Rude to not take drinks?

[JimmyM]

You keep pushing this concept that anyone involved at a show is agreeing to a set of made-up terms and conditions that exist on paper somewhere. When I enter a bar, I am not beholden to any code of drinker’s etiquette. I am there to entertain by playing the notes, not to obligate my priorities as a de facto alcohol salesman. You think I don’t know what I’m talking about? I have been gigging this way since 1999 without a problem.

Why are you even persisting with this drunk-talk bar philosophy nonsense in a thread about sobriety? I haven’t seen you concede that some people are simply able to exist within a reality that you have never experienced. Perhaps you should pause and ask yourself why this makes you so defensive.

I wish I could agree with you, being a non-drinker who isn't comfortable with the idea that I'm anything but an artiste , but actually you ARE a de-facto alcohol salesman when you play a bar. It's a known fact that bars will always book bands who have better nights at the registers sooner than bands who sound better.

Now where I firmly disagree with people about this role of being in a band is the idea that the band has to be drinking to sell drinks. If someone offers to buy me a drink (rarely happens nowadays), I will take it and pretend to drink it, then forget about it. Hey why not? The bar just made $7 and every bit helps. Hell, in our band none of us drink onstage (by choice), and we rarely even mention drinks, but attendance and sales on our gigs has set many records and rare are the times we don't get asked back, and it's usually because we know what kind of money they're taking in and we want more. But make no mistake...you might think you're showcasing your talents and entertaining, and you most definitely are, but to the bar personnel and the owner, you are a salesman.

 

[Rip Van Dan]

I don't drink alcohol. No exceptions, no matter what. Same with other drugs. Same with smoking. Same with chewing tobacco. Same with coffee. Same with soft drinks. Same with lima beans. It's my body......my choices. If someone gets offended because I choose to not ingest a certain something into my body even though they choose to ingest it into theirs, then let them be offended, shocked, appalled, speechless, butthurt, and dumbfounded!!! I don't care. Period.

Oh the humanity of it all! What are we gonna do with Sactobass! He's a nonconformist!!! We can understand no drugs. But no lima beans??? Really????? (yes, really!)

Sactobass, I don't think you're in much danger of having to refuse an offer of lima beans at one of your gigs.

 

[SactoBass]

Sactobass, I don't think your in much danger of having to refuse an offer of lima beans at one of your gigs.

LOL! Thank goodness for THAT!

 

[SactoBass]

Don't you think that the same people littering beer cans are the ones that litter... hamburger wrappers, coffee cups, and any other kind of stuff they just don't want?

It sickens me to go out into the wild... and as long as a place is reasonably accessible, there'll be litter all over the place, even if there are garbage containers near.

Yep. You can always tell where humans have been.

Aren't we wonderful mammals?

 

[4001]

View attachment 3045855

sad

 

[Ross W. Lovell]

I may have bribed the bar crew at some point such that when someone says "I wanna buy that guy a drink," they make me a setup (everything except the alcohol)-- but there may also have been times when politics indicated I should possibly overimbibe just a bit--

Doing things for "political" reasons smacks of intimidation and coercion.

Definitely rude on their part.

 

[Ross W. Lovell]

If someone offers, I usually ask for a Roy Rogers. I've found most people don't know what it is.

Roast beef sandwich? I'm there.

 

[Ross W. Lovell]

I wish I could agree with you, being a non-drinker who isn't comfortable with the idea that I'm anything but an artiste , but actually you ARE a de-facto alcohol salesman when you play a bar. It's a known fact that bars will always book bands who have better nights at the registers sooner than bands who sound better.

Now where I firmly disagree with people about this role of being in a band is the idea that the band has to be drinking to sell drinks. If someone offers to buy me a drink (rarely happens nowadays), I will take it and pretend to drink it, then forget about it. Hey why not? The bar just made $7 and every bit helps. Hell, in our band none of us drink onstage (by choice), and we rarely even mention drinks, but attendance and sales on our gigs has set many records and rare are the times we don't get asked back, and it's usually because we know what kind of money they're taking in and we want more. But make no mistake...you think you're showcasing your talents and entertaining, and you most definitely are, but to the bar personnel and the owner, you are a salesman.

I tell the bar to send me up something that looks close in diet, and put the difference in money in the tip jar.

It's not worth the bar staff arguing with them either.

Everybody's happy.

 

[PJMustangFreak]

As a non-drinker, I've also noticed that people get offended if you don't drink. Sometimes, they even ask for an explanation. It doesn't bother me or anything, but this definitely happens!
Never let it bother you. It's not rude to refuse a drink. If someone gets upset, so what? Who cares? None of this really matters. It's such a non-issue!

 

[Ross W. Lovell]

Amen to that. Everywhere you drive in America nowadays is littered in Bud Lite cans. Our society is saturated in cheap, corrosive swill.

Works well in Russia.

 

[Ross W. Lovell]

Obviously the OP bowed out of the thread.

With all of you suggesting the 'work out a deal with the bartender about receiving a "dummy" drink', what happens when said bartender screws up or is on break and you receive a "real" drink?

Wow, my sobriety down the drain because someone else suggested I not be rude. When did it become such a horrible thing not to drink? I can honestly say I'll take a sober jerk over a drunk jerk, nice drunk, happy drunk, violent drunk, or a stupid drunk any day.

I'd love to be in a band, but playing for drunks isn't my thing, being around them isn't my thing, smelling it isn't my thing. So I guess if I was in a band I wouldn't play bars for those reasons. Heaven forbid I wouldn't want to offend anyone by making physically healthy, psychological healthy, family friendly and overall me being a better person decisions.

If your sobriety is that fragile and delicate, you should not be in places that serve.

I've more than a few friends with their "chips", this isn't a problem, they no longer drink.

I wish you well but if your sobriety is that close to being in peril, I'm glad you've made the decision to keep out of those places. Whether or not this extends to other areas, I hope so. Too many places for an issue to occur,

Wish you well on your continued sobriety.

 

[Felken]

WELP, OP deleted his post. You know what that means!

Spoiler

 

[bassstrangler]

If your sobriety is that fragile and delicate, you should not be in places that serve.

I've more than a few friends with their "chips", this isn't a problem, they no longer drink.

I wish you well but if your sobriety is that close to being in peril, I'm glad you've made the decision to keep out of those places. Whether or not this extends to other areas, I hope so. Too many places for an issue to occur,

Wish you well on your continued sobriety.

Thanks for the kind words, but I think you jumped to way too many conclusions concerning my situation. Since I stopped drinking I honestly just hate being around people with a buzz on or being flat out drunk. My sobriety is not in peril, I just choose not to be around people who drink to the point where there faculties and mood and behavior is influenced by alcohol.

I've grown to know alcohol is not necessary in my life and I choose to not be around people who abuse or get there buzz on. I find it's annoying behavior as well just plain silliness.

My wife drinks and has alcohol in the house. As long as she is responsible I don't mind. If she occasionally gets to the point of it altering her behavior I excuse myself and find things to do other than keep her company with a buzz on.

I walked away from alcohol, never got treatment, never went to a meeting. I abused it like no other and one day decided it was me or the booze, I decided to save myself. I can be around alcohol, I can be around drunks, I choose not to as it just irritates the $?!@ out of me. So being in a packed bar with a hundred drunks just isn't what I want to be around.

So once again thanks for your kind words, but don't rush to conclusions before you know the whole story.

 

[ELG60]

I would say: "I'm sorry, but it's a condition of my parole for second degree murder that I don't drink in public."

 

[mcnach]

As a non-drinker, I've also noticed that IDIOT people get offended if you don't drink. Sometimes, they even ask for an explanation. It doesn't bother me or anything, but this definitely happens!
Never let it bother you. It's not rude to refuse a drink. If someone gets upset, so what? Who cares? None of this really matters. It's such a non-issue!

I changed that for you.

 

[superheavyfunk]

What's with people deleting their original posts? How are ppl supposed to have context for a thread?

If you post an opinion and then find that is not one that's shared by the TB masses, just own the fact that you might have been incorrect and be "man" enough to be okay with that. Sheesh

 

[Ross W. Lovell]

Thanks for the kind words, but I think you jumped to way too many conclusions concerning my situation. Since I stopped drinking I honestly just hate being around people with a buzz on or being flat out drunk. My sobriety is not in peril, I just choose not to be around people who drink to the point where there faculties and mood and behavior is influenced by alcohol.

I've grown to know alcohol is not necessary in my life and I choose to not be around people who abuse or get there buzz on. I find it's annoying behavior as well just plain silliness.

My wife drinks and has alcohol in the house. As long as she is responsible I don't mind. If she occasionally gets to the point of it altering her behavior I excuse myself and find things to do other than keep her company with a buzz on.

I walked away from alcohol, never got treatment, never went to a meeting. I abused it like no other and one day decided it was me or the booze, I decided to save myself. I can be around alcohol, I can be around drunks, I choose not to as it just irritates the $?!@ out of me. So being in a packed bar with a hundred drunks just isn't what I want to be around.

So once again thanks for your kind words, but don't rush to conclusions before you know the whole story.

Any conclusions I made, were based on what I've seen happen to others in the situation you described.

Your mileage may vary.

Sorry.

 

[JRA]

why is there a . and nothing else?

yeah: i wondered the same. (?)

 

[troy mcclure]

I do not drink often and only with other people's money. I will not drink in the last set ever. If someone offers me a drink, I thank them , take a pretend swing and place it on the floor near my amp. My singer who is a lush will normally drink it or may even put it in a to go cup for the ride home.

 

[gln1955]

why is there a . and nothing else?

yeah: i wondered the same. (?)

Not clear. The OP asked about what we thought about situations where folks at a gig buy you a drink you don't want. People gave various opinions. Nobody crapped on the OP, believe it or not. OP deletes post.