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Farting during a show

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#821
RicPlaya said:
Jive

Be careful man! I know you want to impress the new band..but you may spend half the set in the can. We both know you can't go check you shorts during one of those questionable farts to see if it was shart...your playing with fire my friend!
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Agreed. Anyone taking odds he totally fills the Looms or at least comes home with these?

Invalid Link Removed
 
#823
Barfly said:
Agreed. Anyone taking odds he totally fills the Looms or at least comes home with these?

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Sounds like hey may need a manpon:


1. manpon

Its like a napkin folded together so if cough or sneeze and a little run comes out it hits that manpon.

"I got mud butt son. I was scared if I farted I would $hat on myself. I had 40 hot wings last night so I had to manpon it up son." Christopher "Big Black" Boykin.


2. Manpon

cool,soothing,moist,absor bant towellet that is place carefully between arse cheeks after a hard night of drinking and four or more bathroom visits.

Used in a sentence...
That's my fourth dump this morning does anyone have a manpon handy.


3. Manpon
Like a tampon only used in a mans rectum to soak up liquidy poo, butt pee, buckshot, sharts, etc.
 
#830
I'm still alive. Just been too busy to make a report until today.

Sad to say, it was quite uneventful. I ate 4 boiled eggs, a stalk of brocolli, a bowl of chili, 6 microwave White Castles, a bowl of GoLean Crunch, and a few Pepsis. The result was that I got a bunch of gas, but no stench. So I was ripping them all gig, but alas no stink. I could feel my bowels inflate, and the backpressure develop, but I didn't get that warm feeling that lets me know the next one is gonna be a paint peeler. Really disappointing considering all the preparaton I went through.

I do wonder what could be wrong with my digestive system. I have a few weeks before my next gig with these guys, so I hope to have it figured out by then.
 
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#832
For me, the DEFCON4 stink comes from Burger King. If I eat a Whopper w/cheese, and onion rings... I can set my watch by the results. 45 minutes after the meal, the scent that escapes my BVD's is often described as a mix of rotten eggs, sour milk, and spoiled pork. I have been kicked out of practice for this WMD. It makes my own eyes water. What makes tham even better, is that they are usually SBD in nature. I become unstoppable. I thought about adding kimchi to the mix, but I'm afraid I might cause permanent damage to the ol' sphincter.
 
#833
jive1 said:
I'm still alive. Just been too busy to make a report until today.

Sad to say, it was quite uneventful. I ate 4 boiled eggs, a stalk of brocolli, a bowl of chili, 6 microwave White Castles, a bowl of GoLean Crunch, and a few Pepsis. The result was that I got a bunch of gas, but no stench. So I was ripping them all gig, but alas no stink. I could feel my bowels inflate, and the backpressure develop, but I didn't get that warm feeling that lets me know the next one is gonna be a paint peeler. Really disappointing considering all the preparaton I went through.

I do wonder what could be wrong with my digestive system. I have a few weeks before my next gig with these guys, so I hope to have it figured out by then.
Click to expand...

Wow, that's amazing if the 4 eggs didn't do it. Maybe you should go with 4 over easy, and not cook out the yolk so much. Maybe cut the chili and just go with the old canned
baked beans. A full can.
 
#834
Thor said:
Wow, that's amazing if the 4 eggs didn't do it. Maybe you should go with 4 over easy, and not cook out the yolk so much. Maybe cut the chili and just go with the old canned
baked beans. A full can.
Click to expand...

I think maybe I was just trying too hard. Maybe I need to take the Zen approach and just let the stench come naturally.
 
#835
jive1 said:
I'm still alive. Just been too busy to make a report until today.

Sad to say, it was quite uneventful. I ate 4 boiled eggs, a stalk of brocolli, a bowl of chili, 6 microwave White Castles, a bowl of GoLean Crunch, and a few Pepsis. The result was that I got a bunch of gas, but no stench. So I was ripping them all gig, but alas no stink. I could feel my bowels inflate, and the backpressure develop, but I didn't get that warm feeling that lets me know the next one is gonna be a paint peeler. Really disappointing considering all the preparaton I went through.

I do wonder what could be wrong with my digestive system. I have a few weeks before my next gig with these guys, so I hope to have it figured out by then.
Click to expand...


Maybe throw some curry chicken in for added flavor.

Another good firestarter is to eat somthing/someplace you've never tried before. Someplace spicy. Someplace with a LOT of onions. Onions always add a nice bouquet. Especially when raw.
 
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