The crux of the issue, imho, is that he made the comments to the media, and they were obviously premeditated, judging by how he was asking the cameras to be turned on. If he'd have said it ON THE ICE, it likely would have stayed on the ice, although he'd have been hammered by several of the Calgary players, particularly Phaneuf.
Once it comes off the ice and into the media, it crosses the line and goes too far. While his comment is still vile, it reminds me of how Reg Dunlop got into the goalie's head in Slap Shot (Paul Newman R.I.P.). It was no longer trash talking, but he was actively representing the NHL and the Stars organization with the comment that was disparaging to women. Had he said "ex-girlfriends" no big deal. Had it been an idle comment in the locker room with no media present, it'd be locker room ****-swinging. But by putting it in the media like he did, he went way too far. I'm just glad the Wings got rid of him in 2003 I believe. Ironically, when he was with the Wings, class acts like Yzerman, Lidstrom, and Shanahan kept him in line.