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Dumb Craig's List Ads pt.4: Dumber and Dumbest
- Thread starter Thor
- Start date
- Status
All that's missing is "We gave her everything she could have ever wanted, and we have no idea how she ended up this way!"
"You're not a fan of the band unless you know the bass player's name"
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I misquoted.... he used "Your" must have been the guitarist.
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
I misquoted.... he used "Your" must have been the guitarist.
If I had Weezy's pockets and I saw a kid in a music store playing a cheap bass standing on his/her head, I would buy it for them on the spot also.
If you want to shred, this is the guitar for you!
June 6, 2012
Forget the Jim Root Sig Strat. SHUT YOUR MOUTH AND LISTEN, PEACHFUZZ. This is Fender's Showmaster Celtic H. One of the last Superstrats.
MOTHER OF GOD. A 24-fret, set neck stratocaster?? No way! Get out of town!
Yah way! This is for real! A shredders dream!
THIS GUITAR CAN MAKE YOUR FINGERS MOVE FASTER THAN THE MILLENIUM FALCON.
Basswood body with hand-carved archtop. Really cool Celtic style inlays on 11th, 12th, and 13th frets. Rosewood fingerboard. EDDIE VAN HALEN LOOKED AT THIS GUITAR ONCE.
The stock pickup was kinda weak. So, I dropped a DiMarzio D Activator ($75 new) high-output humbucker and a new 500k volume pot in it to really open up the harmonics. Now, she really screams. WOMEN'S UNDERGARMENTS WILL LITERALLY DISENTEGRATE AT THE MERE SIGHT OF THIS INSTRUMENT. Sounds great for anything coming through a high gain amp, but also cleans up really well with great dynamics. By the way I still have the original PU too. If you want, I can put the stock one back in it if it will make the sale happen.
WARNING: THE NUMBER OF FEMALE BODIES CRAWLING ALL OVER YOU WITH THIS GUITAR IN HAND WILL BE THE ENVY OF ALL THE OTHER DOODS IN THE ROOM WHICH MAY CAUSE THEM TO WANT TO FIGHT YOU.
You really have to feel, play, and hear this guitar. I know you want to, and I really want you to also!
I'm selling the guitar with a practically-new (Just look at the pictures!) Roadrunner molded case (To get a case this clean, you'd have to buy it at Guitar Center and spend $120) plus a strap with locks (pictured). There are well over $200 worth of parts, add-ons, and accessories to go along with this guitar. So, I think $350 is a more-than-fair price. I'd prefer to have cash just because I've got doctor bills to pay (BACK INJURIES DUE TO THE INCREDIBLY HIGH NUMBER OF LADIES JUMPING ON ME BECAUSE THEY CANNOT RESIST THE MOJO THIS GUITAR PUTS OFF).
I'd even consider taking less without the case. Show me what you've got. Let's deal!
405-210-2***
DISCLAIMER: ALL INFORMATION DISCLOSED IN ALL CAPS MAY OR MAY NOT BE TRUE, BUT CANNOT BE VERIFIED WITHOUT ANY EXTENSIVE EVIDENCE. THE ABILITY TO INCINERATE THE OPPOSITE GENDER'S UNDERGARMENTS MAY CHANGE BY REGION, AGE, SEASON, AND OVERALL KICKASS-NESS OF THE PROSPECTIVE BUYER. SELLER IS NOT RESPONIBLE FOR ANY VENERIAL DISEASES ACQUIRED FROM SAID MOJO-STRUCK FEMALES. PLEASE EXCERSIZE EXTREME CAUTION WHEN USING THIS GUITAR AS IT MAY CAUSE UNPLANNED PREGNANCIES WITHOUT INTERCOURSE. ALSO, UNICORNS AREN'T ACTUALLY REAL.
Location: M*****
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
June 6, 2012
Forget the Jim Root Sig Strat. SHUT YOUR MOUTH AND LISTEN, PEACHFUZZ. This is Fender's Showmaster Celtic H. One of the last Superstrats.
MOTHER OF GOD. A 24-fret, set neck stratocaster?? No way! Get out of town!
Yah way! This is for real! A shredders dream!
THIS GUITAR CAN MAKE YOUR FINGERS MOVE FASTER THAN THE MILLENIUM FALCON.
Basswood body with hand-carved archtop. Really cool Celtic style inlays on 11th, 12th, and 13th frets. Rosewood fingerboard. EDDIE VAN HALEN LOOKED AT THIS GUITAR ONCE.
The stock pickup was kinda weak. So, I dropped a DiMarzio D Activator ($75 new) high-output humbucker and a new 500k volume pot in it to really open up the harmonics. Now, she really screams. WOMEN'S UNDERGARMENTS WILL LITERALLY DISENTEGRATE AT THE MERE SIGHT OF THIS INSTRUMENT. Sounds great for anything coming through a high gain amp, but also cleans up really well with great dynamics. By the way I still have the original PU too. If you want, I can put the stock one back in it if it will make the sale happen.
WARNING: THE NUMBER OF FEMALE BODIES CRAWLING ALL OVER YOU WITH THIS GUITAR IN HAND WILL BE THE ENVY OF ALL THE OTHER DOODS IN THE ROOM WHICH MAY CAUSE THEM TO WANT TO FIGHT YOU.
You really have to feel, play, and hear this guitar. I know you want to, and I really want you to also!
I'm selling the guitar with a practically-new (Just look at the pictures!) Roadrunner molded case (To get a case this clean, you'd have to buy it at Guitar Center and spend $120) plus a strap with locks (pictured). There are well over $200 worth of parts, add-ons, and accessories to go along with this guitar. So, I think $350 is a more-than-fair price. I'd prefer to have cash just because I've got doctor bills to pay (BACK INJURIES DUE TO THE INCREDIBLY HIGH NUMBER OF LADIES JUMPING ON ME BECAUSE THEY CANNOT RESIST THE MOJO THIS GUITAR PUTS OFF).
I'd even consider taking less without the case. Show me what you've got. Let's deal!
405-210-2***
DISCLAIMER: ALL INFORMATION DISCLOSED IN ALL CAPS MAY OR MAY NOT BE TRUE, BUT CANNOT BE VERIFIED WITHOUT ANY EXTENSIVE EVIDENCE. THE ABILITY TO INCINERATE THE OPPOSITE GENDER'S UNDERGARMENTS MAY CHANGE BY REGION, AGE, SEASON, AND OVERALL KICKASS-NESS OF THE PROSPECTIVE BUYER. SELLER IS NOT RESPONIBLE FOR ANY VENERIAL DISEASES ACQUIRED FROM SAID MOJO-STRUCK FEMALES. PLEASE EXCERSIZE EXTREME CAUTION WHEN USING THIS GUITAR AS IT MAY CAUSE UNPLANNED PREGNANCIES WITHOUT INTERCOURSE. ALSO, UNICORNS AREN'T ACTUALLY REAL.
Location: M*****
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Here's the ad, for posterity:
We the Best Hands Down
Date: 2012-06-05, 10:36AM EDT
Reply to: [email protected] [Errors when replying to ads?]
Ohio Affiliated will be opening up for Mike Jones June 15th Peabody's Concert Club in Cleveland TIckets are only 17 bucks come support your boys!!!!!!!!!!
(phone number)
They Call me B-Mo the realist rapper alive. I am [crap]in on any cleveland, ohio rapper hands down. I will battle anyone and if i loose then ill just whoop yo azz..
the ladies say im cocky, but im just keepin it real hit my page up on fb and show some love..
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Ohio-Affiliated/340524159294568
i also got a show tomorrow on the 2nd dont be mad im on my grind and you aint
lol im laughing at yall hatas
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
[Invalid or Expired Link Removed]
This has to be a joke...it just has to be.
Oh well, the next time I'm playing a gig that bites, I'll just remember that it could be worse: I could be backing some really lame Rob Stewart impersonator who calls himself "Big Rod" and the extent of his gigging experience is kareoke.
Wow...he's like the Bizzaro World Michael Manring if Michael Manring knew absolutely nothing about how to play a bass.
...his playing is still better than in that video of Steve Wishnevsky playing that fretless Wish Bass during a blues jam.
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