Wow.....I leave for a few hours to band practice, and this thread goes crazy......
BrokenAngel....OK, I am wrong, you are right. It is important for me to understand that what you THINK is right, and my feelings/opinions/thoughts are ignorant. Yes, you are always right, and until people like me understand that and start viewing the world through your eyes, our lives will eternally suck.
"C'mon, is there any evidence that you'd actually accept?"
Yes, there is. If I am wrong, then I want to know. I don't want a mountain of personal stories from gay people who say they were born gay. People can say what they want, doesn't make it true. A gay person may genuinely feel they were born gay. I genuinely feel lot's things. I am not going to pronounce them as fact unless I can prove it.
"Hey, I'm calling it like I'm reading it. Is this or is this not a judgement"
OK Brad...I realize that I am making a judgement. It is NOT a judgement of what is right, and wrong. I am not passing judgement on a gay man by choosing to associate with a straight man instead. It is ME judging something for myself. I am allowed to make that choice without having people tell me I am a bigot. I do not look at a gay person and say to myself that they are wrong, and I refuse their friendship. I look at a gay person and think that their lifestyle is one very different from mine. As I have said from the start, there is a better CHANCE that I will have a more successful relationship with a straight person. A CHANCE. I made it clear that I would not rule out friendship with anyone based on social group.
"snap judgements like these IMO keep the world from being a better place."
Be real Brad. You walk into a bar/room/store, and you just do not have the time to befriend EVERY single person to see who would make a good friend. We immediately gravitate to people who we feel are similar to us. Everyone does it....everyone. You are full of crap if you say you don't do it. OK Brad...you walk into a crowded bar and see a guy wearing a t-shirt of your favorite band. Are you telling me you would not immediately feel that he would be a good person to possibly hang out with? There is a chance he beats seals, and you would maybe not like him after all.
I suppose we can sit here and nitpick each other all day, take my illustration of parents with, or without kids, and throw in all kinds of variables to make me appear to be a complete jacka$$. But that is not the point here Brad. You have now resorted to nitpicking every word of my sentences to make me look foolish. I was hoping you would understand what I was getting at in the big picture, I guess not. If I saw you on the street holding a bass just like mine, my ignorant, close minded self would foolishly assume you and I would have more in common than the guy standing next to you holding a trombone.
"See, I just learned something. I had no idea that only straight people go to bars to find dates."
Did you really miss the point of my idea there, or are you just being confrontational? Let me explain t-h-o-r-o-u-g-h-l-y. I, a straight man, walk into a bar to find a date with a straight woman. A gay man is NOT in a bar to find a date with a straight woman. If that is my sole purpose for being in the bar, I am not going to have much in common with that gay man on this particular evening. Maybe I come back the next day to watch a football game, and the same gay guy is there watching the game too. In this particualr instance we will have plenty in common and most likely have a good time watching the game. Provided we both like the same team.
"I guess we're just more outgoing and interested in diversity."
Yeah, I guess that is it. My family is just some close minded bigots. Shame on us for assuming other married couples with children would make good people to recreate with. My local YMCA schedules times for families to gather and play. I foolishly assumed this would be a good idea. Much more outgoing of me to just be open minded and ask everyone I see instead. BTW, I never said we only associate with people with kids. I was trying to make a simple point.
"Why on Earth would you automatically think you'd have more in common with either man?"
Yeah, as a bass player I foolishly assumed I would have more in common with the people at TalkBass than I would with the people at TalkDrums. All of us here are narrow minded bigots.
-Mike
), or i can judge that you are a bassist, and that would be a judgement, right? So a "judgement" in this broad sense that you're using isn't necessarily a bad thing; it's just a statement of observation or fact.
