Let's spread some musical misinformation

[felonious69]

Playing a fretless can cause pimples on your hand, and eventual blindness

It also sticks the pages of your "music" book together

 

[felonious69]

The exact position of the dead spot on the G string of a bass can be easily calculated by multiplying the square of the string gauge with the square root of the scale length, devided by the width at the bridge minus the width at the nut, multiplied by the sum of the weight of the body, the neck and the tuners, devided by the number of frets, shifted by the difference between the actual tuning and a standard EADG tuning. It can also be estimated, resulting in fret #7.

Bassists never have a problem finding that G spot

 

[PillO]

Canadian amps only go to 8 1/2

Just not true. Canadian amps go up to 13. And Canadian watts are 37% louder than US watts.

 

[felonious69]

Just not true. Canadian amps go up to 13. And Canadian watts are 37% louder than US watts.

Sure, now, with this GREAT wattage economy

 

[NZBassman]

if you turn a left hand bass around the other way and play it right handed, you can only play songs backwards - from the last note to the first

 

[zontar]

Just not true. Canadian amps go up to 13. And Canadian watts are 37% louder than US watts.

American amps make you pee more often.

 

[-Asdfgh-]

The members of GWAR run a daycare as their day job

Yes, but it's for orcs!

 

[felonious69]

ALL of John Bonham's solos were lip-synched.

 

[felonious69]

American amps make you pee more often.

Yeah but Canadians can only play in the key of Ay
(Whad'ya say we paly a song dare, ay?)

 

[felonious69]

Female singers can lip-synch twice as fast.

 

[felonious69]

Gene Simmons actually started out in life as Jean Simmons. She was ugly too (hence all the makeup)

 

[felonious69]

if you turn a left hand bass around the other way and play it right handed, you can only play songs backwards - from the last note to the first

And only in the key of 3

 

[felonious69]

Oh just great! I rearranged my pedal board a while back and stupidly left this...
View attachment 2860421

Too close to this...
View attachment 2860422
Now I have a bunch of these running around the studio...
View attachment 2860423
Thought about tying the tubes on the muff pedal but it's SS. Guess I'm gonna have to snip the Pickle pedal instead.

If you snip just the tip off the Pickle it'll be kosher

 

[felonious69]

The most important bass states:

State of Emergency
State your name
State Mint
S-State
State isticks
Stay Tuh

Don't forget "State your name for the court record"

 

[felonious69]

Pickle juice will cure bass face. Doesn't take much, just a few ounces and it works almost immediately.
See, no more bass face:
View attachment 2607237

I've dated "four-eyes", but a gal with two mouths? COULD BE OK!

 

[felonious69]

Gibsons are always so expensive, cuz wood doesn't grow on trees, ya know

 

[felonious69]

It is possible to tune a piano and tuna fish.

You have to de-scale them

 

[felonious69]

The T-40 bass was named after the P-40 fighter. The T-51 was never produced but would have allowed you to play faster and for twice as long.

TheT-40's, like the P-40 Warhawks also had huge gnashing teeth

 

[felonious69]

I can't find page 404 of this thread anymore.

(Not Responding)

 

[felonious69]

Especially over troubled water.

Back in the 60's they had protests and burned bridges, and look where that got us now.
Wait...Bras...never mind