Am I wrong?

[buldog5151bass]

What's the best route...carry on with new players as ZZ Top, the Allman Brothers, Eagles, Little Feat, the Grateful Dead, and many others have done or let one loss stop the show, as Led Zeppelin did?

You missed my point. It's up to the band. There is no one right decision, as the prior poster stated. It depends on many factors as to how, when, and if.

 

[Michedelic]

How long did it take ZZ Top to replace a bassist who had been with them for over 4 decades? What about the Who?

What a band "should be" matters only to the members of that band.

What's the best route...carry on with new players as ZZ Top, the Allman Brothers, Eagles, Little Feat, the Grateful Dead, and many others have done or let one loss stop the show, as Led Zeppelin did?

You can’t really cite name acts as examples, because there’s big money involved.
Plenty of stories of certain aggregations where members won’t speak to each other beyond being onstage, putting up a front of unity and brother/sisterhood. For the bucks.

 

[Michedelic]

It's slightly amusing to me how many grown adults are still afflicted with "Monkees syndrome," that is to say an idealized image of what a band should be like that's based on things they saw manufactured on television that weren't actually real.

Yes, we all remember the old Beatles movies and the Monkees and the Partridge Family and all of that other feel-good stuff that made us believe, as youths, that a band was some sort of rarified family experience. Maybe we longed for that sense of belonging and it's part of what propelled us toward playing music and putting our first band together.

But life is not like TV and movies. Bands aren't marriages. They aren't even families, though sometimes they fight like families. They aren't all best friends, either. Even the Beatles decided to go their separate ways when they got sick of each other.

This circles right back to the thing about changing your expectations. If this sort of fictionalized experience is what you're expecting, you're always going to be disappointed.

If anything, and in spite of the satiric/farcical nature of the plot, Spinal Tap remains the best allegory of being in a band, at any level, as every “they’ll do it every time” cliche about the experience is gathered up. Even as dated as the film is now, plenty of the jokes still have legs or resonate.

 

[51PRI]

You can’t really cite name acts as examples, because there’s big money involved.
Plenty of stories of certain aggregations where members won’t speak to each other beyond being onstage, putting up a front of unity and brother/sisterhood. For the bucks.

Even so, I was only responding to another poster who brought up name acts.

 

[wintremute]

I’ve been called possessive, selfish, immature, inexperienced… All because I left a band that preferred to play without me rather than wait one more week. Ok. Keep it coming guys…

I’m friends with another band that will not take December bookings because the guitarist can’t play them. I guess I’m not the only one that has the concept of what a band should be.

I guess today’s bands are a bunch of plug in, replaceable players with no unity or loyalty to each other whatsoever. Ok. Lesson learned.

OP: Am I wrong?

A lot of TB members: Yes.

OP: No I'm not!


Though I do agree, some of the name calling and judging wasn't necessary to get the point across.

 

[51PRI]

The one time my SO started sniping at me during a rehearsal I told him afterwards that if any other bandmember disrespected me like that in a rehearsal they'd be fired on the spot, and that I'd absolutely fire him the next time it happened....

Just curious...are you the BL in all of the bands you are in or can any band member fire another band member unilaterally?

 

[LAST_C]

OP: Am I wrong?

A lot of TB members: Yes.

OP: No I'm not!


Though I do agree, some of the name calling and judging wasn't necessary to get the point across.

That was more of a rhetorical question. I know I’m not wrong.

 

[wintremute]

That was more of a rhetorical question. I know I’m not wrong.

After re-reading your first post a few times, it very much does not come across as rhetorical. You give a description of the events as you see them, and then ask your "am I wrong question" (which also happens to be the title of the thread).

When people start responding, and asking for more details, rather than say "it doesn't matter, this was a rhetorical question", you give details to try to support your reaction of being offended.

I think post #127 is a little late to start rewriting history.

However, I stick with what I said before. You and the band had different expectations and poor communication. It's probably for the best that you parted ways, and I wish you luck on landing in a new spot that better supports your views.