Gassy drummer, smells bad.

[pablomago]

Just put a fan up that blows the stink back to the drummer.

 

[HardNHeavy]

guy might have some serious stomach problems....breath thru mouth when near him

 

[Josh Kneisel]

hook him up to a hose and connect to a pipe to make a Rubens Tube

 

[Kipp Harrington]

Hi,

View attachment 3480282


Thank you for your indulgence,

BassCliff

That’s a mean pair of butt plugs!

 

[Serious Ganja]

Tell him to stop farting damnit!. Spray him with a firehose.

 

[SOUTH PAW]

Which of the royals let one go here? You be the judge!

Seeing this makes me wonder how many times people have gone up and intentionally did this to one of those royal guards. I always assumed they just got challenged to remain stoic and not crack a smile when people would try to make them laugh, but now I'm pretty sure they've endured more than one clown with a foul bowel.

 

[tedious1]

Don't ask me:

During rehearsal once I let rip on the downbeat of a song that runs 2:17 or so. By the time the song was over, the singer was gagging at the end of every line, the guitar player had thrown up, twice, and the drummer nearly passed out holding his breath.

Headlined a show in Coaldale once where the first and second bands were 'crop-dusting' each other. Yep, while the first band was playing, the second was down in front letting em rip. After the first set, they basically swapped spaces and the farting continued. They played together a lot...

I'm not even going to discuss the van during the annual two week tour...

 

[Fender_Bender]

Cork suppositories ?.

 

[bassliner50]

Ask him to forego the bean burritos before a gig. If all else fails, bring a service dog to your gigs and blame the gas it on him.

 

[Rabidhamster]

I would talk to him... not because of the stench, but because it's weird. Maybe recommend a good probiotic.

Probiotics make me blast ass like it’s going out of style. Had to quit taking them. People tell me I’m a fool because they were making me feel better, even though they didn’t.

 

[Rabidhamster]

The past couple of gigs our drummer has been REALLY stinking up the place. I mean, eye watering, cloying, stinking punch to the throat that I'm sure our audience can smell. We play at mid sized bars, so it's not like the audience is that far away. I tend to stand close to the drummer, so occasionally our singer gives me the stink eye, like it's my fault. It's not.

The drummer is a nice guy. I don't know him well enough to say "Dude. No." What to do? Get a fan?

Is it possible he has a prolapsed anus and is just getting an air pump action going due to the foot bouncing on the kick drum?

 

[Nev375]

Every band needs a gimmick. Mic his arse and find some suitable covers.
I suggest having him learning the lead chainsaw part to this:

 

[Keger Jupit]

Actually, this is better..tape it to his throne:

https://www.amazon.com/Subtle-Butt-disposable-neutralizers-saving/dp/B001KYVJSC/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3C3KBJNYWKWS7&keywords=activated+charcoal+underwear&qid=1563421879&s=gateway&sprefix=activated+charcoal+un,aps,157&sr=8-1

One of the funnier reviews on Amazon accompanies this product!

Top Reviews

Ryan P
5.0 out of 5 starsNot for the faint of fart
April 29, 2017
Verified Purchase
These fart pads are fundamentally flawed for filtering flatulence. Failing to function, farts flowed forth freely and frankly, the fragrance is freakishly foul. I fantasized about farting frequently without fearing funky fumes following, but failure to field my flagrant flatulence, I find myself frowning and fretting. Forget fornication or fellatio, I am failing to forge friendships because of my formidable and fiery farts. Fashion first aid, I think not, a fashion faux pax is more fitting.

UPDATE:
My prodigy has a particularly putrid posterior, and predominantly produces silent but perpetually potent farts. He persistently plead for permission to put on a pad. As a passenger on a prolonged car ride, he passed gas plentifully and proudly. We were pleased no prominent or persisting odors were present. This product performs when placed properly and perfectly positioned. This was paramount to his proven performance.
372 people found this helpful

 

[Blueinred]

Seriously, you might recommend that he have his blood sugar tested. I played with a lead singer that didn't control his diabetes and always had horrible sulfur smelling farts. I watched while he cleared the dance floor as the rest of the band was choking. He didn't even notice.

Guess that proves that lead singers sh*t does stink after all. Lead guitarists still think theirs don't.

 

[Keger Jupit]

My favorite is to ask my bandmates if they smell popcorn...

... as in most throwing sports, timing of the release is essential.

 

[Nevada Pete]

Hi,

View attachment 3480282


Thank you for your indulgence,

BassCliff

Cliff, you have once again outdone yourself!

 

[IamGroot]

Seriously, the activated charcoal works really well, if you can get him to take it. I know this because, uh, I have Irritable Bowel Syndrome, which can cause a lot of gas, and back when I was working a desk job I moved to a new department where I had to share a large office with three other people. Um... my private office before then had been perfect for my occasional bad days and I was mortified about how I was going to deal with this. I researched what I could do to avoid that sort of embarrassment and this was the solution. It works really well. No embarrassment at all.

My solution would be 2 large fans and act innocent.

 

[IamGroot]

Probiotics make me blast ass like it’s going out of style. Had to quit taking them. People tell me I’m a fool because they were making me feel better, even though they didn’t.

If probiotics did that, check your diet, esp milk products.

Dont blame the bugs, check the nutrients.

 

[Sid Fang]

 

[two fingers]

Awesome, a fart thread. I needed a laugh tonight. Thank you!

Fight fire with fire. Total war, and all that. If you can't beat him, join him...

Yep. OP, beans beans and more beans!