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Urinal Etiquette
- Thread starter lawrenbd
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One rule that hasn't been mentioned is that your gear must remain properly stowed until reaching your position at the urinal and must again be properly stowed before turning around and vacating that position.
WHY do some guys have to first turn around and THEN start packing up?! Even worse, why do some have to start unpacking their gear before they get into position so that, as you're vacating your position, you turn around and walk into someone who's already whipping it out!
WHY do some guys have to first turn around and THEN start packing up?! Even worse, why do some have to start unpacking their gear before they get into position so that, as you're vacating your position, you turn around and walk into someone who's already whipping it out!
Relax, fellas. It's not like anything secret or unique is happening in there. Or is it?
At work the other day, one of the sales guys was at a uninal when I walked in. Thought he was talking to me, which I disliked not because he was talking, but because he's a douche. Turns out he was talking to a client on his cell phone. Made sure I flushed the urinal next to him long and loud, then left.
At work the other day, one of the sales guys was at a uninal when I walked in. Thought he was talking to me, which I disliked not because he was talking, but because he's a douche. Turns out he was talking to a client on his cell phone. Made sure I flushed the urinal next to him long and loud, then left.
- Dec 28, 2009
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I was out in Dallas on vacation visiting a friend. We went out to dinner with his girlfriend and her brother. I went in to use the restroom and then the girlfriends brother came in. He whipped it out and pissed in the sink even though stalls were opened. Needless to say, I didn't wash my hands in that sink. Instead, I had to go to a business next door to wash up over there. He also didn't wash up either. It really grossed me out. I also just recently learned that man is now in prison. I bet he doesn't pull that same stuff with his cellie. Inmates have certain rules too and that would be a big time no no!
Next time someone takes the urinal next to you continue peeing, and then proceed to put your arm around his shoulder and start to whistle the Top Gun theme song. Then when done put your hands in his sink while he's washing up afterwards. For a little bonus you can smack his ass on the way out and call him 'slugger'. 'have a great day slugger.'. That should learn him real good.
reminds me of this...
"Kumar: [walks up to a bush and starts peeing] Ahh.
[Creepy Guy walks up out of nowhere and starts peeing right next to him]
Kumar: 'Scuse me, I just...
Creepy Guy: Huh?
Kumar: I have to ask you, why'd you... wha... wha... why are you peeing... right here?
Creepy Guy: What?
Kumar: I mean... why'd you pee right next to me when you could like, choose that bush, or...
Creepy Guy: Well, this bush looked like I should pee on it. Why are you peeing on it?
Kumar: Well, no one was here when I chose this bush.
Creepy Guy: Oh, so you get to pee on it and no one else does? Huh?
Kumar: No, it's just... I just...
Creepy Guy: This your bush? You have a special bond with this bush?
Kumar: No, I just thought that...
Creepy Guy: You the king of the forest?
Kumar: I'm sorry?
Creepy Guy: What?
Creepy Guy: You ****in' tree-hugger. IS THIS YOUR SPECIAL BUSH?
Kumar: Never mind. Forget it, I really don't feel like gettin' stabbed tonight.
[they pee in silence for a bit]
Creepy Guy: [quietly] Nice pubes.
Kumar: [pauses, creeped out] Thanks. "
There's an older gentleman at work who likes to strike up a conversation while at the urinal every time he sees me. I like the guy but man I hate when he does that. Don't know why other than I just want to take care of business and get out. I don't want to have a conversation with another dude while I'm holding my schmeckle.
BULL****!!!!!
I used to have to clean the womens restroom at Burger King. 9 times out of 10 it was more rank than the mens room. Ive heard stories. Ive seen Seinfeld.
Women's restroom filthiness > Men's restroom filthiness, 500 million fold!
Lies... For several years, I thought all of the women's restrooms had big red couches, vases with fresh cut flowers, non streak mirrors, and free issues of entertainment weekly... This came to a sudden and bitter halt when actually entering a chicks bathroom and finding it upsettingly more hazardous then a guys room.. and trust me... Ive seen horrid things in a guys room... all I will say is "poor plunger, you never stood a chance."
Half of me feels sorry for womenfolk who have to relieve themselves with a box full of bloody madness all of 5 inches away from their face...
The other half feels no sympathy, cuz y'all are friggin gross! Doodoo on the floor? Really???
The other half feels no sympathy, cuz y'all are friggin gross! Doodoo on the floor? Really???
Seriously, at work I have the job of cleaning toilets and the guy's ones are probably better than the women's.
I think guys rooms are actually somewhat more decent because we have an option to sit or stand. Once we commit to standing, its a urine only deal.. Girls.. they sit and do a nice number one, and they can still decide.. "hmmm, maybe I'll squeeze a small one out.. if it floats, I won't flush."
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