Let's spread some musical misinformation

[ZenG]

All bass body parts, necks, strings, hardware, pups, tuners are interchangeable.

Once you know this you can build any bass you want easily.

 

[GBassNorth]

Damn! Now I'm really screwed! Driving home after the gig last night and my Vintage Mosrite bass fell out of the back of the truck. It hit the pavement pretty hard.
Fortunately it was in its case, but it still looks like a lot of damage was done. Not sure where the other pickup went, but I think it slid under the neck pickup. Any ideas on how to fix this?
Before...

After...

 

[ZenG]

Due to gig pressures and sightreading, many bass players suffer from pre-extrapolation.

There is help available by seeing a therapist.

 

[GBassNorth]

Due to gig pressures and sightreading, many bass players suffer from pre-extrapolation.

There is help available by seeing a therapist.

Doctors Warning - If your extrapolation lasts for more than 4 hours seek immediate medical help!

 

[ZenG]

Whenever you record a song but are unsure of your skills and know there will be quite a few mistakes...simply overdub a loud track of people talking in a restaurant.
You'll get the chatter of people talking as well as the noisy clatter of waiters and dishes in the background and nobody will notice where you went wrong.

A second choice would be to dub a SuperBowl soundtrack of any year over it...you'll just need to leave out the halftime show.

 

[ZenG]

Researchers at Buttzild University converted every known rock and popsong's music and lyrics to a common data source and fed it to an experimental program designed to distill all information into a single song.

The song turned about to be " Viva The Stairway To Billie Jean's Las Vegas Summer Place"".

 

[zontar]

All music should be free...

 

[ZenG]

Nostradamus predicted the future for 2018:-

" and in the year of 2000 plus 18, an entity known in those times as Dubstep will arise from the ashes like a Phoenix and dominate mankind. The citizens of world metropolia will be giddy and crazed,abandoning all rational thought as they seek the heady swoon and inebriation of dance. They shall not know sanity and will fall by the wayside and expire from exhaustion, unable to end the toxic allure..."

 

[zontar]

If you sing better with a cold you need to be sick all the time

 

[ZenG]

If you play bass and find that you now don't play as good as you used to years ago....just hang on.

History always repeats itself and if you wait for awhile you'll be just as good as you used to be.

 

[Tom Bomb]

Damn! Now I'm really screwed! Driving home after the gig last night and my Vintage Mosrite bass fell out of the back of the truck. It hit the pavement pretty hard.
Fortunately it was in its case, but it still looks like a lot of damage was done. Not sure where the other pickup went, but I think it slid under the neck pickup. Any ideas on how to fix this?
Before...

After...

Just get stoned, dude. It'll reappear, out of the blue. And the neck pickup will straighten right up.

 

[jmlee]

Truss rods were originally developed to apply tension to abdominal hernias. In 1957, while Leo Fender was undergoing hernia treatment, he was asked by a colleague, "Hey Leo! That a truss rod in your pants or are you happy to see me?" He was so struck by the comment that he limped back to his shop and the modern trussrod-supported guitar neck was born. In later years he would reminisce fondly about that moment, recalling that, "I still can't bear down to have a crap, but it's great that guitars are more resistant to the change of seasons."

 

[zontar]

Playing guitar will make your ears fall off.

 

[Imaginary Pony]

Drum soloists are worse than bass soloists.

If you combine a drum solo track and a bass solo track, you will not know that they are solo tracks these days.

If you add any guitar solo track plus any vocal solo track to those two tracks, you will think it is Prog rock. If everyone playing wears black then its Alernative rock.

If the players are all wearing shorts and two ear-rings as well as dock shoes...then you are at a weekend farm festival where no-one is getting paid but just glad for the chance to be there and play.

This should be in the Band Management thread.

 

[Imaginary Pony]

They say Lemmy had a pick glued to his fingers for extra speed.

No, his picks were made out of speed, which he absorbed through his fingers.

 

[Imaginary Pony]

Mona Lisa's enigmatic smile has baffled art lovers for centuries. "What is she smiling at?" they have debated. The secret has now been revealed...

She was sitting on Leonardo's 4x10 bass cab whilst he played the intro to "whole lotta lova".

 

[Jay2U]

D'addario consider discontinuing their Chromes, as bass players found out that dead roundwounds sound just like flatwounds.

 

[Bassnomer]

Leo intended the E string to be used only as a thumb rest. He thought the bass looked strange with only three strings.

 

[Bassnomer]

Tonewood.

 

[Bassnomer]

People care about the bass tone.