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Phone call?

In pondering this phenomenon it occurs to me that the marked increase in internet courtship means an increasing percentage of existant couples typed at one another prior to first speaking. Courtship such as this necessarily creates anxiety about conversation representing a step to deeper intimacy.

Tl;dr jumping on the phone with a stranger is just wayyy too fast
 
Not meaning to be rude or condescending, but before I let somebody into my world at this point in my life, I want to know all I possibly can about them ... music is fun, but it is also a business to many folk, especially to those that have been at it a while and are done with all the 'getting to that point' stages ... you may live 10 minutes away, but IF you are expecting an invitation into HIS house/practice space/studio (or whatever), he has every right to be extremely comfortable with who he is inviting in (and any baggage/history/crowd) they may associate with ... of course an alternative, is for him to come sit down with you, in YOUR space, I have done that many times in the business world (how a person lives tells a lot about them) .. however if you have multiple candidates, a relatively quick phone conversation can be the perfect precursor as well as very time effective towards eliminating candidates that obvously will not fit ...

JMHO .. as always
 
I Use the telephone very specifically as a filter. In a world where I'm surrounded by dysfunctional internet troll dorks and people who cannot get their face turned away from their smartphone, asking for a telephone call back is a simple task. If you can't follow that simple direction, imagine the message you are sending to a potential employer (bandleader) when the $%!@ hits the fan. Thieves and drunks and crooks and people trying to start fights are a regular part of gigging; I want to know I'm surrounding myself with confident, reliable people. Be the rock solid musician you want to be, not the flake everyone perceives you to be!
 
My drummer friend and I found a guitarist on CL to jam with. Nice guy, but as mentioned earlier, a phone conversation can reveal a lot about a person.

Our jam room at my friends house is way back in the deep depths of his basement, so they guitarists nervously said on his way to the jam room..."I hope I don't find a single chair and plastic sheets on the floor of the room we're going to!"

Now that would be a funny April Fools Joke.
 
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Our jam room at my friends house is way back in the deep depths of his basement, so they guitarists nervously said on his to the jam room..."I hope I don't find a single chair and plastic sheets on the floor of the room we're going to!"

Now that would be a funny April Fools Joke.
Reminds me of our drummer's old 'Rock Dungeon' as we affectionately used to call the subterranean practice space in his previous home. It was always extra creepy when we were auditioning female singers ... "yes, please come to meet the other 3 guys in my band at our practice space in my soundproof basement. The house is a little hard to find, as you can't see it from the road, and phone reception kind of sux once you get up the long driveway. We usually meet when it starts to get dark." :wideyed:
 
Clearly an age thing.
I'm 50, quite comfortable with emails, texting, setting up rehearsals with strangers through Facebook and I honestly can't imagine taking a phone call being an issue, but I showed this to my 21-yr-old son and he got the OP's reaction immediately.
Sometimes it's sad, getting old...

It's not an age thing.

As the OP himself said, someone in their twenties shouldn't have any issues at all talking to someone on the phone.

Texts are great for quick/simple communication, but you can accomplish more in a five minute phone call than you can sending texts back and forth for 30 minutes.
 
It is very interesting though to see how many people on this thread, regardless of age, either "hate" or prefer to avoid telephone calls.

I wonder why that is.

Because some people like to talk your ear off on the phone? I'm 44, have no problems talking to people on the phone, but I'm not interested in having a long, drawn out conversation unless it's necessary. For something like this, I think a phone call is important, and should happen fairly early in the process, before the first physical meeting. But after that, if you call me, it had better be important and to the point. There are exceptions of course, but in the end I prefer a face-to-face meeting for long conversations or e-mail if that isn't possible.
 
I tend to prefer email or text, especially if it involves things like being told an address. I am 56 and by no means do I hate using the phone, but I have some deafness issues lately and especially on these newer and smaller phones I seem to have a very hard time being able to understand what the other person is saying sometimes.
Russ
 
I met my guitarist after suggesting that we meet for coffee in person. He introduced me to his friend, another guitarist, and we soon got a drummer. There's no wrong way to do it, as long as it results in a band forming.
 
I think you guys are viewing this the wrong way. I'm 25, and I didn't own a cell phone til I was 18 years old (yes I know that's weird). I communicates solely by telephone calls for the better part of my life, and I always hated it. I'm an introvert and I don't like talking on the phone with people that I don't know. I now mostly text, not because In"grew up in a different time", but because as an introvert choosing between the two methods, texting is far more comfortable.

I'm still very outgoing, personable, and articulate. You probably would never guess that I prefer to spend my free time in total solitude, but I do. The two places I am most happy are alone at home and on stage in front of tons of screaming strangers. But a 1-on-1 with strangers? Total discomfort.