Low drama hobby bands - share your tips

[FullumMusic]

Low drama often means adjusting your own expectations.

So much this. Also, if at all possible, making sure the other people in the band are also capable of this.

Also also, being very explicit with your (and other people their) expectations is helpful. For example, saying, "We're a hobby band" can mean different things to each member of the band. One might think it's gonna be fun hanging out and drinking some beer while playing tunes. Another might have an expectation of playing shows regularly and really nailing the songs with little expectation of commercial success but still a level of professionalism and skill. Those two will start resenting each others' work ethics. But if everyone's really explicit about what they're looking for out of the band as a whole, and each practice, or rehearsal, or show, or schedule, then you all can start to align your expectations, or realize the things you expect are way off base from each other and you'll all be happier in different situations (aka different bands) that come closer to your expectations, all the while everyone being able to adjust theirs to what everyone else can offer with their own.

Also also also, it might not be the most helpful suggestions, but when i smell too much drama on the horizon, i just quit the band.

 

[Wesley R]

In the past I was the BL, and we formed a band that had some democracy going. One member booked some gigs and wanted to be Mickey. It was a smooth transition and I enjoyed the heck out of it.

 

[juancaminos]

1. Split the work and the money fairly. This could mean evenly, or people who do more work, such as booking or hauling a pa, make more money. Discuss these expectations upfront.

2. Address drinking or substance abuse problems immediately. Address reliability problems immediately.

3. Have processes in place for how the band is managed, whether that is a totalitarian band leader, or democratic process. Be upfront about it, like "we will listen to all your song suggestions, but Tim has the final say," or "we usually only book 3 shows a month, but it could be more in summer." Most strife comes from people having different goals or expectations.

4. Shows before hos. Set expectations for professionalism, but dont forget to have fun because hobby band. Set expectations for fun but don't forget about professionalism, also because hobby band.

5. Be a strong band leader. This is the same as any other strong manager. Listen to the opinions of your people, but be decisive.

6. Less talented people who work hard and are a good hang make better band members than virtuoso primadonnas. If you must have one, one is plently, and you should waste the "primadonna" slot on a singer.

7. Fire the drummer.

This, but add a #8 for stage appearance. Baseball caps, shorts, tee shirts, pants with holes in the knees. From there to what does a clean set up look like to you (wires, cables, nice amps).

 

[dbsfgyd1]

I'd love to hear strategies and tips from folks that have succeeded in having low drama hobby bands, whether now or in the past. How have you dealt with personnel changes, changes in direction, varying levels of interest over time, substance use, attitude, differences in opinion, and even your own attitude about the project?

Long story short I've done well managing my past bands from a logistical and financial standpoint, and in my next band I plan to be the band leader, host rehearsals, decide the material. As stated it'll be a hobby band - just playing for fun and mental stimulation outside of the 9-5, M-F work schedule.

I find that playing these days is more of less a hobby. Hobbies however cost money and playing paying gigs foots the bill for gear, transportation, lodging, recording, and publishing costs.

Our band has been in existence since the mid 60's, I joined in 71. Most of the members in our band have other outside musical interests as this is an accomplished line up. We are also a good hang with little or no drama. Since most members have over 25 years of experience and it's a cover band, everybody knows what their job is. Nobody has to micro manage someone else's parts.

As for malcontents, bad actors, substance abusers, generally they tend to wash out. In the last 12 years we had a Keyboardist who after playing in the band for 5 years for some reason decided he want to be the highest paid member of the band or else. "Else" was he was replaced by the best keyboardist in town. We'd have to go back 30 years to find the next one washed out.

 

[Isaac_James]

I'd love to hear strategies and tips from folks that have succeeded in having low drama hobby bands, whether now or in the past. How have you dealt with personnel changes, changes in direction, varying levels of interest over time, substance use, attitude, differences in opinion, and even your own attitude about the project?

Long story short I've done well managing my past bands from a logistical and financial standpoint, and in my next band I plan to be the band leader, host rehearsals, decide the material. As stated it'll be a hobby band - just playing for fun and mental stimulation outside of the 9-5, M-F work schedule.

Being upfront about what your priorities are for being in a band. If two people in the band are doing it just because it's fun, but another person is doing it for money/recognition/acclaim, then you are setting yourselves up for a conflict. I've made it clear to my bandmates that I am playing in this group because it's fun, and I'll keep doing it as long as I can while it's still fun, but if it ever stops being fun then I will walk away. But I've been in a band where we weren't all on the same page about that and it got very stressful until it just broke apart abruptly.

 

[Kerry Brown]

In a hobby band you have to be flexible. You will play songs you may not like. You will have disagreements. You have to expect this. You have to respect your bandmembers even when you disagree. If you can't handle this a hobby band may not be for you.

 

[WI Short Scaler]

I didn't read all the posts in the thread but did get though most of them.

If it's a small time "hobby" band be sure that's what everyone wants going in.

We practice because it's a fun reason to make some music and improve the group. Seems from reading through alot of TB that many folks are in the "no practice" camp.

Our group, we were all friends going into it so we knew what to expect. We enjoy the hang as much as the music. Truly I feel blessed to have this "hobby" that pays for itself and then some.

And if possible find one member with OCD who believes they're the only one that can do things right because they'll do the majority of the work. Just be willing to share some extra $$ with them at the end of the gig. Spoiler, I am that person and they do, so it all works.

 

[sean_on_bass]

I'd love to hear strategies and tips from folks that have succeeded in having low drama hobby bands, whether now or in the past. How have you dealt with personnel changes, changes in direction, varying levels of interest over time, substance use, attitude, differences in opinion, and even your own attitude about the project?

Long story short I've done well managing my past bands from a logistical and financial standpoint, and in my next band I plan to be the band leader, host rehearsals, decide the material. As stated it'll be a hobby band - just playing for fun and mental stimulation outside of the 9-5, M-F work schedule.

Essentially everyone has to have the mind set that this is for fun, and not for money or to compete with the best professional bands in your locale. One issue i see with your idea is that you want to lead the band and decide the material. If i join a band for fun, i surely want to be able to pitch in my own ideas for tunes to play, so make sure you provide that opportunity. Also keep the schedule light and don't put too many demands on the players. I find that when you start to have alot of gigs on the books and in turn pressure, the hobby types freak out a bit and either back out or become clouds of anxiety.

 

[Pocket Dave]

I'd love to hear strategies and tips from folks that have succeeded in having low drama hobby bands, whether now or in the past. How have you dealt with personnel changes, changes in direction, varying levels of interest over time, substance use, attitude, differences in opinion, and even your own attitude about the project?

Long story short I've done well managing my past bands from a logistical and financial standpoint, and in my next band I plan to be the band leader, host rehearsals, decide the material. As stated it'll be a hobby band - just playing for fun and mental stimulation outside of the 9-5, M-F work schedule.

Might want to rethink that "decide the material" part. Hobby bands usually involve more choice-participation from everyone in the band in the absence of other compensation.

Difference in opinions, substance use, attitude, varying levels of interest over time? No way to control much, if any of that once you're underway, but you can try your best to pick bandmates where there's some common ground to begin with.

Otherwise, I try to practice some level of acceptance until it's apparent that it's not going to be a sustainable situation for me. Then I'll try to be honest and see if there's a chance to adjust and rediscover common ground, or, in the case of a hobby band, try to give a respectful reason for my exit.

Disclaimer: I'm not currently in, nor seek to be in a hobby band.

 

[alex1fly]

Disclaimer: I'm not currently in, nor seek to be in a hobby band.

Want to join one? It'll only be a 14ish hour commute each way.

 

[Ostie]

Maybe, maybe not. I've spent a lot of years in bands happy as a clam to show up, play with others, and not have to make any decisions. So maybe what I'm looking for is folks that, like me of yesteryear, want to be led.

If I was going to play in a hobby band, I’d want some input on song selection. I think you’re asking a lot for a hobby band to be your back-up band. But good luck with your project, hope it works out for you.

 

[Zooberwerx]

*Opposites attract...likes endure. Make sure it's a good hang.

*Work around the available talent and select appropriate material.

Riis

 

[Stinsok]

Avoid the narcissist!

 

[packhowitzer]

The last "low drama" band I was in had the most fun when we were playing/jamming/rehearsing in our rehearsal space. We'd lock in and play and it was honestly pretty great. BUT unless we had a gig of *some* kind every once in a while, it sort of lost focus. Honestly none of us really wanted to play gigs but we all agreed that without about 6 gigs a year, that we just lost momentum and lost the ability to have that focus that made the rehearsing so good. So... we'd keep the occasional benefit gig or bar gig or house party on the schedule and it helped stay driven just enough to get that dopamine hit that we craved when we were in our private space doing what we loved doing most. YMMV, but it's what worked for us and I just wanted to share it here.

 

[fdeck]

I've participated in some hobby bands that have been quite rewarding. I think the trick is that a band's commercial expectations, and behavioral expectations, are independent from one another. It's possible for a band to be non-commercial by mutual agreement, while still holding to basic professional standards of conduct. What I mean is along the lines of: "Everything I know about being a professional musician, I learned in middle school band." Such as, showing up on time, having your **** together, being respectful, and whatnot. Even a hobby band can be treated as a commitment.

A hobby band can have a leader, but that person needs to have a reason to exist, such as composing the band's material, or actually being talented as a leader. Owning the rehearsal space is a qualification, but a weak one.

 

[gstaats]

I've had good luck being super straitforward with communications and expectations. For me, things I'm blunt about

• My family, day job and personal commitments come before the band
• Gigging and rehearsal expectations
• Quality of musicians I expect (if an original project that is going to release an ep or two, gotta play with a click or metronome for tracking)
• Those with substance issues, without equipment, without transportation or expecting to be the next big thing need not apply

An audition is a lot like an interview. Don't be afraid to have high expectations. Settling will only lead to problems in the future.

 

[Pdaddy1978]

I stopped "gigging" 20 years ago...
It took about 5 years to get the bile out of my system, and then I got together with a couple of old friends, that I've played with for years, that are at a similar place in their lives, and we just play for the joy of it.
The drummer still has a studio behind his house, with a PA in it, and the guitarist has a IPOD set up with 10,000 song lyrics in it, and we just call tunes.
After 30 years of gigging.....Ive found my bliss.

 

[MultiScaleMale]

No matter how big or small it may be, split the money evenly and promptly.

 

[mike buzzetti]

No such things ALL bands have drama at one time or another. sorry no advice really.

 

[BAG]

Long story short I've done well managing my past bands from a logistical and financial standpoint, and in my next band I plan to be the band leader, host rehearsals, decide the material. As stated it'll be a hobby band - just playing for fun and mental stimulation outside of the 9-5, M-F work schedule.

If you are the band leader and not paying support players, you already have set the table for drama in a band. Just by picking the material you are setting your self up for drama. IMHO.

That was my thought too.

As long as you are flexible OP, suggesting songs to play isn't a problem, but if it's just for fun as you state then being prepared to play songs others bring to the table is probably going to be a necessity.

I've been lucky enough to have a zero drama band for the last 3 or more years. We get together in my studio once a week or so and play some music we generally all like and we also do the occasional gig.
In general we avoid telling others what and how to play, occasionally one of us (usually me) might suggest something to make the song better, but it's pretty rare.

In my view, a band leader will call the shots because they get the gigs and do all the work so the others can just show up and play their part. When it is just for fun you probably need to let everyone have a say.