Annoying things that tipsy people do at gigs...

[fourstr00]

Drinks on PA speakers/amps. Dude, it’s not a coaster.

 

[IamGroot]

Back 1976, EJ's Hideaway in Harding Minnesota, first night, gig over, I am leaning way over the bar to get a better look at something and new fan grabs a cheek, and she says something about bringing a bunch of people to see us on Saturday.

Which cheek?

 

[IamGroot]

I come from the old school where the old time performers knew their comedy schtick. If there was a drunk with potential entertainment value, they would invite them up on the stage, interview them, sing a song together while humiliating the crap out of him or her. And then point em in the direction in the bar and let em gratefully go back to the crowd.

A win-win for everybody. In bars, you provide entertainment and sell booze. If you want to perform, go get a tux and learn opera.

You folks are just too darn nice.

 

[interp]

For two and a half years I played five nights a week at a roadhouse in California that had the roughest looking clientele I had ever seen. In that time, there was only one fight inside the bar, and it happened on the sole occasion when the six or seven Hell’s Angels regulars happened to not be there. Who knew?

 

[bassdude51]

They may or may not be tipsy but annoying.............cell phoning during a show. Sticking phones up in the air for photos or a video cut. A very loud conversation going on while the band is playing. Hearing beer bottles being smashed in the the trash cans during performance. Fist fights. Having a glass of beer spilled unto me or my wife during a show.

Ahhh, ain't the club scene the best?

 

[EricMordus]

There have been MANY "entertaining" drunk people at gigs over the years. Hey, WE need to be entertained as well. It's almost a game:"Spot The Lush"....

One night at an open jam I play house bass at we had this perpetually drunk woman start sucking face with this guy we refer to as a lech, who was also drunk, sucking face while sharing 1 bar stool.They BOTH fell off the bar stool in mid slobber in slow motion, hitting the floor seconds after a song finished with a resounding "thud". That was maybe 2 years a go & we all STILL talk about it behind his back. well.... to him as well. I laughed so hard I thought I was going to throw up.

That being said, as a band member you are expected to mingle with the crowd during breaks to keep them drinking & sticking around. You are 100% going to come across either "Clingy Annoying Drunk Girl" or "Extraordinarily Abrasive Drunk Guy" every now & then, just roll with it with a smile and a wink

 

[Slevage]

Continue to drink.

 

[Slevage]

played an outdoor halloween party friday. We were up on 2 tow trucks parked next to each other. While we were setting up, some girl told us that she sang "what's up?" with us at another show a few years ago, and for whatever reason, when we did it, our singer invited her up. She was terrible enough, but some other girl showed up out of nowhere (I guess she climbed the ladder next to me?) and jumped on my mic and started singing. She was horrible. I turned my in-ears off for that song. It was the last song of the set, and on set 2, I pulled the ladder up behind me.

That’s what Alfalfa, Buckwheat, and Spanky would do at their tree house.
Then the meeting of the He Man Womenhaters Club would commence.

 

[JeezyMcNuggles]

When people, that I dont know or remember at all, start telling me they know me and who I am and start acting like were best friends. I really just want to tell them dude I dont know you, and walk away, but I really hate hurting people's feelings for something as harmless as talking to me. But that's really the only one that gets me. Well...that and puking near me. I hate puke. I get chain reaction puke once I smell it.

 

[Turbo Sparky]

"I love you man."
"Oh, okay, thanks."
"No, I do man, I love you..."
"Uh, well thanks dude..."
*Bear hug*
"Whoa DUDE! Easy man..."
"Yeah man, I love you..."
-OR-
"You sounded great man..."
"Thanks bro."
"What are you using for cabs and amps?"
*Prominently displayed on cab AND amp*
"Those man..."
"Yeah, but what brands?!"
*Blink blink*
-OR-
"Yeah man, you sounded good, but when I used to play I used {nomenclature/alphanumerics/serial numbers etc. from hell}..."
"Oh cool man."
"Yeah, you could use {repeat infinite nomenclatures from hell}... and sound even better."
-OR-
"Can I play your bass?"
*Blink blink*

 

[TeamScorpioRI]

- Anyone yelling out "Freebird" (I have it pre-loaded on our sampler.. and I will play it.. all 7 minutes)
- The Drunk who cannot stand and comes crashing down on my equipment.
- The groupie who gets on stage and grabs the mic away from me while I'm trying to sing.

 

[Siggy]

Drunk stumbles onto stage and knocks over equipment. AND there is always THIS!

 

[RichardW]

1. Someone grabbing the tambourine and "keeping time" (not) with the band.
2. Anyone making out on the dance floor (or at the bar). It's funny for about 10 seconds and then just gets gross and uncomfortable.
3. This: "Can you play (artist?)" "Sorry, we don't play any of their music." "What?! Oh c'mon, just play (artist). How about (song by artist)?" "Like I said, we don't have that prepared for tonight, but maybe next time." "You suck."

 

[redwingxix]

Ha. "What do you mean you won't play Kid Rock?"

Sorry, Maam. We have an active cease and desist order from Mr. Rock's attorneys prohibiting us from doing so. We will incur a $500 fine for each one of his songs we play. However, if you are willing to cover that fee...

 

[rtslinger]

I hate when drunks suddenly think they are good enough to join you on stage to sing or ask to play a song with the band because they used to play drums 20 years ago (happen recently) I can not tell you how many times I have been approached by people who claim their friend plays bass maybe he can do a song or two.

 

[bound'n'blocked]

After my transplant last year, I was stuck in the house for a while. I could leave, but I had to be careful for a few months. My first gig back, I was in this place where we were pretty popular. One of the regulars came up to me, hammered drunk, at noon, and said "heeeeyyy, good t thee you back!" and proceeded to hug me. His hygiene isnt the best, and I cringed. After he walked away, I got the hand sanitizer I carry around with me and squirted out about half the bottle, and rubbed it over my entire body. I hate unsolicited hugs.

BnB

 

[bound'n'blocked]

I hate when drunks suddenly think they are good enough to join you on stage to sing or ask to play a song with the band because they used to play drums 20 years ago (happen recently) I can not tell you how many times I have been approached by people who claim their friend plays bass maybe he can do a song or two.

I cant stand that. Last gig, a guy came up who looked like Dennis Hopper in Apocalypse Now. He talked about how he had written about 2500 songs in his life and was world renowned. Wanted to know what set he could come up and do a song or three with us. I said you cant. The club doesnt allow it. He said BS. He knows the owners personally, and that they always let him get up with any band playing there. I said I had played that place about thirty times in the 5 or so years it had been open, and had never seen him in there, and even if I had, I still didnt know him, so he wasnt getting on stage. He cussed me. I had him thrown out.

I dont let sober guys i dont know get up on stage with my band, let alone drunk ones.

BnB

 

[elgranluis]

There was this drunk guy with a very raspy voice who grabbed the mic and started singing to impress his wife.

Wait ... that was me last week , sorry. I had cold too.

 

[deste]

This past Friday I was getting hugs around the shoulders by a big drunk dude after our last set. He was a nice guy, really dug the band and was having a great time, but it was a bit much for me. And, he drank a ton of rum & cokes, so every time he spoke I had to keep from wincing from his rum breath. Same night, had a drunk girl chatting me up outside before the first set, when she found out I was one of the musicians she got a little too interested and followed me around for a few minutes........until I found the table my wife was sitting at. Drunk girl quickly changed course and I didn't see her again LOL

Old truth: never invite your spouse to your gigs... ;-)

 

[Wesley R]

Which cheek?

Lower Right if memory serves. The next night she brought five or six women and her boyfriend.