Quitting / Firing via Text Message Acceptable Now?

[Artman]

I'd rather they do that than waste any more of my time loading up and driving to a rehearsal or gig first. That being said, I wouldn't do it myself. I would make an actual telephone call.

 

[PennyroyalWe]

Quitting, yes. That’s something I think should be communicated as soon as possible, that way the band can move on to finding a replacement. No time to waste trying to meet up for beers tomorrow.
Firing, I say do it face to face. Give them the opportunity to punch you in the face, or prove their more restrained than that.

 

[Zoffy]

Current band is going through some weird interpersonal dynamics. When we started , we were all working for the same company. at the same location and pretty much similar shifts. Now we all work for different organizations and different shifts. The guitar player (unilaterally) decides that we are not meeting enough now to justify the cost of a rehearsal space and decides he's not paying for the space anymore. We can't afford to comp his part of the rent so yesterday we cleaned out our space. I think this was a bad idea, but I'm just the bass player - what do I know?

In our case, because our schedules are so varied, we communicate mostly by text. I would not be surprised if the decision to part ways is done by text if it comes down to that...and it might.

 

[Killing Floor]

Drummer? Acceptable
Bassist? Unacceptable

 

[BtaylorTheRogue]

Unacceptable:

• doing it at the beginning or end of rehearsal
• calling a special meeting to do it if someone lives far away
• doing it one of the acceptable ways, but being unkind about it

Acceptable:

• doing it face to face in a way that doesn't change practice plans last-minute
• doing it via the regular communication method for serious topics, whatever that is. For my band, it's facebook messages. For my last band, it was text messages

I would rather know a few days earlier, instead of thinking about the work, loading a truck, driving to practice, starting to unload, having to reload, and driving home.

Methods of communication and their social implications change over time.

 

[AboutSweetSue]

Only a-holes and/or cowards think it would be acceptable to fire a good person through something other than the human voice.

Now, if the person getting fired is a complete a-hole…or a drummer…fire them any way you please, and do it quickly. Some people are not deserving of respect.

 

[Nev375]

So doing things "In bad taste" is acceptable??

I do not agree with this.

OK. Well, whaddaya gonna do about it?

Ultimately, one HAS to accept it. That's what people do now.

 

[Ggaa]

Well, if the band relationships were that impersonal in the first place, sure. Otherwise no.

 

[Altitude]

Never acceptable, and the fact that there’s a position being taken in this thread that it is seems disappointing.

 

[LBS-bass]

Never acceptable, and the fact that there’s a position being taken in this thread that it is seems disappointing.

It really just seems to show that it is becoming acceptable to some people, otherwise everyone would agree with you. That percentage is probably growing as we get more accustomed to texting in our society. But there will always be people who just want things the way they've always been.

I was talking with someone about this the other day. He was going off about how self-checkout steals jobs and he'll never use it. I reminded him that 40 years ago people were making those same complaints about the automated teller machines, but nowadays I don't see a single person refusing to use the ATM if they need cash. Whether we like it or not, change happens.

 

[Pings Bass]

If you're working with digital natives (born since the 80s) get used to it whether you think it's acceptable or not.

Even if you don't like it, you can't deny its efficiency. If one party gets hurt feelers, the other party can carry on without getting dragged in to some auxiliary drama.

 

[Plain Old Barry]

Is this acceptable now?

I think quitting is probabaly a little more acceptable than firing via text-message?

I had an employee quit an $80k/yr. job via text message.

This was after she was about to be caught lying about a traffic accident in a company vehicle.

 

[PennyroyalWe]

I also want to mention that it is ableist to regard people who prefer to quit/fire via text as “lesser”. We are all human and have different levels of ability. Some struggle with conditions and circumstances that make verbal communication unduly difficult, such as speech disorders, severe anxiety, language barriers, autism, etc. To say these people are wrong in doing what they need to in order to partake in life experiences, i.e. being in band, is small minded and discriminatory.

 

[glocke1]

I'm an old man.

I remember when Rush's Moving Pictures was their "new" record. I remember waiting to make phone calls in the evening becasue "the rates went down."

So... I've always assumed quitting the band, and/or firing members is something that should ALWAYS be done face-to-face: schedule a meeting for beers and drop the news, or drop the news at the beginning of a rehearsal.

But now that we all carry nano-super-computers on our pockets, etc... I've QUIT one band via SMS, and also had members give notice and quit via SMS.

Is this acceptable now?

I think quitting is probabaly a little more acceptable than firing via text-message?

Honestly, as busy as things are now for me with work, commuting to work, lessons, etc...If someone asked me to meet them to discuss me getting fired, I'd ask them why they wasted my time like this and didn't just text.

 

[Engle]

I'm an old man.

I remember when Rush's Moving Pictures was their "new" record. I remember waiting to make phone calls in the evening becasue "the rates went down."

So... I've always assumed quitting the band, and/or firing members is something that should ALWAYS be done face-to-face: schedule a meeting for beers and drop the news, or drop the news at the beginning of a rehearsal.

But now that we all carry nano-super-computers on our pockets, etc... I've QUIT one band via SMS, and also had members give notice and quit via SMS.

Is this acceptable now?

I think quitting is probabaly a little more acceptable than firing via text-message?

In my last cover band, the drummer quit by email. That really pissed off the guitarist and “burned the bridge”. A phone call would have been much better.

 

[LBS-bass]

In my last cover band, the drummer quit by email. That really pissed off the guitarist and “burned the bridge”. A phone call would have been much better.

Personally this says more to me about the guitarist than it does about the texter. People look for excuses to hold grudges. Someone who is offended because the way someone quit didn't rise to their level of self-importance is a bridge I'm probably ok with burning.

 

[MultiScaleMale]

I also want to mention that it is ableist to regard people who prefer to quit/fire via text as “lesser”. We are all human and have different levels of ability. Some struggle with conditions and circumstances that make verbal communication unduly difficult, such as speech disorders, severe anxiety, language barriers, autism, etc. To say these people are wrong in doing what they need to in order to partake in life experiences, i.e. being in band, is small minded and discriminatory.

I think that's a pretty small percentage and really not what people are saying. You're painting with a broad brush to end with a conclusion that simply isn't there.

 

[DWBass]

I guess I suck. I quit my last band by email.

 

[Engle]

Personally this says more to me about the guitarist than it does about the texter. People look for excuses to hold grudges.

You are correct. The guitarist is brilliant, but he’s “on the spectrum”, which includes not letting things go.

I learned the hard way years ago that holding onto hate just poisons you. It’s not worth it.

 

[Brich]

Firing by text is a punk move. I’m not saying it has to be in person, especially if the situation could lead to blows, but at least pick up the phone. I’d say the same thing with quitting. At least call someone to tell the band.

I don’t see the point in dragging the whole band to rehearsal though. I’ve been in bands where members had a 45 minute drive. I’d be pissed if I drive 45 minutes just for someone to quit.

this