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First love broke my heart

#104
Derp said:
Just after that awkward street situation, I went home and told the story to my dad, as I was afraid she could have told her parents about my "desires". He gave me that dad type of "stop being a *****" pat on the back thing, and told me: "I bet she does everything with guys, and then puts everything on the guy stating that he did it. Don't you ever mess with her, she will get you in some deep ****." After a couple of hours I went to our mutual friend, who is a great guy by the way. We had an open conversation on his doorstep, and he told me that she has done it with a plenty of guys before and that the guys had some serious problems. I'm so glad he told me. That saved my ***. I was so disappointed and sad though, cause I still liked her, while at the same time thinking "What a dirty ***** have I come across with?" I was totally fine the next day, though.
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This whole sequence of...I don't even....how to.....

I...I can't touch what your dad said. There's a whole lot that I want to say but...he's your father, I can't touch it. OK. I've been 14, and I've been 15. Please take this into consideration...if a peer says that a 14 year old girl has "done it with plenty of guys before" there's a very good chance that it isn't true. Please don't go too deeply into this budding misogynistic stuff you're on now. I'll stop there
 
#105
macaroni tony said:
Just so we're clear....you are aware that knocking on the door of a girl you met at a shindig for days on end without a response and then pedaling toward her with the full force of your 15-year-old horniness and calling her a ***** for responding negatively is completely the wrong course of action, correct?

Just so we're clear. I've been 15 too. Just about all of the most awkward, embarrassing and dumb things I've ever done were at that age. Your hormones will level out, you'll learn the difference between "love" and "woody," and you'll learn how to interact with the wimmenz without being weird and all stalkery about it
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WOODY hahahahahaha I'm on the floor. You people are as awesome as always.
 
#107
macaroni tony said:
This whole sequence of...I don't even....how to.....

I...I can't touch what your dad said. There's a whole lot that I want to say but...he's your father, I can't touch it. OK. I've been 14, and I've been 15. Please take this into consideration...if a peer says that a 14 year old girl has "done it with plenty of guys before" there's a very good chance that it isn't true. Please don't go too deeply into this budding misogynistic stuff you're on now. I'll stop there
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I'm not misogynistic anymore. That phase is over.
 
#109
Derp said:
I'm not misogynistic anymore. That phase is over.
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I was referring to

Derp said:
...After a couple of hours I went to our mutual friend, who is a great guy by the way. We had an open conversation on his doorstep, and he told me that she has done it with a plenty of guys before and that the guys had some serious problems. I'm so glad he told me. That saved my ***. I was so disappointed and sad though, cause I still liked her, while at the same time thinking "What a dirty ***** have I come across with?" I was totally fine the next day, though.
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automatically assuming the 14 year old girl is a skank because of what your friend told you (presumably because of what someone else told him, and because of what someone else told them and...you get the picture) is not in itself a case of misogyny, but is well on the road.

Basically I've seen plenty of (and have been a part of some of) girls whose reputation were ruined because one group of bros made an assumption, an exaggeration or a flat-out lie. And it's easy for this kind of thing to spread amongst a school full of dudes ready and willing to accept that a girl is one "of ill repute"
 
#111
macaroni tony said:
automatically assuming the 14 year old girl is a skank because of what your friend told you (presumably because of what someone else told him, and because of what someone else told them and...you get the picture) is not in itself a case of misogyny, but is well on the road.
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I thought he was calling her a B-word because she had made up lies about guys trying to come on to her:

"Suddenly she started hysterically shouting at me stating that "I am stalking on her and that I want to rape her".
 
#112
MatticusMania said:
I thought he was calling her a B-word because she had made up lies about guys trying to come on to her:

"Suddenly she started hysterically shouting at me stating that "I am stalking on her and that I want to rape her".
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I mean, she could have said it nicely to my face. Something like; "Derp, I know about your feelings, but sorry, I don't like you. Don't bother me anymore. Bye."
 
#114
MatticusMania said:
I thought he was calling her a B-word because she had made up lies about guys trying to come on to her:

"Suddenly she started hysterically shouting at me stating that "I am stalking on her and that I want to rape her".
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That's not the post that I was referring to, but I'll respond to this anyway....I didn't get the feeling from the story that she's making up lies. Judging from the actions taken it's not far fetched at all in my mind that she was freaked out at being stalked and rolled up on by a dude on a bicycle and indeed thought he just wanted to take it
 
#116
macaroni tony said:
Basically I've seen plenty of (and have been a part of some of) girls whose reputation were ruined because one group of bros made an assumption, an exaggeration or a flat-out lie. And it's easy for this kind of thing to spread amongst a school full of dudes ready and willing to accept that a girl is one "of ill repute"
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As the father of a 14yo girl, I have witnessed this exact thing happen with a couple of her friends. Most recently...Boy tried to make a move on Girl. Girl refused. Boy started telling all his friends that Girl did something very inappropriate for a 14yo. Thanks to the magic of the intarwebz, Girl got a bad rep in 2.17 seconds, and very ugly things were posted about her. This rumor was faster to spread and easier to believe than the fact that Boy was a lying dirtbag.


On a side note - No, Derp. You may not have my daughter's phone number, instagram, kik, or any other contact info. She already has a stalker. :scowl:

;)
 
#118
EricF said:
As the father of a 14yo girl, I have witnessed this exact thing happen with a couple of her friends. Most recently...Boy tried to make a move on Girl. Girl refused. Boy started telling all his friends that Girl did something very inappropriate for a 14yo. Thanks to the magic of the intarwebz, Girl got a bad rep in 2.17 seconds, and very ugly things were posted about her. This rumor was faster to spread and easier to believe than the fact that Boy was a lying dirtbag.
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I was an adolescent in the 90s. The go-to defamation line was "Yo I heard she got AIDS"

....I never used that one though. Too much respect for the ladies :D

EricF said:
And some never grow out of it.
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word
 
#119
macaroni tony said:
That's not the post that I was referring to, but I'll respond to this anyway....I didn't get the feeling from the story that she's making up lies. Judging from the actions taken it's not far fetched at all in my mind that she was freaked out at being stalked and rolled up on by a dude on a bicycle and indeed thought he just wanted to take it
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I think you may have gotten crossed up, which is why I posted what I did, as it was in reference to what you were talking about in your post:

We had an open conversation on his doorstep, and he told me that she has done it with a plenty of guys before and that the guys had some serious problems. I'm so glad he told me. That saved my ***. I was so disappointed and sad though, cause I still liked her, while at the same time thinking "What a dirty ***** have I come across with?" I was totally fine the next day, though.
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I think he was saying here that his friend told him this girl had accused other guys of "stalking her and trying to rape her" and that got those guys in trouble. Thats why his ass was saved, and he referred to her as a dirty b****.

What the OP did may have creeped the girl out, but I dont think he was quite stalking her, and certainly not trying to rape her.

"automatically assuming the 14 year old girl is a skank" Those are your words, not the OPs.
 

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