
No freaks
Left handed trans- gendered one eyed bagpiper seeks underage angst free triangle player and a right wing Marxist non- aboriginal Didgeridoo player for Led Zepplin tribute. Vocals an asset.
Ideally you live under a box somewhere on the Martin Goodman bike trail and can pick me up for rehearsals.
No freaks
Almost popped this up but, uh, it was too obvious.
Mainly because I either saw or experienced all of these examples, however it was not to be left dormant. just needed the right forum. And yes the last example is true. Came from someone we had in the band for a while....
*SIGH*
Hey
I'm looking to start a band that'll play nothing but clapped out worn away stragglers from the era of classic rock that the *redacted* has made a living on. Remember the lamer the better
You must be between 21 and 21.2 years of age, live somewhere in, yes in, lake Ontario and have at least one noticeable major personality disorder along with a host of other, lesser maladies that crop up periodically, and also which may or may not be under chemical control, either official or unofficial.
Preferably you suck as a player because it seems that no matter how stringently I word my ads that's all that shows up anyway.
A distinct lack of imagination will also be an asset because if you're not bored out of you're f****** mind yet, you soon will be.
Can you cope with guitarists who forget chord changes? Get only half a solo right? Stop in the middle of a song live because they forgot to come up out of a drop tuning?
Can you deal with bassists who forget to go to the bathroom before getting on-stage for a 45 minute set then need to stop half way thru?
Can you take unrelenting abuse from ego maniacal vocalists who are at best bi-polar paranoid defensive classic case over and over again? Case in point after booting them out try again not once, not twice, but three f****** times all the while hoping for a different result?
Can you deal with drummers who actually put paid to the old joke "How do you know the stage is level?"
Then brother/sister do I have a band for you. Our plan is once all the components are in place, such as they are, we'll spend most of our time posing, doing our hair, and running down all the other bands in the area as being lame.
Once we've achieved that certain 'air' that says we're cool we'll go and take up valuable stage space in an ever decreasing market, thereby spurring on the Pay to Play and PWYC debacle that currently infects the scene.
I know what you're thinking "What about rehearsals?" Well let me tell you that they're a complete waste of time because generally we'll suck so much no amount of practice will help. Don't be overly concerned about gear either, we'll just borrow the gear of whoever else is unfortunate enough to be on the bill with us.
After our first set I'll consider it a win if we get paid and asked not to do the next set. We can continue to do this as it means we'll get paid twice as much for half the work.
Sound like a plan? Good respond to:
Mainly because I either saw or experienced all of these examples, however it was not to be left dormant. just needed the right forum. And yes the last example is true. Came from someone we had in the band for a while....
*SIGH*
Hey
I'm looking to start a band that'll play nothing but clapped out worn away stragglers from the era of classic rock that the *redacted* has made a living on. Remember the lamer the better
You must be between 21 and 21.2 years of age, live somewhere in, yes in, lake Ontario and have at least one noticeable major personality disorder along with a host of other, lesser maladies that crop up periodically, and also which may or may not be under chemical control, either official or unofficial.
Preferably you suck as a player because it seems that no matter how stringently I word my ads that's all that shows up anyway.
A distinct lack of imagination will also be an asset because if you're not bored out of you're f****** mind yet, you soon will be.
Can you cope with guitarists who forget chord changes? Get only half a solo right? Stop in the middle of a song live because they forgot to come up out of a drop tuning?
Can you deal with bassists who forget to go to the bathroom before getting on-stage for a 45 minute set then need to stop half way thru?
Can you take unrelenting abuse from ego maniacal vocalists who are at best bi-polar paranoid defensive classic case over and over again? Case in point after booting them out try again not once, not twice, but three f****** times all the while hoping for a different result?
Can you deal with drummers who actually put paid to the old joke "How do you know the stage is level?"
Then brother/sister do I have a band for you. Our plan is once all the components are in place, such as they are, we'll spend most of our time posing, doing our hair, and running down all the other bands in the area as being lame.
Once we've achieved that certain 'air' that says we're cool we'll go and take up valuable stage space in an ever decreasing market, thereby spurring on the Pay to Play and PWYC debacle that currently infects the scene.
I know what you're thinking "What about rehearsals?" Well let me tell you that they're a complete waste of time because generally we'll suck so much no amount of practice will help. Don't be overly concerned about gear either, we'll just borrow the gear of whoever else is unfortunate enough to be on the bill with us.
After our first set I'll consider it a win if we get paid and asked not to do the next set. We can continue to do this as it means we'll get paid twice as much for half the work.
Sound like a plan? Good respond to:
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
This guy has been posting on Philly CR for months. Disturbing and lonely he is......
This guy has been posting on Philly CR for months. Disturbing and lonely he is......
Seriously.........who starts a band on craigslist??
Normally, you pick up folks who are dissatisfied in other bands or are better than the folks they are currently playing with.
Can anyone give us a sucessful story of a band starting from a cragslist ad??
Normally, you pick up folks who are dissatisfied in other bands or are better than the folks they are currently playing with.
Can anyone give us a sucessful story of a band starting from a cragslist ad??
An ad from Richmond Virginia:
Warwick corvette fna5 bass - $730 (Midlothian )
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
An ad from Los Angeles. You know, on the other side of the country.
Warwick Corvette FNA 5 String Bass - $825 (Valencia)
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
Warwick corvette fna5 bass - $730 (Midlothian )
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
An ad from Los Angeles. You know, on the other side of the country.
Warwick Corvette FNA 5 String Bass - $825 (Valencia)
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
Free shrunken man (Philadelphia)
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
Free shrunken pet man, looking for a good home
Location: Philadelphia
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
Free shrunken pet man, looking for a good home
Location: Philadelphia
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Protools M Box---->!!BOX ONLY!! Does NOT include actual equi - $30 (NE Phila.)
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
RE: FAKE BASS CLOWN (Loaded Neck?)
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
*** is a "loaded neck"? Did you make this up for your counterfeiting operation? I Googled "loaded neck" with the quotes and came up empty so you must have made this term up on your own.
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
*** is a "loaded neck"? Did you make this up for your counterfeiting operation? I Googled "loaded neck" with the quotes and came up empty so you must have made this term up on your own.
Yep.
After my last band crashed and burned last year, the remaining member, Brutus the guitarist convinced me to let him recruit. He came up with Mean Plucker on sizzling guitar in November, guy's about 40, and Vinny the Foot, who is in his mid 60's. retired and has good jazz skills revolving around a ROCK SOLID ONE.
Singer and harp player recruitment has not gone as well, but the core is fine, we all get along, and the level of musicianship is as good as any band I've been in, probably in the top 10% anyway. No egos or drama.
Amazing.
Until we go through the old band name BS thing, the working title is "The Craig's List Turkey's" CLT for short.
Pretty raw, but heavy. No limits set on material.
So yes, it's happened. People have had meteorites hit their houses too, but more frequently I think.
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