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Dating..whats up with men?

#81
Lowner said:
I am 31 year old woman. I am over weight but I do work out and have lost a lot of weight recently. But I am still overweight by most guys standards, I guess. I have met several men who have just flat out told me I am too fat for them to date me. I am a sweet lady, kind, caring, thoughtful, love sports and think I would make a good wife or girlfriend. yet men as soon as they find out I am overweight run far ,far away from me.
i just dont know why men are so preoccupied with looks. but i am no means an ugly lady. i am beautiful ,dang it! its just that I dont understand men who tell me looks are not inportant to them then they tell me I am too fat!
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How is "as soon as they find out" work? BTW... how overweight are we talking here?

It depends on the guy, I don't mind some extra weight. I focus more on breast size and ass mass. JK Now, personality goes a long way. I didn't adopt that attitude until I was older. In my 20's... it was no fat chicks. If you ever come down south (Alabama), PM me, I'll take you out and we will have a blast!!!
 
#84
Pacman said:
Like it or not, physical beauty is a factor in human relationships. If someone isn't attracted, they aren't attracted. It's less of a factor as the relationship progresses and a foundation is built, but it's very important in the early stages. I don't think you can demonize men for being honest with you.
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that and we're stupid.

i must admit that looks are important in the initial attraction stage.
 
#86
In EVERY single culture the world over, when shown drawings of just dark silhouettes of body shapes... they ALL pick the same types as "desireable".
It appears to be deeply genetically ingrained.

Men choose slightly curvy women with narrow waists and a little swell at the breasts and hips.

and women pick 'v-shaped', broad shouldered, narrow waisted men.
TALL also is desireable, the world over.


So that's what's "up" with men.
It's a genetic predisposition to mate with the most desireable child rearing shape.

As defined by nature over probably 50,000 years. (unless you're a creationist in which case, it happened in the last few months... enjoy your myths...)


But, if you are going to complain about men not seeing beyond your weight... can you HONESTLY say you've never dismissed a guy as too fat, too bald, too short.. whatever?
 
#88
I am a bit overweight. I went for years thinking I'd never meet anyone. I barely dated for 10 years. I just bought and sold basses, gigged and went about my life.

The a couple years ago I met and started to hang out with my now wife. Friends first, then more. I think the trick is I wasn't actively looking. It just happened. I was 38 at the time. My wife was 24.

Two years later we have a house and a 7 month old daughter and I wouldn't change a thing.
 
#89
Quote:
Originally Posted by wwittman
As defined by nature over probably 50,000 years. (unless you're a creationist in which case, it happened in the last few months... enjoy your myths...)


Don't turn this into knocking creationists please. And if you want to call me stupid for being one, PM me so we don't highjack the thread.
I'm only really turned off by a woman when her belly stick out further than her breasts, when her face looks like it was drawn onto a beachball and/or when it looks like she attached bags of cottage cheese to her arms and legs. Other than that, I don't mind a little extra weight at all. I'd mind more if was because she didn't take care of herself.
My wife is a little heavier, not fat, but has some extra weight and I think she's hot.
 
#94
SteveC said:
I am a bit overweight. I went for years thinking I'd never meet anyone. I barely dated for 10 years. I just bought and sold basses, gigged and went about my life.

The a couple years ago I met and started to hang out with my now wife. Friends first, then more. I think the trick is I wasn't actively looking. It just happened. I was 38 at the time. My wife was 24.

Two years later we have a house and a 7 month old daughter and I wouldn't change a thing.
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No, seriously dude, the "don't look for love" or whatever doesn't work. Guess what happens? You don't find anything. Just like you didn't date well for 10 years, I've had similar experiences (obviously I'm younger, though). Not doing anything doesn't help.
 

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