Gross things other musicians do.

[baileyboy]

Our overweight guitarist is prone to bending over and showing off his "plumbers crack" when fiddling with his amp. Ugh.

 

[SlapHappy99]

When I play orchestra gigs I always seem to get stuck next to the trombone player. He's a nice guy and everything, but by the end of the night there's a puddle the size of Lake Erie.

 

[PWRL]

Leave streams of barf down the side of my car to be caked on during the two hour drive home.

Oh, and drunkenly relieve themselves on my living room rug.

 

[hintz]

I played with a drummer who'd chew his damn toenails'....barf, gag..... It was so damn nasty, and he'd do it on every break of a rehearsal!!

 

[catcauphonic]

I played with a drummer who'd chew his damn toenails'....barf, gag..... It was so damn nasty, and he'd do it on every break of a rehearsal!!

Winner :***:

 

[Fxpmusic]

Public performances of rusty trombones...

 

[Fxpmusic]

Hanging out after the show at the guitarists place. My sister and her friend go upstairs with him and we don't see them for a few minutes...but man we could hear them. I was mortified. I left. The rest of the band apparently chewed him out for doing that too me. I'm not sure I will ever forget that

The last gig I played with a metal band years ago. I was 20 and dating the guitar player's roommate. Even though I wanted to go home that night, I end up coming back to their place and spend the night with her. She passes out drunk, I go downstairs to get a glass of water and the guitar player and this girl are completely naked, doing it on the kitchen table while the owner of the house (older dude) is sitting on a chair coaching her on what to say and do. The older dude's girlfriend stared in awe across the kitchen.

The morning after, I walk in the bathroom and the girl was sitting in the toilet and got all shy, I said "I saw your insides last night and really don't care. I just gotta brush my teeth". I did not have another meal on that table and hadn't played in a metal band since.

 

[Scott C.]

I played with a drummer who'd chew his damn toenails'....barf, gag..... It was so damn nasty, and he'd do it on every break of a rehearsal!!

Dude must be pretty flexible. I haven't been able to get my feet near my head since I was a little kid.

 

[Hertz]

Playing in a punk band our singer didn't show so the mic was left on stage in case he arrived. Third song in someone emerged from the pit with a snotty bloody nose, grabbed the mic and spewed gelatinous blood all over the mic and stage while belting out some beer fueled nonsense.

Watched skinheads cover beat happenings singer in throat phlegm.

 

[hintz]

Winner :***:

Dude must be pretty flexible. I haven't been able to get my feet near my head since I was a little kid.

By no means did I intend on reinforcing negative stereotypes about drummers, but yeah he at least *was* flexible... not to mention a badass drummer!! Still possibly the grossest thing I can imagine next to people pickin their noses and eating it....

 

[avvie]

I'm not a big fan of bass players who use their nose grease like quick fret.

Sorry, but I do that. It also stops the others ojt there from wanting to come up and jam my rig.

 

[Honch]

No one ever thought of how much spit there are in reagular vocal microphones, and yet they share them onstage. YUCK!
Maybe we should bring these hazardous ground lifts back into the mics? So if they touch the mic with their lips or tounge they get this JOLT! Will teach them...

I don't know if gross counts for just being drunk on stage. No matter how cleaned up etiquette, or well dressed and well behaved on stage, when musicians are soo out of tune, and yet continues playing, and pretends they're not out of tune, gives me the chills moreso than any puking on stage...well then, they're not musicians. Mainly, musicians that thinks they're "something" on stage and takes to much space literally, by flailing and jumping around and don't mind if they bump into things. I'll stop playing and leaves the band immediately.

 

[JaketheB]

Mid 90's - I was at a regional music show in San Jose, CA.

We had a small Trace Elliot bass stack set up for people to try, along with some Hamer basses. We had a few guitar picks for people to use sitting on top of the amp.

A guy comes up, takes a pick and puts it fully into his mouth, plays a bass for a few minutes, then takes the pick out of his moth and puts it back on the top of the amp as he's leaving. He never used the pick - he just sucked on it.

This is me every time I have the bright idea to play with a pick. Get bored, shove it in mouth.

 

[Medicine Man]

A couple years ago my drummer was sick at a gig and fouled his breeches, so to speak. Finished the gig like a real man, though. Oh the stank.

 

[Lazylion]

Well, mine was a drummer who used to pull his bubble gum out of his mouth in a long string, then stuff it back in, over and over. But I see now that isn't all that gross after all, comparatively speaking.

So, yeah, nevermind. Carry on...

 

[marko57]

haha 100%!! My brother and I toured the Maritimes with our three piece rock band, and we played a show at a greasy little bar in Moncton, NB. It was a rowdy little booze-fueled function, and after our set a group of regulars came up and said "so who got the smelly mic?", both my brother and I shrugged and pointed out that the bar's house mic was laying on the stage in the corner. They got a good chuckle out of that, because apparently the night before some touring lunatic's stage antics included dropping the mic down the back of his sweaty buttcrack and then fishing it back out by yanking on the cable.

Luckily, we both brought our own mics and passed the fresh-breath test haha!

Our singer's, on more than one occasion after band practice, use of his mic on his various lady friends was legendary. Which is why my mic got packed up and went home with me after every practice!

 

[Hopkins]

I played with a drummer who'd chew his damn toenails'....barf, gag..... It was so damn nasty, and he'd do it on every break of a rehearsal!!

So how did this work, did he strike a yoga pose and just gnaw one of them off, or clip one off and gnaw on it?

Either way, I couldn't be friends with that guy

 

[Hopkins]

Sorry, but I do that. It also stops the others ojt there from wanting to come up and jam my rig.

How greasy is your nose? My nose leaves no residue

 

[d-dave]

Are you sure it was spit? I played trumpet for six years and they have what we call "spit release" valves. But in actuality it isn't spit (unless you're purposefully spitting into it ), just a buildup of water vapor that gets blown in over time.

Dude... I played tuba for 6 years. I'm sorry, but you're delusional. It's spit. It is not water vapor. It is a condensate of the moisture within your mouth that gathers in the bends and turns of the metal tubing that make up your instrument. And that moisture within your mouth? It's not water. It's spit. Horn players call them spit valves for a reason.

P.S.: Tuba = MUCH bigger mouthpiece = MUCH more lip crammed inside = MUCH more spit. Band rooms smell funky for a reason.

 

[karl_em_all]

I frequently break wind at gigs. In my defense, I usually walk over by the drummer when I do it.

Totally acceptable