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Kill Joy

#22
aekisz said:
Yeah, I'm getting up there in years so life is even shorter for someone like me. I'm the oldest member of the group by about ten years. I just never expected to have such a burst of creativity at this late a stage (I've written about 300 songs over the last 4 years). Where was it when I was 22 and a position to do something with it?
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If you can write 300 songs in 4 years, sounds like you don't need him. Surround yourself with good natured musicians and enjoy the rest of the ride :thumbsup:
 
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#23
DJ Bebop said:
What do you want to do and what is it you want out of the band?

1) is the band some form of needed income?

If so, suck it up, like you would a job and just do it.

2) Is the band a musical outlet for your writing and he is Lennon to your McCartney?

Let him know how hard it is to keep working with him and his critical nature and how hard it might be to keep folks around to play with.

If none of this applies, dump him and start over.

You're welcome
:)
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Yeah, it's more like number 2. There is no way anyone would pay money to listen to us play (or not enough to make a difference). COVID gave me a chance to learn two things: 1) guitar, 2)Logic Pro. So now, I'm not actually not totally dependent on a band for a creative outlet. Those robot drummers in Logic can be made to sound pretty decent. And there are moments where I can sound like a mildly competent rhythm guitarist and even play some simple leads. So if the band goes, I'll still record.
 
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#24
aekisz said:
Yeah, it's more like number 2. There is no way anyone would pay money to listen to us play (or not enough to make a difference). COVID gave me a chance to learn two things: 1) guitar, 2)Logic Pro. So now, I'm not actually not totally dependent on a band for a creative outlet. Those robot drummers in Logic can be made to sound pretty decent. And there are moments where I can sound like a mildly competent rhythm guitarist and even play some simple leads. So if the band goes, I'll still record.
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Write an angry breakup song about him!
 
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#25
LBS-bass said:
Write an angry breakup song about him!
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191125_Taylor_Swift_at_the_2019_American_Music_Awards_(cropped).png
 
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#27
I relate to this. I have a guitarist #1 as well. I can’t imagine learning a set of original songs together. We argue about how our cover songs are played a lot. Many times it’s the guitarist playing his version of the song that he played with his last band, not understanding why no one else knows his old bands unrecorded version of the song.

I would give it time. Some days we do not get along and I think about hanging it up but the next practice all problems have worked themselves out. I do not have many band mate options in my area and when ever I think of giving up on my group I realize it’s better then playing alone. Good luck!
 
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#30
Medbo_BassBoy said:
I relate to this. I have a guitarist #1 as well. I can’t imagine learning a set of original songs together. We argue about how our cover songs are played a lot. Many times it’s the guitarist playing his version of the song that he played with his last band, not understanding why no one else knows his old bands unrecorded version of the song.

I would give it time. Some days we do not get along and I think about hanging it up but the next practice all problems have worked themselves out. I do not have many band mate options in my area and when ever I think of giving up on my group I realize it’s better then playing alone. Good luck!
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Yeah, I was just venting. This is the first time I've ever done so on a public forum. I really do feel like I owe you all a $35 co-pay for the counseling. Send me all your Venmos.
 
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#32
aekisz said:
That's the phrase that pops into my head for my current band situation. After not playing for a year (COVID) the remnants of my last band (me and a guitarist) found a drummer and another guitarist to get things going again. Guitarist #1, however, has a bad habit of being very fussy and impatient about other people's musical chops/choices. He is constantly ranting to me about the inadequacies of the others in the band (makes me wonder what he says about me in my absence), even though:

1) We are not a young bunch and have a very limited pool of musicians to choose from who are willing to do interesting (atypical) original music.
2) These other guys have only practiced with us a handful of times so far.
3) We are playing original music that the others have never heard and are in the process of altering certain arrangements on the fly.

To top it all, Guitarist #1 has just shared one of their long rants about the drummer accidentally with the drummer, heavily critiquing his musical acumen. So, it will be interesting to see if he shows up for tomorrow's practice.

Meanwhile he has commenced to critique Guitarist #2 the same way, but so far has not shared these feelings with the target.

I have flaws and limitations too, so I know for sure there is a rant about me posted somewhere.

Is it that hard to understand that it takes time to create and settle on parts to original songs? I mean, one should want to try lots of different things to see what works. That's the process of reaching the final product. Especially for a freaking bunch of amateurs.

In any case, it has hugely dampened my enthusiasm for creating music. I was going to share some new tunes with the band, but now I'm just going to record all the parts on my own and move on. Besides bass, I'm lead singer, lyricist and split the music writing with Guitarist #1 about 50/50. It's enough to make me long for the days of quarantine.
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Life is too short to hang with people who don't comport themselves as adults and lack emotional intelligence. #1 sounds like he's full of #2. ;)
 
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#34
Unfortunately the music world at all levels is full of insecure, manipulative and divisive people who have constant agendas no matter what they are involved in. In the last ten years I've left two bands I really liked because of people with these character defects... what always amazes me is how others can't see through shallow and manipulative characters when to me they are transparent. But in the end it's always best to move on to a different and hopefully better scenario. Just make sure you always have a supply of pins and playdough.
 
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#36
aekisz said:
That's the phrase that pops into my head for my current band situation. After not playing for a year (COVID) the remnants of my last band (me and a guitarist) found a drummer and another guitarist to get things going again. Guitarist #1, however, has a bad habit of being very fussy and impatient about other people's musical chops/choices. He is constantly ranting to me about the inadequacies of the others in the band (makes me wonder what he says about me in my absence), even though:

1) We are not a young bunch and have a very limited pool of musicians to choose from who are willing to do interesting (atypical) original music.
2) These other guys have only practiced with us a handful of times so far.
3) We are playing original music that the others have never heard and are in the process of altering certain arrangements on the fly.

To top it all, Guitarist #1 has just shared one of their long rants about the drummer accidentally with the drummer, heavily critiquing his musical acumen. So, it will be interesting to see if he shows up for tomorrow's practice.

Meanwhile he has commenced to critique Guitarist #2 the same way, but so far has not shared these feelings with the target.

I have flaws and limitations too, so I know for sure there is a rant about me posted somewhere.

Is it that hard to understand that it takes time to create and settle on parts to original songs? I mean, one should want to try lots of different things to see what works. That's the process of reaching the final product. Especially for a freaking bunch of amateurs.

In any case, it has hugely dampened my enthusiasm for creating music. I was going to share some new tunes with the band, but now I'm just going to record all the parts on my own and move on. Besides bass, I'm lead singer, lyricist and split the music writing with Guitarist #1 about 50/50. It's enough to make me long for the days of quarantine.
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Greetings,

How well does he play?

If average or better, tell him to keep his personal critiques to himself or the next time he's history!

If he's less than average, say goodbye NOW,
 
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#37
ficelles said:
Unfortunately the music world at all levels is full of insecure, manipulative and divisive people who have constant agendas no matter what they are involved in.
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1563fdcdd1a1be8d806575f2b7950c11.gif


Sound like a description of most humans in general.

:)

"The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There's also a negative side."
Hunter S. Thompson
 
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#39
aekisz said:
Musically he’s great to work with. Compatible aesthetics. Quick study. Unique and diverse guitar tones. Interesting and quirky phrasing. Solos that make sense and go some wild places but wrap up neatly. I mean, it’s worth putting up with some shenanigans but I’m feeling pushed.
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Great players are not always good bandmates.
 
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