One racist remark?

[J Posega]

Sad that it had to end that way, but you made the right move. Distance yourself from them, and whenever anyone asks you about the band you were in before, just say, "Oh, well, I played with them for a while, but it turned out that so-and-so was a racist ass, so I took the moral high ground and excused myself from being surrounding by unintelligent jerks".

I have a hard time getting bands started because I'm not the typical, crude, misogynistic, beer-chugging college-going white male. Sorry, I can't tolerate people putting down those of a slightly different color, women, or the homeless. I won't surround myself with people like that. Why should I? Nobody should.

 

[TheCrimsonKing]

Racism is bad, I think that's the message here.

Fair enough, I'm cool with that.

 

[Jughead6]

Here in Australia, incitement of racial hatred is a criminal offence.

You did the honorable thing, even if you've been penalized for another persons crime. Sadly, I fear that your former bandmates will not learn from this experience.

 

[Hopkins]

Get over yourself. The "N-Word" has nothing to do with color, except to certain (generally poor and ill-educated) black men. They have taken it as their own, as a way to call everyone else "racist," and be offended so as to justify their own poor behavior. It isn't, it is simply descriptive of someone who is narrow-minded and arrogant without cause. Yes, this can describe many black men, but that doesn't mean it applies to all. I have many black friends and acquaintances, and also know several "N-Words," most of whom are not black. Yes, racism is real, yes it sucks. No, you shouldn't be offended by that word, IMHO. If you are one, then it applies to you, so you can't be offended. If you are not one, then it isn't true, so you can't possibly be offended.

That is the exact nonsense I hear from people who try to justify their use of the word. The word has ALWAYS been a racial derogative used by racist to describe black people. It means nothing else.

 

[strictlybass_ic]

You don't want to be that guy with a list of "NO" items on his application. Just sets a negative impression of yourself. Come in neutral and feel out the group. If someone starts treading close to the line make your opinions known. If they still cross the line then boogie.

 

[basschanges]

Good for you. Don't dismiss the power of words, they can have a profound effect on one's psyche and behavior. It's such a shame that people are sooo insecure they need to denigrate other people in this most fundamental way.

I wish this guy could take a trip to my borough to see Crown Heights, East New York, Brownsville...so on. He would be forced to confront the fact that the "N-----" are actually people, not racial punching bags used whenever your own pain needs sublimation. They have various and distinct cultures each offering many things of beauty to the world.

 

[FunkHead]

I was well paid and appreciated, though the gig was a bit on the dull side. "The person" had shown hostility before, but all in a "joking" tone. He had never used such explicit language before, but it was becoming clear from his remarks about various music styles and pop artists that he had a problem with people of color, especially women. He also was always late, never prepared, his gear malfunctioned a lot, yet he was never criticized by the band leader. The BL and "the person" are old friends. The BL considers "the person" a star.

The bottom line is that I am not willing to tolerate hate speech. This was not a "teachable moment." The racist remarks came from an adult over 50 years old. One hears this kind of talk frequently in my region, and I can't turn the other cheek. If it happens again in a band I am in, I will walk. I take it personally.

I am still curious as to what about you sparks his Racist attitude.

 

[Jim Carr]

...I have a hard time getting bands started because I'm not the typical, crude, misogynistic, beer-chugging college-going white male. Sorry, I can't tolerate people putting down those of a slightly different color, women, or the homeless. I won't surround myself with people like that. Why should I? Nobody should.

Don't despair. I have just found a Brazilian Jazz trio and an old school 8 member Gospel/R&B group. I am the only "white guy" in either band. My reggae band is integrated. I think you will find there are a lot of great players who are not intolerant, but you will need to seek players from styles that don't attract haters—sorry to say that, but that's the way it is here in Texas.

 

[petrus61]

Good for you, OP. Life is too short to be surrounded by intollerant bigots. They're certianly more part of the problem than they are the solution to what's wrong with this world.

*Also, being a conservative does not equal being a bigot. Racists come in all shapes and sizes. Some are just better at hiding it than your average uninformed voter.

 

[groovaholic]

I think the OP's question boils down to: "Did I overreact?"

Clearly not, since no moderate reaction would be adequate -- anything less than what he did would tacitly condone the behavior.

Everything we can do to help racists understand that THEY are the minority now is a step in the right direction.

 

[pacojas]

right-on, Dr. Jim!
whenever i encounter people like that in a band/group setting, it usually means that person isn't intelligent enough for me to associate with!

 

[BurningSkies]

Sad that it had to end that way, but you made the right move. Distance yourself from them, and whenever anyone asks you about the band you were in before, just say, "Oh, well, I played with them for a while, but it turned out that so-and-so was a racist ass, so I took the moral high ground and excused myself from being surrounding by unintelligent jerks".

I have a hard time getting bands started because I'm not the typical, crude, misogynistic, beer-chugging college-going white male. Sorry, I can't tolerate people putting down those of a slightly different color, women, or the homeless. I won't surround myself with people like that. Why should I? Nobody should.

There are plenty of people 'in the scene' here who aren't any of those things. It may take some time to figure out who you fit with, but they are out there. Recently (you may be aware) a certain band went on the record about this city's music scene saying a lot of stuff about it being all those bad things. And yes every place has some of that. But there's plenty of 'scene' that ISN'T like that. The band in question particularly called out the locals as misogynist...which is funny given I play in a female fronted band and have played in them since the late 90's. I particularly wish there were more women playing and not just singing, but I think that's a cultural thing.

My take on what was said in Jim's situation is that if you call our president that, or anyone for that matter, you're calling a bunch of my close friends that, or ex-girlfriends, or colleagues, etc...

 

[Biggbass]

OP: Good for you! You have personal integrity and should be proud of it.
And the fact that he "knew you would be offended" only confirms his racism.
I don't think you need to explain anything more to the guy or the band...they already know.
Just distance yourself and keep moving forward.
IMHO if you tolerate it at any level then you are condoning it.
Your decision is commendable.

 

[Gully Foyle]

Both words would work just as well, as they have very similar definitions. I use the word pander in the case of the more extreme ends of the news spectrum because it seems they often take a rather extreme and hardline stance just to please their target demographic. MSNBC is equal and opposite to FOX.

I don't watch either, but this has been shown time and again to be untrue.

I'm frankly shocked that there is so much racist apologia in this forum.

And while of course racists are on both sides of the aisle, the well documented strategy of the gop, from the 60s on, was to capture the racist vote, which they did.

 

[Hopkins]

I don't watch either, but this has been shown time and again to be untrue.

I'm frankly shocked that there is so much racist apologia in this forum.

And while of course racists are on both sides of the aisle, the well documented strategy of the gop, from the 60s on, was to capture the racist vote, which they did.

How is it not true? both news stations take a rather extreme hard line stance to their side of the spectrum.

I don't watch either of them either, but I have seen enough of both of them to know that their reputations are well earned.

 

[Kukulkan61]

I would of blown it off and kept playing and getting paid.This world is cruel and rude and no matter where your at someone is gonna say something you don't like that's just the way it is,if I was to quit every job I had because some A** hole said something that offended me I would be broke and unemployed..it's sad but true but that's just the way it is...

 

[Gully Foyle]

Well, I agree FOX does take a very conservative approach, even radical revolutionary right wing approach.

MSNBC does take a liberal approach, but not a radical communist one, and in fact not even social democrat.

The wierd thing is that the US is very skewed. The 'left' party here would be a rightwing party in any other country in the world.

 

[Roland GR 88]

I would never quit a band because of something like that. In my opinion you overreacted. I guess (some of) you Americans are more nervous about this.

Nice to see you value rock & roll more than people.

No offense, but I feel like you went about this all wrong. It's a silly little word. It's a series of letters arranged in a specific order.

So was Mein Kampf . (sorry about the arrangement of letters in that last word, maybe GOOF is more appropriate)

 

[Jim Carr]

I am still curious as to what about you sparks his Racist attitude.

Good question.

I often was the only one who heard the mistakes he or others made, and at times it was my role to say, "No. That's wrong." He liked to sing harmony and often stepped on my parts, which I also objected to. I think that he was threatened by the fact that I am musically educated (retired music professor), have a great ear, and I'm as good or better at what I do as he is.

He wanted to be "the star," but he wasn't. I came prepared and early. I can hear most everything and tell immediately what is wrong or right. I don't like to waste time like he did "telling tall tales" while rehearsing, and I said so. He seemed insecure, and made a lot of fart jokes. None of that is a crime, really.

However, his choice of remarks shows that resented me as an educated liberal person and felt comfortable with using hate speech to intimidate me because the environment signaled it was OK. How is that my fault?

Sorry, I guess am not very interested in being a psychoanalyst for my racist x-colleagues. They can just go to H. E. double toothpicks.

 

[Hopkins]

Well, I agree FOX does take a very conservative approach, even radical revolutionary right wing approach.

MSNBC does take a liberal approach, but not a radical communist one, and in fact not even social democrat.

The wierd thing is that the US is very skewed. The 'left' party here would be a rightwing party in any other country in the world.

I am not arguing that, the political spectrum has taken a rather drastic shift to the right. But as far as American political views go, MSNBC is pretty far to the left. They are not extreme progressives because there are no extreme progressives left in America.