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My Wife Poses the Ultimate Question
- Thread starter BigAlBass69
- Start date
Do you REALLY NEED another bass?"
She has said that to me a few times...as a joke...because she knows better...
I usually say Hell no...but I really wanted it, after I told her it is on the way so please be home so you can sign for it.
The bigger question is always...Do we really need another boat?
She has said that to me a few times...as a joke...because she knows better...
I usually say Hell no...but I really wanted it, after I told her it is on the way so please be home so you can sign for it.
The bigger question is always...Do we really need another boat?
Some people fly to Colorado and ski for a week in winter. Cost? Maybe two designer basses per event.
Some folks fly to Hawaii and spend a week in a condo? Cost? Maybe two more designer basses.
Some folks go to pro football games. Cost for two tickets, parking and food? At least one moderately expensive bass, around $1000.
Things are relative. If your idea of a vacation splurge is a second order of curly fries with your Arby's burger, basses are expensive. If your recreation or elective purchases are a bit more expensive, then put the bass into context with that.
Me, I have a dozen basses but only two cost over $1000. Those were big time purchases for me, as I find that I can buy very nice instruments for under $1000. I played my last gig with a Dean Cabbie that cost $260 on Ebay.
Some folks fly to Hawaii and spend a week in a condo? Cost? Maybe two more designer basses.
Some folks go to pro football games. Cost for two tickets, parking and food? At least one moderately expensive bass, around $1000.
Things are relative. If your idea of a vacation splurge is a second order of curly fries with your Arby's burger, basses are expensive. If your recreation or elective purchases are a bit more expensive, then put the bass into context with that.
Me, I have a dozen basses but only two cost over $1000. Those were big time purchases for me, as I find that I can buy very nice instruments for under $1000. I played my last gig with a Dean Cabbie that cost $260 on Ebay.
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Inserting this quote as a proxy for all the similar comments:
Even though it won't help, it's 1000% true. Basses are just harder to hide, more useful and have a better resale value. My wife buys stuff all the time and doesn't even tell me about it. I'm cool with that, but I am not going to dance around the issue which is that I don't have to sit there and justify every purchase unless I turn into some kind of hoarder (I'm not...I have 5 basses and an upright...oh and two guitars lol). But you don't have to do it my way, every relationship is different. If you two have a common conception of how money and purchases work between you, then just go with it. But I think asking you if you "need" another bass is an impossible question. She knows the answer before she asks it.
Even though it won't help, it's 1000% true. Basses are just harder to hide, more useful and have a better resale value. My wife buys stuff all the time and doesn't even tell me about it. I'm cool with that, but I am not going to dance around the issue which is that I don't have to sit there and justify every purchase unless I turn into some kind of hoarder (I'm not...I have 5 basses and an upright...oh and two guitars lol). But you don't have to do it my way, every relationship is different. If you two have a common conception of how money and purchases work between you, then just go with it. But I think asking you if you "need" another bass is an impossible question. She knows the answer before she asks it.
"Some guys get with hookers and do cocaine. I occasionally buy a piece of bass gear while staying sober and faithful to my wife. Take yer pick."
Until a pattern emerges where all of your old bass collecting friends keep dying off.
It's important to understand the motive for the question:
If it's just about space, it's all good as you have a tangible issue to deal with in a practical manner (e.g. "I'm clearing space in the attic/basement/garage/kid's wardrobe for <insert item of choice> to make space for the new bass") - just remember not to encroach upon any space she considers to be hers;
If it's about budgeting - does she have a point? If so, is there something you can give up or sell to justify the expense? (e.g. "I'm not getting a season ticket to the <sports team of choice> this year to offset the cost of the bass" or "I'm selling my left kidney to pay for the bass"). If you can afford it without making sacrifices, just allay her fears and go through your budgeting strategy with her. Either she'll be ok or she'll die of boredom after the first 30 seconds of your exposition, and boring someone to death is not usually an indictable offence, though you may need to check whether this is the case in your jurisdiction;
If it's about perceived spousal neglect (financial or emotional), you've got a HUGE issue that needs addressing right now if there's any justification for the perception, no matter how insignificant it may seem to you (unless you enjoy either living in a dysfunctional relationship, going through the fun of divorce, or waking up with a kitchen knife in your ribcage). If there's no justification whatsoever, you may be married to a narcissistic psychopath. Run for the hills!
If it's just about space, it's all good as you have a tangible issue to deal with in a practical manner (e.g. "I'm clearing space in the attic/basement/garage/kid's wardrobe for <insert item of choice> to make space for the new bass") - just remember not to encroach upon any space she considers to be hers;
If it's about budgeting - does she have a point? If so, is there something you can give up or sell to justify the expense? (e.g. "I'm not getting a season ticket to the <sports team of choice> this year to offset the cost of the bass" or "I'm selling my left kidney to pay for the bass"). If you can afford it without making sacrifices, just allay her fears and go through your budgeting strategy with her. Either she'll be ok or she'll die of boredom after the first 30 seconds of your exposition, and boring someone to death is not usually an indictable offence, though you may need to check whether this is the case in your jurisdiction;
If it's about perceived spousal neglect (financial or emotional), you've got a HUGE issue that needs addressing right now if there's any justification for the perception, no matter how insignificant it may seem to you (unless you enjoy either living in a dysfunctional relationship, going through the fun of divorce, or waking up with a kitchen knife in your ribcage). If there's no justification whatsoever, you may be married to a narcissistic psychopath. Run for the hills!
I am much happier with one bass than I ever was with multiple basses. So basically I'm a woman's dream bassist husband
I shut my wife up by pointing out that all of the gold and diamonds I bought her cost twice as much as my instruments and gear.
If the parrot is louder than the bass then you need a new amp too!
But his wife would rather take the vacation than have him buy another bass
Tit for tat works for me. Find something she wants of similar worth and get them both. Everybody's happy. It's also all worked into the budget.
Just tonight I had to get permission for a bass model and color I'd been looking for about 8 months. A viable deal just pop up on the radar. Mentioned it to her and she said glad you brought it up. I want to get Botox for my forehead. Great, a fixer upper and a new bass. What more could a guy want.
Just tonight I had to get permission for a bass model and color I'd been looking for about 8 months. A viable deal just pop up on the radar. Mentioned it to her and she said glad you brought it up. I want to get Botox for my forehead. Great, a fixer upper and a new bass. What more could a guy want.
Full disclosure, we share multiple accounts due to tax purposes but we still respect each other in regards to expenditures and impact on the family. Until recently there simply was no disposeable income, especially after the crrash in 2008. However, we have made a comeback and have been able to set things right. We enjoy travel immensely so that is where the majority of that income goes. However, we both allow each other a bit of fun money for extravagances. I work an extrtemely high pressure job with standard 14 hour days and over the years have tried many many things to offset that pressure, some more harmful than good. One day I reached into the closet, found my 1974 P Bass, restrung and set it up and finally found my Nirvana. This has lead to my current GAS but truth be told, based on all that has occurred, I remain very frugal and practical. I grew up very poor so the idea of having more than one of ANYTHING still remains a foreign concept for me. Nevertheless, I continue to seek that ONE LAST THING THAT WILL COMPLETE MY COLLECTION. So here I am. I respect the serious comments and the humorous comments. It is good to have this newfound community.
LIVE LAUGH LOVE. There is no guarantee for tomorrow and material things really don't matter. PEOPLE DO! HELP YOUR BROTHER
LIVE LAUGH LOVE. There is no guarantee for tomorrow and material things really don't matter. PEOPLE DO! HELP YOUR BROTHER
Gotta say...I have an amazing wife! I was tired of lugging a heavy combo amp around to gigs along with my upright bass. We both heard an Acoustic Image Ten2 and I told her that was THE amp! Unfortunately it was $1700!! When I found a lightly used on on Craigslist for $1000, I told her that I could save us $700 and she was excited that I was actually getting it! So...now if I can get the agreement on a used Kay upright...I'll be set...for a while that is!
