It's hard to have disdain for the PA if you have to sing through it.

It's usually better to get it to sound as good as possible.
Problem is, if I play with the same band three weekends in a row around here, there might be three different lineups. There might be 3 different PAs too, and none of them supplied by the venue. They tend to be small and light, because people drive a long way to gigs out here. There's rarely such a thing as the concept of a "band PA". That's just how the scene is. So I deal with that. I don't complain about the PA. I do what I can to make the whole band sound as good as possible. That includes fitting the bass into the mix, not on top of it. I thought that was what the OP was trying to get at. I'm sure it's a lot easier and nicer in metro areas, but this is not one of those.
If you understand the loudness curve, then you understand why bass uses "big amps", even if by big you mean 250w and a 15".