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Dumb CL Ad's pt 5, Dumbester and Dumberest
- Thread starter Thor
- Start date
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- Tags
- band craigslist metal
Wow, after reading the ad and subtracting each group of people he eliminated one by one, by my count there are approximately negative twelve musicians in his area that don't suck. :scowl:
a large piece of fur (rabbit?) for an art project ? (Bensalem)
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a large piece of fur (rabbit?) for an art project ? for anything? )
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[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
a large piece of fur (rabbit?) for an art project ? for anything? )
Free Raindbow Shark (Prospect Park/Villanova)
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Hello, I have a free rainbow shark--About 1.5 to 2 inch. Is being bullied just want to find it new home...If possible would like to meet tomm morning to give it or you could pick it up
Location: Prospect Park/Villanova
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
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Hello, I have a free rainbow shark--About 1.5 to 2 inch. Is being bullied just want to find it new home...If possible would like to meet tomm morning to give it or you could pick it up
Location: Prospect Park/Villanova
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Being from Lancaster I can confidently say he's alienated pretty much EVERYONE in the local music scene with this one post. haha
When I first started reading these "Dumb CL" threads, way back when, I was surprised at how angry so many CL posters were. Now, thanks to reading almost all of them here, I've become immune to it. Like snake venom.
I still don't know how these CL posters think they'll find any decent musicians that would want to play with them, when their ads are so angry, and vindictive.
I can see people posting ads that are, hmmm... "grammatically challenged", I mean nobody's perfect, but the egos and attitudes in some of the ads are just crazy.
I still don't know how these CL posters think they'll find any decent musicians that would want to play with them, when their ads are so angry, and vindictive.
I can see people posting ads that are, hmmm... "grammatically challenged", I mean nobody's perfect, but the egos and attitudes in some of the ads are just crazy.
Ah man she didn't even include a pic?? I now find her spiel completely unbelievable.
Holy crap. I just found one of the dumb ads posted here in the sf bay area. Dude keeps posting the same stupid crap. I feel special now.
Lead/rhythm guitar, or sh*tty vocals (santa cruz)
I have a guitar, a loud as f*** amp, and a burning desire to rock the frilly panties off your girlfriend, her girlfriend, and her girlfriend's girlfriend.
360-630-1985
Dylan
I have a guitar, a loud as f*** amp, and a burning desire to rock the frilly panties off your girlfriend, her girlfriend, and her girlfriend's girlfriend.
360-630-1985
Dylan
How's this for a lesson on how NOT to create an ad? Both these were posted on the same day. Which of these two identical basses (save minor condition issues and one including and gigbag and the other a forked up hard shell case) would you buy knowing that purchasing will require direct contact w/ the seller?
Ad #1
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Ad #2
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Ad #1
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Ad #2
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Gigging band needs vocalist - rock (Knoxville, TN)
Let's get a few things out of the way right off of the bat:
NO MULLETS, rebel flags, Lynyrd Skynyrd, AC/DC, Poison, death metal, screamo, hardcore, etc. - No exceptions. Nada. Not gonna do it! Don't ask.
With that said, we'll still get replies from those, but at least we tried.
Please have a full set of teeth (preferably all your own and in your head or at least 99%). Don't have to be a model, but be somewhat interesting to look at for 4 hours. It's not what actually counts, but it helps if people enjoy watching you perform.
Experience is preferred, but not necessary so long as you can bring it when it's time to perform. Above all BE ABLE TO SING. Please don't waste our time and yours. This position requires someone that can step right into the vocalist spot and go with it without days of training and rehearsal. We're not looking for someone we have to teach how to sing and perform.
Be as close to the 21-40 year old age range as possible. 53 is not close to that age range. 16 is not close to that age range. It's all about being able to legally get in to some of the venues we perform at as well as a generation thing. It just won't work if our grandfather is singing for us.
BE DEPENDABLE, PROFESSIONAL, AND RELIABLE. Get to rehearsals. Get to performances on time. Do your part in the labor involved. Represent the band professionally and give it your best. Little to no alcohol prior to and during the performance. Afterwards, you can get as sloshed as you want.
ABSOLUTELY NO ILLEGAL SUBSTANCES; MARIJUANA, 420, POT, THC, CRACK, METH, LSD, COCAINE, UNPRESCRIBED PAIN MEDICATION, ETC. - NEVER AT ANY TIME. PERIOD. NO EXCEPTIONS. - well, that just lost a ton of craigslisters.
About us:
We perform an average of about twice a month; sometimes more. We rehearse about once a week when we're not performing. Fun is our primary motivator and goal. If it's not fun, we're not doing it. We get paid to perform, so not only do we have fun, we walk away with some change in our pockets. We don't take ourselves too seriously, but we give it 100%. We believe in keeping the crowd entertained above all and making them feel at home with us. We're not chasing the dream of a record deal; we've all been there, done that. However, we're not opposed to the idea. The band is self sufficient and pays itself so there is minimal out of pocket expenses from the band members. We're fully equipped with lights and sound for venues without it.
Our show consists of mostly covers with a few originals thrown in. We cover such artists as Theory Of A Deadman, Bob Seger, Finger 11, Luke Bryan, Fuel, Tonic, Seven Mary Three, Neon Trees, Green Day, Breaking Benjamin, Stone Temple Pilots, 3 Doors Down, Jason Aldean, B-52's, Alanis Morrissette, Van Halen, Pearl Jam, Eve 6,... just to name a few and to show our versatile set list. Some of you may know what band we are just by seeing that list. We don't book at dives and if we perform anywhere that gives us grief, we don't perform there again. Remember, it's all about fun. Our show lengths vary depending on the venue and the event; sometimes it depends on how much they're willing to pay. On average, we do a 4 hour show and other members of the band sing songs as well to give the lead spot a break often. We have our own sound technician/roadie so it helps with the labor a great bit.
Why are we seeking a vocalist if we're doing so well? Our singer is having to move away due to work related issues; too far to commute to the band.
Why are we posting of craigslist? So you would read this, be amused, and then bug the crap out of us because you're not what we're looking for, but you figure if you send a thousand e-mail's we'll change our mind.
Other FAQ:
Why does it hurt when I pee?
If I melt dry ice, can I swim without getting wet?
How do you remove a flathead screwdriver from your lower intestines?
Where is Jimmy Hoffa?
Is there a heaven?
Is there a hell?
Is there a heck?
Do you recommend pouring sulfuric acid in your ears to remove unsightly ear hair?
How do you convert a 5.9 liter V8 gasoline engine to a food processor?
Where am I?
My spaceship has crash landed on your planet and I seem to have lost all communications with @8~<<$bl77Ue. Can I borrow your cell phone?
Does the dude abide?
Gigging band needs vocalist - rock (Knoxville, TN)
Let's get a few things out of the way right off of the bat:
NO MULLETS, rebel flags, Lynyrd Skynyrd, AC/DC, Poison, death metal, screamo, hardcore, etc. - No exceptions. Nada. Not gonna do it! Don't ask.
With that said, we'll still get replies from those, but at least we tried.
Please have a full set of teeth (preferably all your own and in your head or at least 99%). Don't have to be a model, but be somewhat interesting to look at for 4 hours. It's not what actually counts, but it helps if people enjoy watching you perform.
Experience is preferred, but not necessary so long as you can bring it when it's time to perform. Above all BE ABLE TO SING. Please don't waste our time and yours. This position requires someone that can step right into the vocalist spot and go with it without days of training and rehearsal. We're not looking for someone we have to teach how to sing and perform.
Be as close to the 21-40 year old age range as possible. 53 is not close to that age range. 16 is not close to that age range. It's all about being able to legally get in to some of the venues we perform at as well as a generation thing. It just won't work if our grandfather is singing for us.
BE DEPENDABLE, PROFESSIONAL, AND RELIABLE. Get to rehearsals. Get to performances on time. Do your part in the labor involved. Represent the band professionally and give it your best. Little to no alcohol prior to and during the performance. Afterwards, you can get as sloshed as you want.
ABSOLUTELY NO ILLEGAL SUBSTANCES; MARIJUANA, 420, POT, THC, CRACK, METH, LSD, COCAINE, UNPRESCRIBED PAIN MEDICATION, ETC. - NEVER AT ANY TIME. PERIOD. NO EXCEPTIONS. - well, that just lost a ton of craigslisters.
About us:
We perform an average of about twice a month; sometimes more. We rehearse about once a week when we're not performing. Fun is our primary motivator and goal. If it's not fun, we're not doing it. We get paid to perform, so not only do we have fun, we walk away with some change in our pockets. We don't take ourselves too seriously, but we give it 100%. We believe in keeping the crowd entertained above all and making them feel at home with us. We're not chasing the dream of a record deal; we've all been there, done that. However, we're not opposed to the idea. The band is self sufficient and pays itself so there is minimal out of pocket expenses from the band members. We're fully equipped with lights and sound for venues without it.
Our show consists of mostly covers with a few originals thrown in. We cover such artists as Theory Of A Deadman, Bob Seger, Finger 11, Luke Bryan, Fuel, Tonic, Seven Mary Three, Neon Trees, Green Day, Breaking Benjamin, Stone Temple Pilots, 3 Doors Down, Jason Aldean, B-52's, Alanis Morrissette, Van Halen, Pearl Jam, Eve 6,... just to name a few and to show our versatile set list. Some of you may know what band we are just by seeing that list. We don't book at dives and if we perform anywhere that gives us grief, we don't perform there again. Remember, it's all about fun. Our show lengths vary depending on the venue and the event; sometimes it depends on how much they're willing to pay. On average, we do a 4 hour show and other members of the band sing songs as well to give the lead spot a break often. We have our own sound technician/roadie so it helps with the labor a great bit.
Why are we seeking a vocalist if we're doing so well? Our singer is having to move away due to work related issues; too far to commute to the band.
Why are we posting of craigslist? So you would read this, be amused, and then bug the crap out of us because you're not what we're looking for, but you figure if you send a thousand e-mail's we'll change our mind.
Other FAQ:
Why does it hurt when I pee?
If I melt dry ice, can I swim without getting wet?
How do you remove a flathead screwdriver from your lower intestines?
Where is Jimmy Hoffa?
Is there a heaven?
Is there a hell?
Is there a heck?
Do you recommend pouring sulfuric acid in your ears to remove unsightly ear hair?
How do you convert a 5.9 liter V8 gasoline engine to a food processor?
Where am I?
My spaceship has crash landed on your planet and I seem to have lost all communications with @8~<<$bl77Ue. Can I borrow your cell phone?
Does the dude abide?
Band Seeks bassist and second guitarist (Philadelphia)
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
We are a band in the Manayunk section of Philly named Pleading Guilty. We're looking for some added depth at guitar and a new bass player. We just finished our first gig on the 13th of April for a hunger charity. We constantly write all the time, practice often. We do have two songs already written so far. IF we had to say what closely emulates our sound it would be a mixture of Kutless, RED, Nine Inch Nails, and other christian bands like that. Yes we are a Christian Rock band, its no gimmick, its what we truly believe in. We do have our on practice space that the church we lead worship for lets us use whenever we want. If this sounds like a band you would like to join, then drop us a line
God Bless as always. 267-481-xxxx
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
We are a band in the Manayunk section of Philly named Pleading Guilty. We're looking for some added depth at guitar and a new bass player. We just finished our first gig on the 13th of April for a hunger charity. We constantly write all the time, practice often. We do have two songs already written so far. IF we had to say what closely emulates our sound it would be a mixture of Kutless, RED, Nine Inch Nails, and other christian bands like that. Yes we are a Christian Rock band, its no gimmick, its what we truly believe in. We do have our on practice space that the church we lead worship for lets us use whenever we want. If this sounds like a band you would like to join, then drop us a line
God Bless as always. 267-481-xxxx
I'm sitting here trying to think of any way that NIN could be considered as a Christian band...not getting anything...
+1 Somehow I don't get where I want to f*** you like an animal could be considered a Christian song. LOL
